So... this thing popped back up again, I'm not sure why, so... thread! Yay! Questions and critique appreciated, as always.Plot: First off, It's important to note that this? This is a mind screw. It centers around the dying dream (well, dying story, really) of Grace Marjorie Wilhelm, who rather inadvisably borrowed money from the mob when she knew she would never be able to pay it off.
The story she tells, confusingly enough, continues on from her release from... whatever the mob is doing to her, and promptly introduces Miss Rose, who offers to buy her debt in return for something which, though it is never really explained, is probably Grace's soul.
Next up, we meet Zach and... Alice, probably. It was going to be Amy, but then I realized that she wears an Alice dress and Alice starts with "A," too, so it works fine. Anyways, Zach and Alice's mother has just died, and at the funeral, Miss Rose turns up and says that said mother, whose name is never stated has entrusted her with the kids, so she's going to take them to their new home which is, surprise surprise, also where Grace is hanging out.
Well, everything goes fine (even if it's a wee bit creepy) while they're all hanging out in a nursery, when Miss Rose announces that Alice is going to go have some sort of operation or something. Zach protests, and when he tries to go get his sister himself, Miss Rose inexplicably tells him that the hallways aren't safe, he shouldn't be going out there alone. Far from placating him, this makes him want to save her more, so off we go, with Grace and Zach. Don't ask why Grace went along. There are deliberate plot holes.
First stop, some random broom closet! Wandering through the halls, (after finding Alice) our heroes duck into a random broom closet, and what do they find, but "The Gang," a bunch of dubious allies consisting of Silvio, Ghost, and some chick who never wears clothes. Silvio flirts with Zach, Zach is clueless, Ghost never talks and only thinks in what looks like little pictures, and naked girl is just sorta being naked.
After hanging about for a while and getting some tips, our heroes wander off, only for Alice to suddenly disappear. Oops. So now they're looking for Alice.
Well, as expected, Grace and Zach proceed to get separated, and oh yeah, did I mention they're being followed by... something. Silvio assaults Zach, acting completely differently than he did, before the noise they make attracts Grace, and Silvio retreats. Hell if I know why, he could take them both out easily but again, intentional plot holes! (Grace, you suck.) If you thought the thing that was following them was Sivio, you'd be right, but it has glowy eyes and is made of shadow, so... have fun with that!
About now, we get introduced to the White Room. No, not the video game. It's really the only description I can give. It's a room, sparsely furnished, that is entirely white. At completely random moments, Grace will find herself there, wearing white scrub-like-clothes, lying on a table. She'll wander around for a while, but there's really nothing she can do there, and there's no way to get out until she "wakes up." At which point, any weapon she had got a hold of she no longer has. Fun!
See that? That's why I don't like working on this. And yes, at times, she floats. It's all part of the white-suspension-oblivion-drugs metaphor that's infecting everything.Which reminds me of the piano player. Ohgod, the piano player. eek
