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 Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:38 pm
I think of this topic a lot, seeing as my niece is a very disturbed child thanks to her wonderfully inept mother and multiple fathers. I'd like to ask for your answers/opinions on the following questions:
-Do you believe it's ever appropriate to physically punish a child (spank them, slap their wrists, etc.)?
Do you believe it is appropriate to berate a child and emotionally attack them as a form of punishment?
-What do you believe is the correct way to raise the typical child, concerning how they should be punished and such?
-Do you believe the American government is over-protective of children, and that any of the many bills made each year to prohibit the smacking or spanking of a child are necessary?
My opinions:
- There is nothing wrong with using occasional spankings to punish a child or teach them right from wrong. A toddler is not going to understand logic, common sense, or any of our advanced "adult" concepts by explaining the concepts to them; afterall, morals are simply our adaptations to what is generally considered the "right thing to do." A normal child wouldn't understand complex feelings or ethics until they were taught it, and given examples by their parents, and also shown the difference between negative and positive behaviors- positive behavior would result in praise, and negative behavior would result in scolding or a stern slap on the wrists.
- All parents should understand emotional abuse causes emotional trauma and scarring. Telling a child off by insulting them or berating them is barbaric, and a senseless thing for an adult to do.
- It does depend on the child, of course.. but I've seen far too many children spoiled with that "politically correct punishment" and other hoo-haw. It's a parent's job to support their child and help them flourish, to teach them morals and how to be a good person and part of society. To do that, the parent needs to teach their child bad behavior results in negative reactions and good behavior results in positive reactions. How they teach that always differs, and there's nothing wrong with scolding a child, even with a belt (as long as it's not, like, a spiky belt O.o).
- The government should never pass a law that prohibits spanking or disciplining a child. Note: there's a huge, visual difference between abuse and disciplining a child.
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Posted: Thu Aug 07, 2008 10:54 am
As I have been disciplined in my life more than my siblings, I say very firmly, no, it is not okay to physically hit your child unless there is going to be actual pain from not obeying, i.e, sticking your finger in a socket. This is not to say children should not be disciplined at all; there needs to be boundaries set. A quiet yet firm voice should be used to establish communications, like what teachers use to control their kids.
Verbal and emotional abuse ARE NEVER OKAY. A child's mind remembers all the words, remembers the tone, and still remembers as an adult.
As for laws in the United States, considering the deaths to abuse these days, they are not tight enough for the kids they are supposed to protect. They definitely need revision. -shrugs- There's my two cents.
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Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2008 9:48 pm
i think that spanking children is not a good idea, though i do agree that it's okay if it really is for a greater good, such as keeping a kid from being electrocuted. in my opinion, it is never a good idea to teach our children to do things out of fear.
and as to attacking a child emotionally, i think it's a bad idea too, though my ideas on this may be a bit warped. my mother has kindly shared her low self esteem and guilt complexes with us kids =) i'm still trying to purge my subconscious of them.
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