This is my process:
1) Get bored
2) Draw out design on paper
3) Make all necessary images
4) XHTML/CSS it
5) Checking to make sure it's cross browser compatible
6)Make sure it's valid.
In addition to this, i think your site should be easy and logical to navigate,
Your color combination should be complementary. Use of fonts should also go in line with the design, And i think above all , your theme matters a lot
and I'm sure that you have heard it a million times, but the best way to learn how to create stylish and attractive sites is...just to do it.
It takes time to learn what looks good and what doesn't, but you will have to develop that sense yourself. If you stick with it long enough, you will start to think in design. I know that sounds weird but it's true, you will start to imagine headers and footers, page bodies and content - but it takes time and effort.
Another thing that you will learn, is that the only standards you should care about are W3C's. Just because the rest of the web is doing the "2.0 thing" does that mean you have to. How did 2.0 get started? Someone decided to design differently then the rest of the web.
Another thing not to forget is that the web is full of resources and tutorials. You can google anything you can think of and there will almost always be a tutorial for it.
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