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 Posted: Fri Dec 26, 2008 1:40 pm
I could never forget that day. I could never forget the pain, feeling as if knives were being dragged across my skin. . . The curse of never forgeting. The curse of me, Zuri. The feel of never breathing, the feel, as if I couldn't move. . . I remember how I felt as if I was being trapped, held there forever. Forever. . . Forever never forgeting. . .
I don't think it was all that good. sad
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Posted: Sat Dec 27, 2008 7:20 am
This isn't bad. It's short and it gets to the point. I like it. [:
About the ellipses. If you use an ellipses for the end of a sentence, you have to use 4 dots (3 for the ellipses, 1 for the period).
Also, maybe you should say "I will never forget that day. I will never..." instead of using could. Just a suggestion.
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Posted: Sat Dec 27, 2008 9:51 pm
MUST.READ.STORY.BEHIND.IT!!!!!!! *chews finger nails off in anticipation*
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Posted: Wed Feb 18, 2009 3:07 pm
I'm interested. What's the story behind this? I'd elaborate, and maybe use a few less elipses. Other than that, it's a most definate start.
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