As title says.

31/7/09:

I just had an arguement with my boyfriend. Im annoyed by how he barely speaks to be anymore, so I tried to tell him why im so annoyed, but I dont think he listened. I could rant about how much I hate him sometimes, but Lets not get off topic here. (Have you ever heard the song '7 things'? I guess its kinda like that. I could write down the 7 things I hate about him but I have lots of reasons why I love him). But I will tell you one thing that really bugs me. Whenever im upset, I tell him why, and instead of comforting me, he always tells me why his life is worse. Thats not very comforting. In the end, I have to talk to my friends to cheer me up, or try cheering myself up. Which usually ends up with wrist cutting. But then again, I guess its always been like that.
When I was born, the doctors said I wouldnt live longer than a week at best. It was either that, or I wouldnt be able to walk or talk. It seemed they were wrong somewhat. Sure, I was a late developer (I didnt learn how to say my own name untill I was five), but I overcame my difficulties. Sort of. Its kinda hard to say. People cant really notice, unless they know me.
Im 15, but thats not really accurate. Its only the years I have been alive for. But really, its kinda confusing. Pysically, I was an early developer (puberty started at 8-9, kicked in when i was 11-12, wtf) so I look older whan I actually am. But mentally, Im younger. Sort of, its kinda hard to explain. But thats me for you.
But even now, I really struggle to communicate. Im really slow, and I struggle to come up with the right way to respond to something. I speak too fast, and people cant understand me sometimes. So I get really annoyed becuase of that, and people get confused why im suddenly so emotional. I could go on and on, but I really cant be bothered right now, Im REALLY getting off topic.

BUT yeah, in short, my life was never really good. People dont really seem to realize that though.

((Random topic wtf. I might make more entries if anything happens. This IS a blog, after all, right? ))