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 Posted: Fri Oct 16, 2009 11:46 am
Normally I don't do poetry unless prompted, but I need to know if this is any good.
"This is it
I've made my final bet
I'm tired of sitting alone
Just playing Russian Roulette
So here it goes
The last time
I'm finished with this pantomime
Here it is
My bell I rang
Pull the trigger
Bang"
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Posted: Sat Oct 17, 2009 11:04 pm
Pretty good. Sums the feelings and situation up quite nicely. Only suggestion I can make is more simile/metaphor. Good poem nonetheless.
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Posted: Sun Oct 18, 2009 1:58 pm
O.o wow......that's really good.
It shows a lot of feeling.....
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Posted: Sun Oct 18, 2009 2:10 pm
It's really good. Like the first comment, more metaphor.
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Posted: Thu Dec 17, 2009 2:17 pm
Poke Duckie It's really good. Like the first comment, more metaphor. agreed
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