It was a normal morning for the planet express ship crew as they sat at the meeting table. As everyone took their seats, Hermes stood up to give his report, “First the new news, would someone please stop leaving potato chip bags around the building, we are getting owls again.” Fry lets out a contented burp which sends small potato chip fragments flying on the table. Hermes gives him a sour look but moves on anyway. “With that said, I would like to congratulate Scruffy for cleaning those owl traps.” Scruff the Janitor stands off to the side leaning on the wall but remains emotionless. “Scruffy didn’t clean them traps. Scheduling conflict.” He nods once and as Hermes looks confused. “Well I didn’t clean them, then who…” Before Hermes could finish, Zoidberg burps and lets an owl feather fly out onto the table. Hermes rolls his eyes and continues. “Moving on..."
“Good News Everyone.” The professor walks into the room and shouts out. “I am still technically alive, incidentally that still requires me to make a living. So I have another package to deliver, and when I say ‘I’ I really mean you all.” Leela stands and salutes, as bender leans back in his chair. “Goody two-shoes” As he leans back he kicks her in the calf. “Ouch! Bender!” Leela then makes a round house kick to bender head sending it flying. “ouch oof Ark…Yo body over here, come get me!” Fry chuckles a bit and sits up. “So professor, where are we going? Cowboy Planet, Mob Planet? Omicron Persei 8? Will I have time to strut my stuffs to sexy alien babes?” The professor chuckles a bit. “Oh my no, nothing as exciting as that. You three will be off to Planet Flostan. Home of Roller Derbie, Laser Hockey, mpreg , and the Chili Cheese Dog. Oh my yes.” Fry stood up confused. “Um proffesor, what did you mean by…” The professor quickly interjects. “Off you go now. I have mutated chimps to tend to. Delicious diclinous mutated chimps.” He walks off licking his lips and fiddling with his fingers.
Moments later the Planet Express crew was off. Leela at the wheel, fry off to the side, and Bender walking in screwing on his head. Leela spoke up. “Ok, just a few more hundred million light years and we should arrive. I hear Flostan is nice this time of year. I would have gotten a summer vacation there too, if Nibbler hadn’t eaten my prize ticket.” Bender started laughing. “Hahahaha, serves you right. Animals are stupid but whats is more stupid is people who take care of animals, and that’s you! HAHAHA!” Leela grunts and mans the ship as Fry sits up. “So what kind of place is it? Are there sexy ladies there? Or are they the 20 tentacle kind, because my tolerance is ten tentacles…..eeeerrrr…make that 12….errr….8.” Leela adjusted herself. “No no, there aren’t space monsters there, infact, it was colonized by Earthlings in 2828. They say it is a paradise for women, so naturally there would be many of them there, but don’t think you can try hitting on them. The laws are severely strict on men….” Fry just got done taking off his shirt and was now sitting in his boxers. “Whatcha say Leela?” She let out a sigh and rolls her eye. “Nothing…..moron….”
In a few hours the ship lands. The three of them used the hover dollie to carry the large box to its destination. As they walk, Fry can’t help but to gawk at all the ladies walking around in their summer beach bikinis, each of them with a rockin body with firm abs tight legs and a fine bosoums. Leela grunts as she walks. “Fry if your going to act like an idiot, can you try and make it less obvious?” Fry doesn’t stop the gawk. “Sorry Leela, I can’t! There…is so many…I can’t….must…ask…number….and….date…there’s one…and another!” Bender, the one pushing the dollie, puffs a cigar. “You meat bags make me sick. You all shooting genetic material at each other! Its Criminal I say! But nothing a bonus in my check won’t cure. Heh heh heh.” Leela groans as she walks. “We’re almost at the building. Hey fry, can’t you be like those men there? They don’t seem to notice the women as you do. Well, from looking at them, I see why they would be unwilling to be noticed. Just look at them, they are all fat with bulging stomachs. The women here have slim pickings. Its sad really. Hey Fry! Get back over here!” But it was too late, fry had already hurried over to two ladies. Form the looks of it he was trying a pick up line, but only seconds later the ladies slapped him and made a groin shot. Leela laughed at that. “Serves him right. Maybe that will clear his head.” But only moments later the all female police arrived and arrested Fry and carted him away in a hover car. Leela and Bender rush after the car. “Hey! Wait! That’s my friend! My very stupid stupid friend!”
Later that day, Leela and Bender discover that Fry has been arrested on accusations of making vulgar actions on women. Though sounding odd, they attended Fry’s hearing. In the court house fry sits at the defendants table. The guard speaks. “All rise for the honorable Judge Helena.” They do, as the Judge arrives and takes her seat, so does everyone else. “Now, Mr. Phillip J. Fry, you are charged with making lude actions against women that may or may not have resulted in natural fornication. How do you plead?” Fry Stood. “I plead Guilty! No wait! I take that back! I plead that other one, you know, the one that doesn’t send me to jail.” The judge sits back. “Not Guilty eh? Well we have first hand accounts and eye witness testimonials stating that you worked your ‘moves’ on women. Mr. Fry, what were your intentions?” Fry sat back down. “Well a gentlemen doesn’t kiss and tell really, but if all went well maybe she and I could have gotten a room, there would be some box wine, some Barry White and maybe even some pancakes in the morning.” There was a huge gasp in the room. Then the Judge started slamming her gavel. “Order in the court! The defendant admits it! He admits to having intentions to fornicate with women.” Another large gasp and then followed by chit chatter. “Phillip J. Fry. You are found guilty! I order the punishment to..” But the judge was stopped by Leela’s interjection. “Your honor please forgive Fry. He may be an idiot but he is sort of my friend. Plus we are new to this planet. He meant no harm.” The judge slams her gavel. “Order order. You miss, if you are new to the planet then you should have read up on the laws. Men performing actions that may lead up to natural child birth are illegal and are punishable by Mpreg. Those found guilty will be injected with serum which will make them pregnant. That is the punishment for all Men!” Bender starting laughing. “Hahahaha, Fry had plans to do some poking and in the end he gets poked himself! Hahahaha! Way to take a hit to the man hood! Hahaha, Fry will be a daddy and a mommy! If he splits up, who pays alimony?! Hahahaha!” Leela interjects. “Your not helping Bender!” The judge slams her gavel. “Order in the court! The ruling stands. Guards! Seize that woman, and you, bring out the ceremonial Pregnancy Syringe.” Just as the judge said, on guard wend to restrain Leela as another brought out a giant syringe, containing serum. As it came out, other guards restrained Fry. The judge spoke once more. “Now Mr. Fry, how this will work is so. I will grip the handle and thus imprinting my genetic material into the serium, thus fertilizing you with my child. A fitting punishment for a criminal like yourself.” “Noooooo!” As the Judge made her way down, Leela fought off her guard eventurally kicking her and sending the guard to the other one holding he syringe. The two struck but sent the syringe flying in the air. “I got it!” Leela leapt for the syringe but was too late. As she gripped the handle the syringe pokes Fry’s stomach and he let out a cry. Bender then came running up to the other guards and knocked them to the side. He then picked up Leela and Fry and ran for the door. “Cheese it!” “Stop them! They haven’t been punished yet!” After being chased by an angry mob, the three make back to their ship and take off.
A few months pass and Fry is sitting on the couch of the office, resting a potato chip bag on his swollen stomach and tossing chips at a very hungry Zoidburg who tries to catch them in his mouth. As he sits, Leela comes walking up and sit next to Fry. “How are you doing there Fry? Feeling better today? Is there anything I can get you?” Fry sighs. “Naw, I am good. I think I have eaten all the raspberry and cheese sandwiches I can stand. I don’t get it still, that judge didn’t even input her DNA on to the syringe yet I still get pregnant. I don’t know what I am going to do.” Leela rests a hand on his shoulder. “It will be ok Fry, millions of women have done it before you, it shouldn’t be such a bad thing. The professor said he will even hire a good surgeon for the C-section. It’s the least he can do for his great great great great great great…” Fry Lifts a hand. “I get it. Well lets see how things turn out. I haven’t even given a name to the little trouble maker. I don’t even know what he or she will look like.” Fry starts rubbing his swollen belly just as Leela starts rubbing his preggy belly as well. “You will be a great dad/mom.” “Thanx.” Now the camera zooms in on Fry and Leela, then zooms in again to Frys Belly, then zooms in past Frys skin, then zooms in one final time to the baby in Fry’s Belly. The baby looks to be about 8 months now. It has bright orange hair and one giant eye.
Reply
