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 Posted: Tue Jun 16, 2009 8:11 pm
I'll first start off the statement by saying I've been in one for about a year with no problems what so ever--but I must know, how do you all feel about it? For those who have been in them, how have your experiences been? Good or bad, I'd love to know about them personally.
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Posted: Sat Sep 12, 2009 8:28 pm
I dunno if you're still expecting answers off this, but I was going through the guilds I'm on, clearing up, and noticed this. Three months late, but better one reply hugely late than none at all, yeah?
First off, opinion. LDRs are awful when you're a physical person like me - I hate not being able to touch, see, smell even. They're also amazing when you actually meet face to face. It's totally worth the time apart when you get together.
Second, experience. It's not too good though, I warn you.
I was in a LDR for about a year and a half. Everything went amazingly well for the first... well, until he met my friends. Talking on the phone every other night and msn most days; he even managed to visit a few times. I know he's the first guy I've ever actually loved. I don't just mean some schoolkid crush (mum kept telling me that's all it was), I mean really loved.
Then, after christmas, just towards the tail end of the time, he suggested we take a "break" as he called it. A month went by, and I waited for him to tell me what he felt. Eventually I got a call to tell me he wanted to break up, he still loved me, and I wasn't to contact him again. Pretty damn mixed signals. Either way, I did as he said, confused as I was. I cried for days afterwards.
It was later I found out, by way of my best friend - he had met her on his second visit, about 4 months before the relationship ended - that he had been attempting to cheat on me. He'd hit on her(she refused his advances, much to my relief), despite the fact she wasn't only nearly six years younger than him but at the time way under the legal age here. I'd trust her with my life; she'd never lie about something like that. It tainted my views of him, and I still don't know if I can forgive him for that.
It's taken me near enough 6 months to get over the breakup, but I'm finally over it. I can smile at memories and pictures again. I don't regret anything that happened when we were dating, I just wish I'd not been as naive as I was with the whole "cheating" thing. I just always seem to pick the rotten eggs.
Clearly, we didn't remain friends. I emailed him once or twice trying to be friendly, but I wasn't even acknowledged. It's a shame, he was my best friend before the relationship.
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Posted: Wed Dec 23, 2009 2:29 pm
Well, I guess I will reply as well.
I am in a LDR which has been going on for a little more than 2 years now. We saw each other for the first time in real life this past summer, met my over protective parents, and my best friend.
At first the relationship was horrible. Despite him being 3 years older, he was not that much maturer than I, and because he did not want to grow up and other issues cause a bunch of problems, including cheating. But now we are threw it, and he understands he has to have some responsibility with his life now. Our relationship is odd, since we are both bi, and kinda flirty, so we not have an open relationship. I am jealous a bit still, so while he can do whatever he wants with his guy friends, he wont touch girls like that. But I can play with both genders, as long as it isnt serious. This makes it easier for the distance and the physical stuff, since we can talk about our adventures with other people.
It is hard at times, since people are judgmental, I tend to keep it quiet, and my parents are all in my face about it being a 3 year difference. But, I am used to being online, and I am more honest. I am quiet in real life, so my conversational skills are better online. I agree that it is horrible if you are a physical person. Most of the time, I would advice not going into a LDR if you are that kind of person, because unless the distance is like the next town over, you cant do anything about it, and it will hurt you.
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