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 Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 2:21 pm
Disclaimer - For god's sake, "lifestyle" does not mean sexual orientation. That's a character trait, not a ******** lifestyle. I just use it as kind of an umbrella term to include things such as clothing and whatnot. Thanks.
So how many of you are interested in controlling the lifestyle of your sub or having your lifestyle controlled if you are a sub? Personally, I think this is the kind of thing that you'd really only come across in 24/7 or close to 24/7 D/s. Because the alternative to 24/7 is basically scene-by-scene play, in which case controlling someone's lifestyle wouldn't matter, lulz.
But in any case, let's go into exactly what I'm talking about. The main things I'm interested in are control of diet and exercise, though control of clothing comes in not too far below that. I've recently become a little more interested in 24/7 submission to my love -- or 24/7 D/s in general, since we may switch occasionally so I've got control of her. (You silly full subs and Doms wouldn't understand, but the switches would.)
So I've decided that I want to get in better shape, and I've begged my Mistress to help me. Since I tend to snack out of boredom too much, I'm going to let her know whenever I get hungry and have to ask for permission to eat. Obviously this requires trust, particularly if you have hypoglycemia or other problems which can make things more difficult. But, I know she'd never starve me or deny me food if I'm starting to get shaky and light-headed.
So I'm curious, what do you all think of this? Have you ever tried it? How did you like it? Were you the one controlling or being controlled? Or do you like living the Lifestyle one scene at a time and like being your own person outside playtime?
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 4:51 pm
It's an interesting idea, and though I don't need help with my weight (my constant guilt keeps that off) or my fashion sense (though my mother would beg to differ!), I wouldn't mind trying it. It seems like a very complete way to give up control and to submit to someone. You really have to trust a person to give them control over when, what, and how you eat, and how you dress. If you can trust your Dom, or your sub can trust you, I'd think that trying it even for a week could really refine any 24/7 D/s relationship.
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Posted: Fri Jul 24, 2009 7:16 am
My guy controls that to an extent. Truly, he's impressed I have the discipline to exercise on my own every day, but when it comes to eating right... the more stressed I am, the more I binge. He's taken to shoving me against the wall at night, hand around my throat, making me swear I won't sneak into the kitchen. (I wasn't always that bad about it-- but I've gained ten pounds since moving in with him and I hate carrying extra weight.)
As for the style aspect-- I've asked his preferences for clothing, hair, make-up and I do my best to make sure (when I go out in public with him) that I dress to please him. I've recently discovered I have a dollification fetish. That is, allowing someone to mold me to their definition of beauty. His isn't so extreme and I still follow my own likes and dislikes to a degree, with a few modifications.
I'm amused by the differences in other's visions for me, however.
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Posted: Mon Aug 03, 2009 10:28 am
I have a friend of mine who basically only wear the clothes her boyfriend picks out for her (their relationship is kinda twisted, so I'm seriously not sure who's supposed to be top there). I find it vaguely offensive, though, since it kind of sounds like he doesn't like her as he is, he's rather her dress up like something she's not.
Other than the clothes, I suppose I could kind of see diet and excise control, as long as there's some really good trust there. =3 It would probably be good for you, like having a personal trainer with you all the time.
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Posted: Tue Aug 04, 2009 11:14 am
I wish my boyfriend (My Dom) would do that for me, control my eating I mean...it'd make my need to snack less of an option for me.
One day when I was on my hardcore diet I was losing motivation to exercise that day, so I asked him if he'd tell me I'm fat and that I need to lose weight. He was unsure of himself but he did it for me, and like I knew it would, it got me rearing to go work that flab off; since I wanted to look better for him, etc.
It's weird but it works lol.
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Posted: Tue Aug 04, 2009 12:26 pm
As a once-in-a-blue-moon-submissive, (I'm thinking about copyrighting that term haha) I would like to try diet/exercise control, but I'm doubting that I'll get to.
As a fulltime Master, I would enjoy changing my sub's lifestyle for the better, healthwise, but since he's also my husband... and is a little sensitive about his belly, and since he's a lighting tech and does hard physical work most days... I don't think it's going to happen, or that it's really needed. If one day he flexes his arms and I don't go into 'ooo, muscles' seizures, then I'll know it's time to start that. biggrin
My second sub... I wouldn't go there with him yet. We still don't know each other well enough for that, even though he's the only one who could use it, out of my subs ^.^;;
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Posted: Fri Aug 14, 2009 10:45 am
I've always been a 24/7; being a slave was always more lifestyle for me than just bedroom. That part was just a gorgeous bonus.
That being said, I've had all of what you mentioned. My first serious 24/7 owner (bought me a collar, and a dogtag with his name engraved on it and everything, I loved it). I asked permission to eat, if I was going anywhere (other than school or work or other places that I had to go no matter what), I had to be accompanied and about three-quarters of the time I was leashed. He had a schedule for my exercise that I had to follow, and he even went with me when I went clothes shopping, yes. In that scenario we'd both have to come to an agreement on it, expect in certain instances where there would be an outfit he said I had to get. He also paid for those ones.
Now, luckily, he and I had a very good relationship. There was a lot of respect and compassion between us. I'm not as sure I'd suggest agreeing to that sort of lifestyle if you weren't totally sure of your owner's trustworthiness, or your own ability to commit to it (mostly to try and avoid nasty situations like abuse and things getting out of hand).
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Posted: Sat Sep 26, 2009 5:48 pm
I see nothing wrong with one partner picking out the other person's clothes esp if they dont like the other person's style clotheswise. As stated by dating experts like head of millionaire matchmaker or on sex and city clothes are easy to change just take them shopping and show them what will make them look better. Who knows sometimes the other person will like the choices made for them as much or more than choices they made themselves. Clothes are superficial. A lot of couples want to change one thing or another about their partner and because clothes for most are superficial its an easy one to make. A lot of women due it to their men too to cover for the man's bad taste.
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