By SHAFF
Welcome to Issue 17 of TLOEM Newsletter.
We got a butt load of new sections thanks to you guys & especially our latest crew member Quezacoatl.
To start with, FEATURED PROFILE!
By SHAFF
Our first featured profile EVER is 's sxcazn profile.
Click to View.
It's pretty awesome. ;D Go leave her a comment and tell her she's a sexy asian.
By SHAFF
Augusts Moron of the Month will be announced in august, obviously.
Art will come soon too!
Go vote for who you want to be Moron of the Month!
By King of Aquatica
Alright, here's what's going on with Gaia that you guys might not know.
The Disappearance of the Domo-
You might have seen that our beloved domo emote is now gone. Some people are pretty pissed since they all love it. But believe it or not, Gaia was threatened to be sued if they did not take it down. I have not heard, but rumors say that Viacom actually purchased the rights of "Domo".
Team Jackets ohnoes-
So you see "Full Body Cast" and it's icon in the inventory page. It looks like a jacket. If you zoom in alot, you can actually see a barton leaf. Which led some people to believe that we would get "Team Jackets" but recently, Fleep said this:
"I'm 99% certain that the whole "team jacket" concept was a rumor."
So, does that mean the icon for Full Body Cast, is actually nothing? Or does Fleep know nothing? Hmm...
GAIA IM wtf-
Recently, in a journal from a mod, or dev, idk, I forgot. They said that GIM would be released soon. It will be based on an AOL Messenger? Or something like that. And you can talk to people on Gaia with it, and there will also be a feature that lets you just hit a button and it will send a link or something to the other person you are chatting to, so they can go to the same thread/etc. Meh, to me, GIM seems so stupid. Just an easier way to cyber!11!!!1one1!
By StationWagon
Aimless shadows has 137 post and donated 1337 golds
Now show me your bewbs
Techno Rape is the nerd with the laptop who taught me how to make a Sex on the Beach by looking it up on Wikipedia.
King of Aquatica has like 40 posts right now. lolol fail.
Rampage! At the Brothel haves 1005 posts
hey, what are you doing later tonight wink
LizzyJayne has made over 700 posts in this guild
Plz dont stop
mojito is a bad influence neutral
Rumors Of Blue Whales has 2134 posts I likes that number
I likes whales too
Dragn Breth II about to hit the 2k mark after accidentally quitting the guild-how do you accidentally quit?
Bedsheets has not done anything important as far as posting goes
Gale-chan is never in my section-so uh here ya go
Hasina Rini owes me 250k
she has 883 postest's
Liver and Onions because everyone needs some Liver and Onions. ;D
Tenshi heavens is asain-but report have not been confirmed yet as to weather or not she is emo-wheres my art?
Yami Adritha has 500 something and finally changed her avatar
Ripper-Roo posts in this guild "HECK YES"
Also Alterdeus is not in this newsletter
Also again HI GOLLY!!!!!!!
By Miss Shirahime
Miss Shirahime: Miss Shirahime here, I'm going to be interviewing Quezacoatl today.
Quezacoatl: Oh really? :C omg and i didn't put my makeup on today! Hello~
Miss Shirahime:You don't need makeup, your fur looks pristine without it.
Alright, on to the questions, Out of all of Gaia, what is your favorite place to be?
Quezacoatl: Aww, you're a sweetie. Hmmm, I guess what I'm supposed to say is The League of Extraordinary Morons, huh? But I'd have to say my home is still the Exchange. I've been on there since I was a wee little one on Gaia. Those guys are my homeboys.
Miss Shirahime:You can say whatever you want. That's what editing is for!
Okay, So you like hanging out in the Exchange? Are you rich as cause of this constant tom-foolery in the forum?
Quezacoatl: Pffft, I'm not THAT rich. That guy face-plant or whatever has a panda hat. :C I want a panda hat. But I guess you could say yeah, I've got cash in my pockets thanks to the Exchange!
Miss Shira:I'm going to resist saying "Donate plz"
So you "kick it" outside of the Guild in the Exchange. What are some of your favorite features about the Guild?
Quezacoatl : Ohhoho, maybe later. I've reached my donating limit for the month.
Favorite features, huh? Ohh, that's a tough one. Uhhm. I like the people in it? There's always someone interesting to talk to. And there's always someone to draw you art, too! Even if we are a little art-crazy.
Miss Shira:Yes, we do love art don't we?
Speaking of the arts, any favorite (movie)soundtracks you like?
Quezacoatl: As for soundtracks, lemme think about it. For a while I listened to Phantom of the Opera over and over? But I don't really like it anymore. Probably the soundtrack to Tokyo Drift is my favorite. I can listen to it OVEr and OVER and still be happy.
Miss Shira: Amazing! That's commitment.
So how do you like being on Crew?
Quezacoatl: It's really fun, actually! I just got on it but I'm already really, really enjoying it. ;D And okay, having the tiniest bit of POWER in the guild is also exciting. lol no, i promise not to abuse it. Scout's honor!
Miss Shira: Which Scout?>icon_biggrin.gif
Kidding aside are there any places in your hometown you like to come for peace, like a park?
Quezacoatl: ;D Sailor Moon. Wait. she's a scout, right? Sailor scouts... right!
Ha, I live in Anchorage, Alaska! It's a barren wasteland with wolves prowling around every corner and one convenience store stocked with the bare essentials. No, no, just kidding. Actually, it's a pretty big city. My favorite place would have to be the neighborhood around where I live. There's this really gorgeous lake I'll walk to with my dog. It always makes me feel really peaceful.
Miss Shira: In the English version yes.
That sounds beautiful.
Any last words you'd like to share with the Guild?
Quezacoatl: Last words? Don't do drugs, and don't trust shorty! And most importantly, keep it real! ;D
By Quezacoatl
Welcome to the first installment of Ask an Alaskan with me, Aztec! I know a lot of you out there have huge problems that you need serious answers to, and I'm here to help.
Every newsletter, I'll be answering the questions of you, the members, and giving advice to all the poor people out there who need it.
If you'd like your question to be included in the next issue of TLOEM, just send me a PM with your question, and whether you'd like to remain anonymous or not.
SO, without further adieu, question number one.
John the Blogger writes, "Dear Aztec. I've been having problems getting it up. Can you please help?"
Don't you worry, dear, Aztec is here! Now listen carefully, because I'm going to give you the exact instructions to help your little friend down there.
First, you need to fill an entire bathtub with sugar. I don't care how you get that sugar, dear, but somehow you need to fill an entire bathtub with it. Once that's done, you need to crumble a packet of oreos in it.
Go to the local zoo, and kidnap one of the monkeys there. Name him Freddie, it's a good name for a monkey. Lock him in the room with the bathtub, and wait until he's flung a sufficient amount of poo around the room. You'll know when it happens, it's very obvious. After that, if you're lucky, the sugar and oreos will have mixed with the poo to create a gooey, smelly mixture.
Rub this on the affected area, and voila! You'll never have that embarrassing problem again.
Another solution would be to look up "Two Girls, One Cup" on google. Thanks for writing, and I hope this solves it!
On to question two.
Anonymous asks, "I have this huge crush on this guy who's a complete jerk in the guild. What do I do?"
There are many different types of jerks in the world. There are the ones who are doing it just because they think it's funny, and others who don't even realize what assholes they're being. Determining which one YOUR guy is should be the first step.
Once you've determined, I've got a game plan for Catching Your Jerk.
If he's the funny jerk type, try to get on his level. Make the same jokes he does, try to understand him, and break through that barrier. Chances are, he's not really a jerk on the inside, and he'll appreciate your friendship. If he doesn't, just tell me and I'll beat him up.
As for the second type of jerk, this kind really isn't worth your time, hun. They're the 'internet badasses' who try to act cool and really only end up being really mean, without realizing how they're portraying themselves. Your best bet with this type of jerk is to let him go. I know it may be hard, but there's plenty of guys out there who don't need a visit from Mr and Mrs 'My Fists'.
If he doesn't fit either one of these categories, go with the age-old trick of dressing up like a slut and catching his attention! It works every time. (Or you could just try having a serious conversation with him. But my bet's on the slut trick.)
Good luck, and happy hunting!
Miss Shirahime asks, "Is there really life after death?"
This is always a hard question, because there's really no real way of knowing is there? It'd be kind of badass, if when we died we went to a video game arcade or something where there were always quarters and an endless amount of prizes, or... whatever your idea of heaven is.
But the real problem is, unless you want to hire a psychic who will probably make it all up anyways, there's no way of asking the dead what it's like. Still, you have to wonder about all of the ghost stories floating around.
If ghosts exist, who's to say that the spirits that DO move on don't go to a better place? It's all an issue of what you yourself believe. Search around, find out what feels right to you, and stick with it. After all, it's your mind, and your decisions. <3
Our last question of the day comes from Anonymous. He/she writes, "Dear Aztec. I broke a girl's heart recently, but I really want to apologize and be her friend. How can I?"
This is also a tough one, because a girl's heart can be very fragile at times. She may not want to see you again, or at least she's told herself that. But the truth is, every girl says that sort of thing when her heart has been broken. She puts up the tough act, and tries to pretend like she's not hurt, but she may very well be.
What you need to do is swallow your pride, be nice, and sincerely apologize to her. Let her know you never meant to her hurt, but you're VERY sorry that you did. Let her know that you still want to be friends, but at the same time you need to realize that might not be possible.
The most important thing you need to do though, is make her realize that you want to make things right. It's her decision whether or not she wants to let you. Sometimes, things just don't work out according to plan, and it's important to understand that that's really okay.
C'est la vie!
Well, that's all the time we have today! Stick around next time for the next Ask an Alaskan. Don't forget to PM me your questions.
By Gale-Chan
s**t, back to member... But fear not dear guildies! I will not leave you without your favorite part of our awesome newsletter, mine. <3
Who am I kidding >.> Does anyone even read this every time? DB
Anyways, on with the section! Gossip updates from Newsletter 16 are ancient news and even I can't believe all the changes the guild went through since last time I wrote a section. First off, look at our crew, we have a lot of new faces o: It's also almost back to one whole page long, great job Shaff...
We also have some old members' comebacks, like Golly and Angle =] Srsly, if you don't remember the times when we hanged out with this two, you are neither Bane, Digny nor me, which is good, so don't try to steal our epic lifes/bodies/minds/spirits, k? ;D
My activity ratios along with some other oldie members ones have gone down, along with some other members' ones going up instead, so the guild looks like if we entered a different dimension or something, yay! =D
Finally, I hope you are all up to date with our guild's plot, believe me, you better remember all of it by October or else I can assure you you'll be in a tight situation. =P
Until next time
xoxo, Gossip Girlale
*I hate that commercial so much Dx*
By Quezacoatl
Hello, and welcome to the first installment of Cooking with Quez, a new section due to popular demand by some of our, ah, portlier members.
I'm your Chef for the day, and our first recipe is a delicious little number with earl grey, white chocolate, and sour cream! A strange combination, but believe me, these muffins are absolutely delicious.
They come from my favorite cooking blog ever, eat me delicious, and you can find the recipe right here.
Believe me, if you're a fan of muffins these will blow you away. If you think they're too sweet, feel free to cut the sugar down, or if you want to substitute a different type of tea, go right ahead. You won't be disappointed.
Tune in next time for another recipe, on Cooking with Quez!
By Ehhdolf Pifler
My avatar wins this weeks Ehhvatar Spotlight because like in the other Spotlights before this one I cbf to look at people's avatars and from what I did see most everyone's sucked. Plus my avatar has a certain charm to it that makes it sexy.
By Hippie Bane
WELCOME ONE AND ALL TO ANOTHER EDITION OF "gaming for morons"
CAPSLOCKCAPSLOCKCAPSLOCK
this week, were trying something old again. I found my copy of "super mario RPG" for the super nintendo.
but uhh...I didn't play it, instead I played the N64 game "diddy kong racing"
this colorful racing/adventure game hybrid brought some serious contention to the current best kart racing game (mario kart, duh) and it brought a lot of cool new things to the table, like being able to race planes and boats as well as the standard cars, and, by collecting multiple of the same powerup, making your attacks on other racers stronger. there a great variety in tracks, and its a lot of fun!
good luck finding a hard copy of this game, though.
happy gaming, guild!
By Dragn Breth II
Howdy there TLOEM, and welcome to Dragns ROCKkkk.
This song was introduced to me by step-brother, who you might know as [G]aian/The Dark Knight of Night/Mikalak The Strange
It is "Comfort Eagle", by Cake.
I think it is very awesome, I'm sure you will think so to.
woooo
By
Episode 5 of My Wife and Kids
This is the one where the black guy does something funny and his wife tells him off or something and his kids are whores. Plus theres a smart kid who has a superpower in heroes.
by SHAFF
We added "Moron Quests" in the Information thread, and here are our latest Moron Quest Affiliates.
Moron Quests currently include //
If you want to be an Affiliate of TLOEM, PM me.
by SHAFF
By SHAFF
Thanks to Quezacoatl for the new name.
Name Changes //
Primary Colours ---> Rumors of Blue Whales
Kur0mii ---> Kyriios
Latest Crew //
Quezacoatl // Member ---> Crew
unB& //
Mysterious A // Welcome back, Mysterious A. sorry for banning you lol.
The Censorship Fairy // owned @ losing 3000 posts
King of Aquatica // Banned him over 9000 times but he's back.
B& //
Nobody has been banned!
Well, they have. But they just came back.
Events //
No events currently, but I'll get the crew to come up with some soon. =D
Information Thread: Moronic Stuff //
Check out Moronic Stuff in the Information Thread HERE.
It tells you to do a couple of things and also has the link to our towns HQ.
We really need to use it. gonk
TLOEM's TTGAT //
This was originally a place to just talk to get art, but you can spam it for art.
So check it out and get art. ;D
That is all.
mad
![[color=emo]'s avatar](https://a1cdn.gaiaonline.com/dress-up/avatar/ava/1a/da/410ca4a64bda1a_flip.png?t=1402541809_6.00_01)
