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 Posted: Mon Jun 02, 2008 5:23 pm
so...
sob story. brace yourself.
my good male friend in a semi-long-distance relationship had this group listed in his facebook profile saying he didn't belong here (he moved here a year ago, away from his girlfriend's town). i joined, posted something about him definitely belonging here, and left the group.
apparently his girlfriend thought i was after him and they had a big fight and he got really mad at me. to calm him down, i told him i'm not at all interested in him and that im dating someone already. thing is, i'm not really dating that person. (this is not the problem).
so he apologized and things were sort of OK- i decided i may as well stay about a mile away from him and i did that, which is hard because he hangs out at a lunch table i sit at every day, where my friends sit. i was doing okay, though, even though it was awkward and i feel that his going off the deep end at me and trying to witch hunt him for liking him really fractured our friendship..
today on facebook he's created a group in direct challenge to me saying he belongs where his girlfriend is "despite some people".
that hurts a lot.
i think i'm going to keep a distance, but i'm wondering if our friendship is completely done for and hence my friendships with the other guys at the table where he sits, just because i don't wanna go near him.
help.
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Posted: Wed Jun 18, 2008 10:43 pm
Wow, that story just combine all my least favorite kinds of people: girlfriends who believe that they are the only ones allowed to care about their boyfriends; and boyfriends who submit to everything their controling girlfriends say and go out of their way to put said girlfriend's needs above everyone elses.
You need to sit back and ask yourself if the friendship with him is really worth your time. I've dealt with my fair share of jealous girlfriends before, but the guy hasn't singled me out on the cause. That's really immature of him and unless things go from sort-of okay to mega okay... than you can definately expect a repeat of this entire ordeal. You're on the girlfriends 'list' now and when she sees your name on his profile or if he mentions you, that's all she'll think about.
Needless, you need to talk to him, just you and him. Go for aim or phone or in person, just make sure it's only you two so there's no scene. There's no reason for him to single you out after getting back on okay terms...
Though, it also might not have been directed at you. There could have been posts from other people after you left his last group,.... people who were also glad to have him in their lives. So it's best to talk to him one on one and make sure it all pans out to be what you think it is... and then dig deeper to find out why he felt the need to do this.
Guys are naturally immature, but only if you let them get away with it. Don't let him get away with this.
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