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I had left home to stop hurting. If I would stop lying to myself for five minutes, I would realize I left to get away from Diaz. When I first met him I knew I was in trouble, when I saw the way he mourned for his family, I knew I was a goner. It’s been awhile since we fought in the castle of Shock, but I can’t seem to forget anything from the past year of my life. I’m old and, not that I’ll ever admit my age but, I can barely remember what happened five minutes ago, but somehow I can remember everything since the fighting tournament. Since Tec died.
Everything.
And I can’t keep lying to myself, so I’m going back to where I came from…

I’m lost…in the Black forest. Something is following me…but there is no way to be sure whether it is friend or foe. Honesty, I am afraid…I wish I had never left home.
Not sure if I said it out loud or not I sooth my fear with one word, “Diaz.” With that I fall asleep in a tree, very far off the ground; I’ll figure a way out of here later.

There is no proper way to ‘find’ your way through the black forest- it is the black forest for a reason. I haven’t been able to tell when it’s day or when it’s not. It is aggravating, tiring, and there is still something following me. It’s too dark to find anything, and I’ve exhausted everything I can…with no results. I am still completely lost.

I found my compass, and I headed north, a very general direction to find Siberia. It got colder and for once I was happy. The thing following me seemed to disappear as I took my first steps back into daylight. It was probably just a figment of my imagination. As soon as I found daylight I continued on my way to my birthplace. My summer dresses and fighting garb had to be switched out for my wolf skin jackets, so I wouldn’t be attacked as an outsider by the stray wolves too proud to join a sect. I haven’t been this cold in ages and I haven’t missed it. It’s taken me three months to get this far, boats and hiking, and putrid human areas, so it’s useless to go home, besides Diaz is there…and I can’t go through that again, when he so obviously loves Sora more than me. It’s my own fault; I subjected myself to the pain for so long I became accustomed to it. Now that I’m gone it feels weird for my heart not to tug, for it not to ache as he kisses Sora, oddly I miss it, it’s a part of home, where I am not…

Behind me the snow crunched softly, I pulled weapons out of my side pouch and held them at the ready. A man walked from the shadows of the trees I had just left.

“I’m sorry!” He exclaimed, “I didn’t mean to startle you!”

“Who the hell are you and why have you been following me?” I demanded, noting his side-pack also. I knew I hadn’t been hearing things in the forest.

“I was lost- I thought maybe if I followed you, then you could lead me out. And you did. I was told to find something…but I don’t exactly remember what it was anymore.” Oh god…it was me in male form…

“Uh-huh, so scaring the s**t out of me is your way of fixing things?”

“Well I put the compass into your pack…” He shrugged shyly. I rolled my eyes he was blushing.

“I knew it!” I exclaimed pointing at him, “I didn’t lose my compass; you took it!”

“I’m sorry!” He fell to knees and bowed, I thought I was going to vomit. I felt a headache brewing.

“Up,” I commanded. “On your feet dumbass!” I said louder when he didn’t move. Mechanically he got to his feet and looked at me as if he were going to hug me…which I wanted to avoid if possible. I love hugs, but I don’t need the guy thinking I’m the Christ come to save him. “What is your name?”

“Tentholuaintian” He replied happily, but at the stunned/confused look on my face he added, “Everyone calls me T, though.” He was quick to throw in, “What is your name?”

“Yanagi, but I haven’t gone by that in a long time,” I still looked to him with suspicion, “Where are you from? And what’s with your clothes? Aren’t you cold?”

He looked down at his tattered rags, “Oh well you see…there was this bear…”

I sighed and waved away the rest of his explanation, I didn’t need to hear it, “Take my coat,” I grudgingly removed my jacket. I would adapt, he, however, would never adapt to the climate in Siberia, no matter how long he lived there.

“Are you sure?” He asked, reaching out for my jacket despite his doubts.

Another sigh escaped my mouth, “Positive, I was only wearing so I wouldn’t be attacked by pig-headed rouges…or my idiot brothers, it’s been awhile since I left. They probably won’t recognize me with long black hair. Hell I don’t think my twin sister could recognize me I’ve changed so much.”

“There are two of you?!” T asked excitedly. Could he get anymore pathetic?

“Yeah, physically I guess. She’s nothing like me though.” I shrugged tiredly, this trip needed to end soon.

He followed me, too close for comfort, through the next clearing then announced, “My dojo is near here.” As we continued to walk I couldn’t help but notice T, the outside anyways. He was tall. He might have even been taller than Diaz, which in and of itself made him at least a foot taller than me…I’m so ********’ short…He had a nice face, not like Diaz’s angelic face, but it was pleasant. Toned, not as toned as Diaz…Wow…I’m sad… I need to do something to make me forget him. While I was lost in my thoughts we had arrived at T’s dojo. I had meant not to follow him, but somehow had followed him all this way to his dojo.

lol, cute so far
What kinda clothes in mexico? xd

*in corner* emo Sano...has left me...

YOU GUYS ARE IN TE WRONG STORY!!!!! TRY THE ONE NEXT DOOR!!!! >.0

chapter 3

So I thought a lot about whether or not I really wanted to go back home to see my biological family. In the end I asked T what he thought…

“T,” I interrupted his class of smelly little boys kicking each other in the chest. He turned around to face me.

“Yanagi? Don’t you have a class right now?” He asked concern flooded his voice.

“I did, and then I threw all of them in the lake. They’re just too weak, but that’s not what I came to talk to you about.” I spoke urgently.

“What? What’s wrong?” He demanded worried.

“Should I go back home to the Derezuk family?”

He sighed, “I thought you had a real problem.”

“HEY!” I whined, “That is a real problem it’s been bothering me for longer than a week, so it officially qualifies as a real problem!”

“So what do you want me to do about it?” He asked.

“I wanna go…but I don’t wanna go by myself.” I paused and looked up to him with a small tear in my eye, “Would you go with me?”

He was mentally beating himself up for what he was about to say, I could tell by the heavy sigh and the line forming above his eyebrows. I smiled unsurely when he looked down at me, “Please?” I asked barely more then a whisper.

“I’ll ask. If I can go how long would we be gone?”

“No longer than a month…it’s not like I want a family reunion.” Under my breath I added, “Although that’s probably what I’m going to get.”

“Yanagi, when is the last time you went to see the Derezuk family?”

I bit my lip; I should have known this was coming. “Well you see… It’s a really long story that I don’t very much want to get into. It involves a lot of blood, a lot of anger, and too many memories.” Alas he was persistent, my short evasion only made him want to know more.

The glow in his eye, he wanted to know… He began to open his mouth and before he had a chance to form the words I kissed him. “Don’t even think about asking me anything about what happened at that accursed home before I left form Mexico. A single question and I will carve your tongue out and shove it so far up your a**…” I heard his audible gulp. “Are we clear on this?” He nodded. “Good, I’ll see you later I have to go fish my subjects out of the lake.” I kissed his cheek, and he blushed. “Later T.”

Fishing my students out of the lake was fun, and easy, since they were all out of the lake already. I think one of them was turning blue but I shoved a couple of herbs down their throat and they were fine. I was in a really good mood…and nobody knew why. Even I wasn’t completely sure why I was happy, I was about to make the second largest mistake of my life. Granted, I didn’t know that at the time but if I did I would never have gone back to the Derezuk’s. I convinced myself it was O.k. because I was not going to be alone with my former family; T was going to be with me. I wish that had been enough.

The happiness I had spilled onto other people, Erik was mildly excited that his student was happy. Secretly I had told Erik we were going to get married so that he would have to say it was alright for T to go with me. He was very big on old time customs, which is why the dojo was so grossly male dominated, so the fact that T was asking my parents permission for marriage was a big plus. Then Erik announced it at dinner to everyone and I had forgotten to tell T. His face was almost as red as the T-shirt he had on which made me want to hug him; he was just so adorable. He looked as if he were going to explode his face was so red, but after forcing him up to talk about the marriage proposal he seemed more relaxed with the idea of pretending to marry me. Then I came to the realization that he actually thought we were getting married, then, I was not O.K. with the idea.

I talked to T about it, but he was so excited I could barely stand to tell him. I walked away with my head hung in shame while T looked after me as I walked. He had become friendlier since the “marriage proposal” and was even helping me pack up what little I had brought with me. Then we had one final meal with the chauvinistic pigs that T trained with, left the front of the dojo instead of accompanying them on their morning run. He held my hand as we walked then turned and took one final look at his school before looking back at me and smiling.

“What’s wrong T?” I asked.

“Nothing,” He sighed.

“You’re a liar,” I smiled, “You don’t have to come with me, I can always just go back to Mexico instead of to the Derezuk. Or I could just go visit my Nii-Sama!”

“You’re older…brother?” He hesitated, and then added, “You’ll go see voluntarily but going to see the Derezuk’s is worse than pulling teeth.” He rolled his eyes and smiled. “Honestly, I have never left the dojo. I was born near here by one of the students and as soon as I could walk my father dropped me off at the door of the dojo and left with my mom. Erik has been the only father-ish figure I’ve ever had.”

I was crying, tears spilling out of my eyes, and I didn’t know why. I never cried, well only a few times when Diaz hit me on the head and abused me in other brotherly ways but never thought once of informing me I was special. But that was because Diaz was a butthead, and I was suddenly mad at him. In another five minutes that anger would be gone. But that would be beside the point, I never cry. Despite that here I was, crying on T’s shoulder, because of something that happened over twenty years ago.

“Yanagi, it’s ok.” He stroked my hair, “It’s not that bad. Yeah it sucked, but you get over it and move on.”

“I don’t…I don’t know why I’m crying!” I sobbed onto his shoulder.

“You’re not hurt, there’s nothing wrong, you’re fine. You are fine, Yanagi,” He forced me to look up at him, reminding me of the day I cried my eyes out on Diaz because I finally exploded all of my feelings on to him. He did the same thing then, made me look him in the eye.

“Diaz…” I muttered looking up to T, the tears blurred my vision.

He smiled, hurt, “Not Diaz, T.” He held me closer, “You’re fine Yanagi.”

Chapter 5: Patience is a virtue of the blessed- Impatience is expected from the rest of us
It was warm when I woke up. It was strange to wake up warm in the middle of a frozen desert, but T’s arms were wrapped around me tight- and we were not in the snowy clearing we had fallen asleep in.

“Nee-chan!” I shot up in bed at the sound of the familiar voice.

“Recca-nii!!!” I exclaimed, tripping over T trying to get to my older brother. “Ow,” I muttered landing on my face and waking up T.

Recca laughed, and helped me to my feet. If he’d known I was going to tackle him to the ground right after he might not have helped me up, but I could not help it I was really excited to see him.

“Nee-chan… I missed you too!” I squeezed him tight, “Yanagi-nee, I can’t… breathe”

“Oh, sorry.” I loosened my grip a little, “Recca-nii, how did you find me?” I snuggled closer to his chest.

“I didn’t find you, one of my wolves did and he came back to tell me I had trespassers. Luckily I went out to see instead of telling him to eat you. Although, you probably would have woken up and killed him so it was good for both of us. So who is your companion?”

“That’s T. We’re engaged!” I exclaimed, and saw the familiar anger in his eyes. “Nii-sama, I picked him. He’s a good man. I promise. We’re going back to Mexico!”

“Just like all the other good men…”

“Just to remind you, mom and dad decided on all of them. I just married them and killed them. It’s not my fault that our parents have poor judgment.”

“Right. What about that Diaz guy in Mexico you’ve been all over?” He asked. I looked away, trying to drop a hint for him to change the subject.

T came to my rescue, “Yeah, I come from the Kaze Dojo of middle Germany.”

“Ah, found a nice ninja!” Recca laughed and wiggled his eyebrows for me to see.

I laughed, “Recca~nii! That’s not funny!” I declared pounding on his chest.

“Then why are you laughing?” He grabbed my waist and tickled.

“AHHHH!” I squealed and squirmed trying to get away from him, but my attempts were futile. “Reeca-nii! Recca-nii, stop!” But he was relentless and refused to stop until I hit my head on the table and wailed loudly.

After that he held me in his lap as if I were still a child and rubbed my head. I sulked. “You’re mad,” He said.

“You should have stopped when I said so!” I pouted.

He continued to rub my head, “You’re just being a baby, like always.”

“Shut-up nii-sama…”

“Why haven’t you been home? Tama-nee is angry with you.”

“I don’t care if Tama-nee is mad at me, as long as you still like me then I don’t care what anyone else may think. You’re not mad at me for leaving are you?” I looked up to him, I knew I looked sad and my eyes were brimming with tears.

“Of course not, I know you were going insane here. But as the baby of our family everyone worries about you, and it’s not as if you write to us. Well you write to me, but not to anyone else in the family.”

“You’re the only one that understands me. That’s why I write you, because they may worry about me but they don’t understand what I want.” I mumbled, idly wondering if T had fallen back to sleep or was listening to me and my brother gush.

Recca kissed the top of my head. “They just don’t understand what was going through your head when you ran away. You needed something else. Being a princess isn’t for you, I get that. It didn’t take long to figure out, you know after you socked that dignitary in the face when you were twenty all because he looked at you the wrong way.”

“Nii-sama, he was married and checking me out it was gross. Why can’t you just forget about that minor incident?”

“Yanagi,” He said sternly, “you almost started a war.”

“Well if he hadn’t touched me then I wouldn’t have touched him…” I pouted.

Recca laughed, “Nee-chan, you have anger issues.”

“Not anymore!” I yelled defensively, “Nii-sama, how come everyone yells at me for leaving home but you live out in the desert all by yourself and no one yells at you for it?”

“Nee-chan, I got married and moved out.”

I sat there dumbfounded until it sunk in. “Wait… RECCA!!!” I yelled, “YOU GOT MARRIED AND I WAS NOT INVITED!!!” It was not a question it was an angry demand for an explanation as to what happened while I was in Mexico.

“No one was,” He mumbled. “It was me and her and a pastor.”

“B-but…” I blubbered, the tears finally spilling over. “A-and I came all the way… out here to tell you…b-but you didn’t even tell me!” I pushed away from him. “You’re the only reason I didn’t go straight back to Mexico!”

“Nee-chan,” He hugged me close, “I meant to tell you, I really did.”

“Fine, whatever,” I mumbled.

“Don’t be that way,”

“Why?” I demanded, “I trusted you! It’s always been you and me nii-sama! Why would you neglect to tell me something that important?”

“B-because, I just, I didn’t want you to come up. If you had known then you would have left your friends there and come here.”

“That is the most pathetic, selfless, stupid, thing that I have ever heard of! You’re an idiot! And I want to meet this woman, or man. I’m not really here to judge, because if that was the reason for not telling me that would make sense. But then again, I might have just dragged all of my friends up here too, so maybe your reason wasn’t so illogical.”

He just smiled, “Baka,” I thought he muttered, but I did not care if he thought I was an idiot. He was an even bigger idiot.

“Nii-sama, you know I’m not going to stay very long, right? I want to get back to Mexico soon.” I mumbled. T had moved to a real bed and gone back to sleep, I must have been pushing him too hard and Recca and I moved onto the sofa to talk.

“I kind of figured you would have only come to Siberia if it was unavoidable. I thought I would only see you every hundred years or so for your cleansing.” He laughed.

“But then it wouldn’t be as much fun to pop up randomly into your life and scare the crap out of you. It keeps you on your toes nii-sama! Keeps your house clean because you will never know when I will pop up to visit you with my husband or possibly my children.”

“Have you been day dreaming about the perfect marriage again?” He asked sternly.

“Maybe, but what’s wrong with that?” I muttered.

“You know it is never going to happen. No one will ever match that made-up person in your head. That is impossible if you look at it statistically.”

“Of course it is statistically impossible, but I dreamt of him, not in a day dream in a night dream. He does exist why else would I see him in a dream! I will find him.”

“So it wasn’t Diaz?” Recca said, not asking, just stating a fact.

“Nope! It was T, silly. Why else would I bring him home to you? But since we’ll be living in Mexico you’re going to visit us when we have children. Ok?”

“Whatever.”

I smiled, that was Recca’s way of promising me.

For once it was a tearful goodbye. I never did get to see Recca’s “wife” which made me a little suspicious, but Recca had his reasons for not showcasing her (or him). I still like to believe that she never existed to begin with. T and I left my brother’s house after I made him blood swear not to tell mother and father that I had even remotely been near the country. Tension still loomed in that relationship, as well as the relations with my eleven sisters and the rest of my brothers. At over a hundred they still did not consider me ready to be out in the world all by myself, but what the hell parents don’t really know anything.

“Bye-bye nii-sama, I love you!”

“Yeah, yeah, I love you too, now get going to Mexico!” He waited at the edge of his land until the snowy hills of Siberia consumed T and me.

I decided to take T the long way, instead of boating from Russia back to Mexico, I headed through America and Canada. He was used to colder weather and I knew from personal experience that going from extreme cold to extreme heat would shock your system and potentially harm you permanently. So we went the long way, stopping for days at a time so that he would adjust easier than I had. We reached Kansas, one of the middle states in America, and stopped. T was realizing fur wasn’t a good accessory in urban cities in the south. It had been ok up north and no one stared at him too much, but wolf pelts definitely stood out in Kansas. He refused to throw out his furs as I had done my own- they were of special meaning to him- mine meant nothing at all.

I picked out a relatively inconspicuous outfit for him to wear around until we got too far south. Once we reached northern Arizona I intended to get something more appropriate for the rest of the journey.

T looked good in jeans and a hoodie, he looked younger too. It reminded me how old I was, I didn’t like the feeling very much. Finding older men at my age was getting harder and harder with each passing day. To find a man older than myself left me with two choices, marry a full-fledged demon (I do not date half demons; long story.) or marry a demi-god and or a full-fledged god. Ok, so maybe that’s three choices but I lump the last two in with each other.

The closer we got to the Mexico-Arizona border the more I wanted to just break away from T and bolt. I mean it is common knowledge that the US Border Patrol does not shoot at aliens going back into Mexico. Home was so close I could smelly the musky Mexican forest, few and far between but still there.

“T.” I turned over on the hotel bed. “Once we reach the border, if I try to run off you may want to grab my waist and not let me hurt you.”

He grabbed my waist, silently, and mumbled tiredly back, “You’re not going to leave me behind in a foreign land, dressed like an idiot, so that you can go run off to hug another man- that better not be what I’m hearing from my loving fiancée’s mouth.”

I laughed quietly, “But of course not, dear.”