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Second verse, same as the first. Will update when more info is available.

Kelly Kelly vs Brie Bella in a "******** this match, we want WWE Ice Cream" match

Big Show vs Mark Henry in a "We REEEEEEEEAAAAALLY don't know how to book our monsters" match

Smackdown MITB
Contestants: Wade Barrett, Sheamus, Heath Slater, Justin Gabriel
Daniel Bryan, Kane, Sin Cara, Cody Rhodes

RAW MITB
Contestants: Alex Riley, Alberto Del Rio, The Miz, R-Truth
Evan Bourne, Jack Swagger, Rey Mysterio, Kofi Kingston

Randy Orton vs Christian - WHC Championship in a "Fourth time's the charm" Match

John Cena vs CM Punk - WWE Championship in a "LETS GO CENA; C-M-PUNK!!!" match

EDIT: I forgot to mention this. If the winners of their respective MITB cash in that night or any other PPV night, it will not be counted towards the result. Pretty common sense, but just as a reminder.

EDIT 2: Also, I'm permitting two picks for each MITB.

Remember, be sure to have all your picks done before the start of the PPV.

Kellyx2 vs Brie
Winner: Kelly
Reason: Well for one, she's over...though who the ******** knows why...

Big Show vs Mark Henry
Winner: Henry
Reason: Right now, what they need to do is have Henry win. Big Show won't lose any credibility if he loses this match (hell, he no-selled a ******** CAR), and right now they are looking to establish Henry as a future contender.

Cena vs Punk
Winner: Punk
Reason: Out of the million odd scenarios that could possibly happen in this match, only one seems plausible. Cena's had a nagging injury and should take some time off to rest and recoup. Plus, its Chicago. CHICAGO. WHERE PUNK IS FROM. WHERE HE IS MORE POPULAR THAN CENA. Vince hates riots.

Orton vs Christian
Winner: Christian
Reason: I know, its a long shot, but come on, even creative wouldn't be stupid enough to make any of their superstars lose four in a row...right?

SD MITB
Slater and Gabriel: No. I hate to say no, but personally, they'd be better off not winning this one. They need to develop more.

Cody Rhodes: Potentially. He's my third pick for this one. He's been on a roll it seems, and getting the title might be a good thing. Hell, maybe if he wins, they'll merch the hell out of paper bag masks.

Daniel Bryan: Not likely. I hate saying this, I really do. However, I just don't see it happening.

Wade Barrett: Potentially. He's done at the top of the midcard and is looking to move into the main event scene as a heel (which is desperately needed).

Sheamus: Potentially. See Barrett.

Kane: Not likely. I think he's pretty much done with any title shots, except for potentially an intercontinental.

Sin Cara: HELL TO THE NO. That should be reason enough, but I'm legitimately worried for everyone in this match because of Sin Cara, the Living Botch-machine.

RAW MITB
Evan Bourne: Not likely. As good a push as he's getting now, he won't be getting that belt.

Jack Thwag-sorry-Swagger: No. Better heels are in this match, and he has a good feud with Bourne right now.

Rey Mysterio: Potentially. He's probably not going to win, but if there's one thing I've learned from watching WWE, don't count out Rey.

Miz and Riley: I'm putting these two together because the answer applies to both of them; Not a chance. Like with Thwagger, they are in an excellent feud right now.

Kofi Kingston: Not likely. He's stuck at the top of the midcard. While I want to see him move ahead, I don't think it'll happen.

Alberto Del Rio: Potentially. Now that he's got the Big Show off his back, he can go back to being a threat in the gray area between midcard and main event. Winning here could set him up well for SummerSlam.

R-Truth: Potentially. He's been getting a great push and seems to be doing well in his matches. I'd say he's the most likely to win.

Kelly Kelly vs. Brie Bella
Pick: Kelly...But honestly, who gives a s**t.

Mark Henry vs. Big Show
Pick: Henry...Isn't Show's leg (you know, the one that no sold a car) still ******** up?

SmackDown Money in the Bank
Pick: Sheamus...It's not going to be Slater, Gabriel, Kane, Sin Cara, Cody Rhodes, or (though, I'd really like him to win) Daniel Bryan. It's between Sheamus and Barrett, and between the two, I think Sheamus has more momentum. So Sheamus it is.

RAW Money in the Bank
Pick: Del Rio...A bit tougher. Not going to be Rey, Swagger, Bourne or Kingston. Riley and Miz are probably going to go into their own program. It's down to Truth and Del Rio. I have a theory that Truth and Punk are actually helping each other, so it would make sense for Truth to do a cash-in on Cena and have Punk help him out, but considering all the times Del Rio has been screwed over, and how they really want Cena/Del Rio at SummerSlam, I'm going Del Rio on this one.

Randy Orton vs. Christian
Pick: Christian...Because they can't possibly have Christian lose four ******** times in a row to this a*****e. His career would be just as over as Edge's....So watch Orton win this one. ******** p***k. I think my only hope is that they add Sheamus to the match so that Christian has someone to beat for the title.

John Cena vs. CM Punk
Pick: Punk...Probably the hardest one of all. In fact, it'd be easier to call if Punk were staying. But considering what can happen on this night, Punk could actually walk away the champ. Not leave the company with the belt, obviously, but have him lose it either that night or on the next night. Or maybe he doesn't leave. Maybe he cuts a promo mocking the fans the next night, talking about how easy it was to get them to turn away from Cena, as he did do that for a period in his segment with Vince. Either way, in such a hostile crowd as Chicago...do they really want to start that riot? ...Probably, so watch Cena win this one...

Just reading some recaps, Ho...Ly...s**t. Seems like I need to watch this PPV.

...

NOPE!