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Black Bishop

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Ayase Heart

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PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2009 6:17 am


My story takes place in like the future but everyones back in middle ages.Its a series of seperate storys,first with my fav charcter the Bishop.Next will be the night then so on and so forth.Pawns do not have storys.Its the peices from a chess board.Please be nice and enjoy my hard worked 2 pages!I will continue it later when i come with more ideas and inspiration.This story is also in the arenas and please check it out.


Black Bishop


I am the bishop of the Black Night Imperial Guard for queen Star and king Markeus.They rule the battlefield always but I and other swear our lives to protecting them.I am a bishop,master of magic and tacticle skill.My name is Cross.That name was givin to me with honer by thy queen,i cherish it as I do her.She is the only female in our castle and needs us to keep her safe.She may eb the most powerful,but evan she has her limits.I remember when I started as a rook.I was just a chiled born into the world of wars and armys.Those words she said to me that day,when i was first found,those soft sweet words she said as her long blong hair flowed in the wind."I want you to be mine."Ever since then iv been makeing my way through the ranks so that I may be as close to her as possable.Many times I have been beaten,cut,shot,evan stabed.All to make sure she is happy and safe.Two years its been since i was prmoted to bishop.And i have loved every second of that two years,all the war,battles,and pain.If i could relive it i would change not a thing.

I will see the queen soon and talk with her about helping one of the surounding kingdoms that is still being rebuilt.Ever since the revolution things are still being rebuilt and remodled.Sciencetists discovered that all the machienery that we had was killing our home,millions of people suffered a worse fate then death.So things went back to "The Middle Ages" and has been that way for 100 years.But its better this way,the air and water is cleaner,there is less dieses and death nowa days.Where great citys of buildings once were there is now lush forest.I herd about the citys,I just always thought they were rumers of myths.There still being reaserched into though.The oceans are bright and bluye and full of wonderful cretures.To many to name.The queen loves the ocean,its to bad that its so far away.If it were closer I would take her there more often,but sadly the queen canot go to far for fear of attacks on here,and the king.He gets very jelous and angry when she leavs.Without her he would be nothing,he needs her,but I need her more.Some say i have fallen under some seductive spell,but insted I have fallen in love.
PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2009 12:04 pm


Wow, its very nice so far. There are numerous spelling errors and some sentences need a little work but I think it flows nicely.
So each chess piece has its own little story? Interesting. I like the idea very much. It seems like its still in the early process. As you get farther in to, make the chapter n each character longer and expand on it. It would help make it stronger.

Oerba Dia Vanira
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Ayase Heart

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PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2009 2:01 pm


Thank you,i know i cant spell,and yes every character that has power has a story.Like now im doing Bishop Cross,next is Knight Kira,but each one has a duble so i gata make 2 of each character.only dif names and personalitys.The king and queen though will be the hardest and i am open to sugestions.
PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2009 2:02 pm


~~Sugestions~~
none

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Oerba Dia Vanira
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PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2009 6:52 pm


Will there's going to be a black and a white queen......maybe something like alice in wonderland can be refernce but there was no black queen, only a white queen. But when there's a black one to oppose you would think the white one was nice and the other mean.
I remember that the movie mirrormask had two queens in it too. A white and a black.
I think, whatever you do with the queen and king, the queens would have to be the most important charcter. Though the king would still need to have some backbone at least.
PostPosted: Mon May 18, 2009 1:07 pm


Well as for the evil and good i wont have a black and white unless i know the first series does good.And i have a plan with the kind and queen,the king wil have a backbone thats for sure,i plan to change things around like in books,the climax.

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PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2009 7:38 pm


yeah. make sure you got an outline or something drawn out, either in your head or something, so you don't lose track of what you are doing.
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