Could I get some constructive critism on this poem? I want to try and get it published. Thanks!
The Glass KingdomUpon the hillside
Suspended within time
Never moving forward
But never falling far behind
There is a kingdom made of glass
It sparkles in the sun
Thousands of fragile pieces
That make the rainbows run
She saw it everyday
From her nursery room
She saw it sparkle in the snowshine
And in the sun of June
She?d be happy if she?d reach it
They told her every day
If she could only touch it
It would cast her cares away
She?d get there someday
She vowed it in her soul
It sparkled, it taunted
The rainbows called her to her goal
She watched it everyday
She waited until she?d grown
In a shawl of red
She climbed the hill alone
She took the steps she needed
To reach the shining tower
With determination in her eyes
She sought the kingdom?s power
Higher and higher she climbed
Always looking up
And when she thought she?d reached it
It was always one step up
She climbed to try and touch it
But she never could quite reach
It danced out of her fingertips
A barrier she couldn?t breach
They climbed the cliff together
The kingdom and the girl
Until they reached the crest
No more up, just the world below unfurled
Her fingers touched the icy glass
It shattered at her touch
The wind blew away the kingdom
That had turned to dust
Now the little girl was old
She couldn?t climb back down
So she threw herself off the cliff
And hit the lake and drown
Reply
