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 Posted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 10:27 am
 вσɴɴҽ ɴυιт, ρʀιɴcе ɖσυҳ.
ɴσυs ɴе vσυs συвʟιеʀσɴs ρɑs.
『 So, lately, Shunsuke *points to picture in post* has passed away and I've been incredibly sad.
So I'm in need of a seriously good laugh or smile. :c
And you know what? The person who can make me laugh the hardest gets a 20k prize.
Post your best GIFs, macros, funny songs, and jokes. GO! ♥
EDIT 4/1: Thank you all who participated! I am still rather down, but I'm getting over it.
Congrats to Cuppy. c: ♥ 』 vσтʀе мυsιqυе ȷσυе ρɑʀ cσеυʀ ет σʀеιʟʟеs...
qυσιqυе vσυs ɴе sσʏеz ρʟυs ιϲι ραʀмι ɴσυs.
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Posted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 10:58 am
*waits for the lame jokes to start rolling in* This might take a while...Sorry for your loss of sorts though. Jesus is my Lord ♥
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Posted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 11:09 am
вσɴɴҽ ɴυιт, ρʀιɴcе ɖσυҳ.
ɴσυs ɴе vσυs συвʟιеʀσɴs ρɑs.
『 But Naomi, lame jokes make people smile, no matter how cheesy they are! But it will take a bit...
And thanks. Baaah, this is the second time this year someone in the music scene died. It's kinda depressing. :c ♥ 』 vσтʀе мυsιqυе ȷσυе ρɑʀ cσеυʀ ет σʀеιʟʟеs...
qυσιqυе vσυs ɴе sσʏеz ρʟυs ιϲι ραʀмι ɴσυs.
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Posted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 11:13 am
 Does this count? Edit: How many tries does each person get, anyway? Jesus is my Lord ♥
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Posted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 11:19 am
вσɴɴҽ ɴυιт, ρʀιɴcе ɖσυҳ.
ɴσυs ɴе vσυs συвʟιеʀσɴs ρɑs.
『 Epic bus is epic. Now I want a bus like that. o uo
And, as many tries as they want. ♥ 』 vσтʀе мυsιqυе ȷσυе ρɑʀ cσеυʀ ет σʀеιʟʟеs...
qυσιqυе vσυs ɴе sσʏеz ρʟυs ιϲι ραʀмι ɴσυs.
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Posted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 1:05 pm
Why was the Tomato blushing? It saw the salad dressing.
O.o
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Posted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 1:23 pm
Diamond, I have no idea how to beat that...  Jesus is my Lord ♥
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Posted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 1:43 pm
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Posted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 1:53 pm
Okay, Izzy. Funny?Now that I think about it, this was not all that funny but it did make me laugh when I first read it. Go figure. Jesus is my Lord ♥
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Posted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 1:55 pm
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Posted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 4:17 pm
вσɴɴҽ ɴυιт, ρʀιɴcе ɖσυҳ.
ɴσυs ɴе vσυs συвʟιеʀσɴs ρɑs.
『 @Diamond:
What a cute joke! 4laugh
I chuckled at the nukes and flamethrower motivational posters.
But keep trying.
@Naomi: Heheheh. I laughed a bit at the screen cap. Keep trying. ♥ 』 vσтʀе мυsιqυе ȷσυе ρɑʀ cσеυʀ ет σʀеιʟʟеs...
qυσιqυе vσυs ɴе sσʏеz ρʟυs ιϲι ραʀмι ɴσυs.
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Posted: Wed Mar 31, 2010 8:09 am
How do yo know a blonde is having a bad day???
She can't find her pencil and her tampon is behind her ear....
I hope you laughed and hope you get cheered up soon Semproniana.
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Posted: Wed Mar 31, 2010 9:46 am
вσɴɴҽ ɴυιт, ρʀιɴcе ɖσυҳ.
ɴσυs ɴе vσυs συвʟιеʀσɴs ρɑs.
『 @Starwarrior: Lolz. Blonde jokes. Haven't heard that one before. *saves it*
And thanks! ♥ 』 vσтʀе мυsιqυе ȷσυе ρɑʀ cσеυʀ ет σʀеιʟʟеs...
qυσιqυе vσυs ɴе sσʏеz ρʟυs ιϲι ραʀмι ɴσυs.
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Posted: Wed Mar 31, 2010 11:47 am
NOTE:: For those of you who fall into the categories given, please do not take offense to these jokes. Thanks ^^
Blonde Jokes:
A young brunette goes into the doctor's office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it.
"Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me."
She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony. She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams and so on it goes.
The doctor says, "You're not really a brunette are you?"
She says, "No, I'm really a blonde."
"I thought so," he says. "Your finger is broken."
-.-.-.-.
Q .. What does a blonde say when you ask her if her blinker is on?
A .. It's on. It's off. It's on. It's off. It's on. It's off.
Q .. What does a blonde say if you blow in her ear?
A .. "Thanks for the refill!"
Q .. What do you call 10 blondes standing ear to ear?
A .. A wind tunnel.
Q .. What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?
A .. Pregnant.
Gay Jokes:
A man named Vinny dies and goes to hell.
The Devil says to him "Hey Vinny we've been waitin for ya!".
Vinny smiles and walks with the Devil and the Devil says "I gotta ask you a couple questions, do you like to smoke?" Vinny answers "Ya, I love to smoke." The Devil says "Good you'll like Mondays we smoke everything cigarettes, cigars, weed everything."
"Now do you like to drink?" Then Vinny says "Of course I love to drink." The Devil replies "Great we drink everything on Tuesdays you will fit in great."
"Do you like to have sex?" Vinny says "Hell ya sex is the best." The Devil smiles and replies "We have sex with every type of woman you could think of on Wedesdays."
And the Devil finally says "Now, are you gay?" Vinny frowns and answers "NO I'm not gay! And the Devil looks down and finishes "Your gonna hate Thursdays."
-.-.
The manager hired a new secretary. He was young, smart, handsome and polite.
One day while taking dictation, he noticed the managers fly was open. When he was leaving the room, he courteously said, "Oh, by the way sir, did you know that your barracks door is open?"
The manager did not understand the secretarys remark, but later on he happened to look down and saw that his zipper was open. He decided to have some fun with his new employee. Calling him in, he asked, "By the way Mr. Jones, when you saw my barracks door open, did you also see a soldier standing at attention?"
The secretary, who was also quite witty, replied, "Why no, sir. All I saw was a little, disabled veteran sitting on two duffel bags."
-.-.-.
Three friends -- two straight guys and a gay guy -- and their significant others were on a cruise. A tidal wave came up and swamped the ship; they all drowned, and next thing you know, they're standing before St. Peter.
First came one of the straight guys and his wife. St. Peter shook his head sadly. "I can't let you in. You loved money too much. You loved it so much, you even married a woman named Penny."
Then came the second straight guy. "Sorry, can't let you in, either. You loved food too much. You loved to eat so much, you even married a woman named Candy!"
The gay guy turned to his boyfriend and whispered nervously, "It doesn't look good, d**k."
Red neck Jokes
Two rednecks, Jake and Bubba, were sitting in a bar one night watching rasslin' on the tube. At the end of the match was an advertisement. A loud, obnoxious character came on screaming about the $10,000 dollars prize money for anyone who could defeat "The Killer".
Jake looked at Bubba, a 6' 4" giant with the brain the size of a pea, and got an idea. He told Bubba, "I bet you could beat that guy. He doesn't look so rough, and you're no wimp." Bubba thought about it for a minute and agreed that he probably could.
The next weekend Jake and Bubba went down to the stadium where the tournament was to be held and signed Bubba up. An old man came up and started briefing them on the rules of the contest and such. Jake, seeing Bubba was a bit nervous, asked the old man for any tips. The old man looked up to Bubba and said, "Just you watch out for his pretzel hold. Ain't nobody ever gotten out that thing."
One by one, the contestants ahead of Bubba went in and came back balled up and hurting. Two hours after they arrived, Bubba's turn was finally up. In the ring, right before the bell rang, Bubba looked back at Jake and said,
"Don't worry buddy. I can avoid that pretzel thing." But not ten seconds after he had gotten up in the ring was The Killer laying on top of the contorted ball of Bubba and the referee was pounding the mat, counting to ten.
Jake screamed and started walking back to the locker rooms. He was pissed. He had shelled out $500 to get Bubba in this contest, and it didn't last 20 seconds. But right before he got to the door, the crowd went wild! Jake ran back to the ring to see Bubba with one foot on top of the unconscious Killer and one armed raised in the air by the referee.
Jake ran into the ring and jumped on Bubba. The crowd was out of control, and Jake and Bubba were $10,000 richer!
Later in the locker room, Jake confessed to Bubba he didn't see what happened. Bubba said, "Well, The Killer got me in his pretzel hold and I thought all was lost. I hurt like I'd never hurt before and all I could hear was the ref slamming his hand down counting to ten. Then I looked and in front of me I saw this big, hairy sack of balls. I had nothing to lose
and figured it might even help. So I stretched a little further and bit down as hard as I could on those things."
"Jake," Bubba said. "You wouldn't believe the strength a man gets when he bites his own balls."
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Posted: Wed Mar 31, 2010 11:51 am
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