No, my name is **** ********, I'm 19, have always lived in America with my wonderful parents and younger siblings, none of which know anything about Japanese culture (except what I've told them).
See, there's your problem with this fiction. I'm guessing you're going for one of those second-person stories that "put the reader directly into the action." But you're only distancing me from this story by saying I'm this person I cannot relate to in the least. What you've actually done is created an original character, and you're trying to get around saying this fiction contains an OC by saying the reader is the OC.
If your POV is going to be second person, you're going to have to write very generally. You're not allowed to describe what the person looks like, their background, or their family life. And you definitely cannot be giving your readers their own names. You'll mostly be describing the setting and actions of the other characters along with the main character's actions. Generally a second-person POV main character is introduced as such (this is an example...normally you'll want much more detail on the surroundings):
Quote:
You walk around the brightly lit shopping centre looking for the carrots your mother asked you to buy. Your family just moved here six months ago after your mother got a sweet new job offer. You've been having the usual troubles of adjusting to a new place. After all, being uprooted in the middle of high school has never been easy on anyone, and on top of the new setting, you've got a whole new culture to adjust to.
You happen upon some sweet potatoes that look paticularly good and begin to wonder if your mom would get upset if you happened to buy them instead of the carrots...
Now granted, you're still limiting your readership to a single-child, two parent family, but as the parents aren't really defined, people can usually place a figure who is like a mother or father in their places. The main character is a teenager, but age is left for anyone between 14-17. The adjustment to the culture is something everyone goes through. And with the idea that the main character has been in the new country for six months, the reader gets a choice of why they know the culture so well: either they were interested in it before, or they adjusted over the months.
You're allowed a few other things, such as saying what types of siblings your character has, pets, and a couple of likes and dislikes because people can usually identify with these in some way or another (as friends can be like siblings, and most people want or have had a pet). However, the more detail you include, the more you're limiting your readership.
Mariko Grey is too developed. If you want to write a story about her, keep her as an OC and write in some other POV. Don't try to force anyone to become this character.
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