Welcome to Gaia! ::

*#1: "Um, I think* I have another key around here somewhere..."

*#2: "Oops."

#3: "Um. You didn't really* need that, did you?"

*#4: "Which end of this thing am I supposed to put in there?"

*#5: "Don't worry. I'm sure there's a locksmith somewhere that's open at 2AM..."

*#6: "I promised not to do any permanent damage - but you know, hair grows back."

#7: "Oops. I thought* that was the lube."

*#8: "Uh oh. If that's the KY tube, what did I just put up your....."

*#9: "Did I mention we're on camera and this is going on my interactive website?"

*#10 "Safeword? Um, what's a safeword?"

*#11 "And this is my German Shepherd, Ralph. I know you'll just love Ralph."

#12 "Oh ********. You can* untie yourself from up there, right?"

*#13 "Oh s**t. You do know CPR, don't you?"

*#14 "Heh heh heh. You didn't tell anybody else you were coming here, did you?"

*#15 "I do too know what I'm doing. I've read five whole Gor novels!"

*#16 "Now, where DID I put that extra attachment for the chainsaw?"

*#17 "Uh oh. If this is the tube of Superglue, where's the KY?"

*#18 "Did I ever mention that little fantasy I have about the tennis balls?"

*#19 "Lie very, very still and keep your body temperature low. It turns me on."

*#20 "Oh, um, hello, Officer."

*#21 "My real name? It's Bates. By the way, I'd like you to meet Mother."

*#22 "No, really. Trust me. I saw this work in a movie once."

#23 "You said* you could service my p***y.....c'mere, Fluffy."

*#24 "You like my straitjacket? Cool; I'm glad they let me keep it."

*#25 "Phn'glui mgwlnath Cthulu R'lyeh."

*#26 "I did mention I was a devout worshipper of Huitzilopochtli, didn't I?"

*#27 "I did mention I was a devout worshipper of Kali-Ma, didn't I?"

*#28 "Oh mighty Azathoth, accept this sacrifice I offer to You...."

*#29 "I'm sorry. Are the voices in my head bothering you?"

*#30 "Groovy. This crop leaves colored trails in the air when I swing it."

*#31 "Well golly gee! This is more fun than pullin' the wings off-a butterflies!"

*#32 "Dang it, this is more fun than settin' cats on fire!"

*#33 "You don't need a safeword; I'm psychic. My spirit guides tell me what to do."

*#34 "You don't need a safeword; it's groovy. I'll just watch your mood ring."

*#35 "Oh, um, hi Mom. We were just, um, uh....."

*#36 "I'm not crazy. Yes I am. Shut up, all of you."

*#37 "Um, I forgot - which one of us was supposed to be the dom?"

*#38 "Heh heh. Look, Beavis, a tied up naked chick. Now what do we do?"

*#39 "I'm not really a mad scientist. I just want to see what happens."

*#40 "I promised no permanent marks, but I bet I can sew that back on."

*#41 "You don't need a safeword; I'm a True Master. I've read ALL the Gor books!"

*#42 "You don't need safewords; I'm a True Mistress. I have WEEKS of experience."

*#43 "I don't use safewords; I'm Betazoid. I look human so They won't get me. Shh."

*#44 "Uh oh. I think it's stuck there."

*#45 "I always keep the speculum in the freezer. It's more fun that way."

*#46 "If it doesn't fit, it just needs more Crisco. Where did I put that football?"

*#47 "Don't worry if your hands go numb. You won't be needing those."

*#48 "Did I mention my crucifixion fetish? Now, where did I put those nails..."

*#49 "No one understands me. That's why I killed her."

*#50 "Bye. I'm taking off for the weekend. Isn't suspension bondage fun?"

*#51 "Oops. It escaped. I think I see it slithering off in the corner."

*#52 "Darn it, where DID my pet tarantula get to?"

*#53 "Did I mention I'm a narcoleptic?"

*#54 "You know, the Marquis de Sade was a pansy."

Or 'MOM! GET OUT OF MY ROOM!'

ahhh that would suck so hard.

Agree!

Fire alarms happen at university all the time. They're always false alarms.

I found they added a certain frisson to the proceedings.

ninja