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what feelings do you use for your poetry, or rhymes?
  happiness.
  sadness.
  anger.
  boredom.
  hyperness!!
  woo hoo 10 gold!!
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jario maon
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PostPosted: Fri Feb 10, 2006 1:34 pm


Hello all and welcome to the Poems, Rhymes, and Songs thread!
this is a place where you can post your poems/songs/rhymes,
or comment on others.

I know we got some talent in this guild, show it! And just to show you that I am not just looking to be mean and not post, here's one of my poems.

Rules

Only one.

DON'T FLAME PEOPLES' ART!!! If you don't like what they put down keep it to yourself. The creators of the poetry, songs, and rhymes have probably put a lot of effort into their work so show some respect for them.
(Not to seem like an a** or anything.)

However, I find that artists get better when they recieve constructive criticism. That means that you don't just flame the person about how horrible their art is, you instead tell them what could use a little work, including telling them where they've made spelling and gramatical errors unless the author intended to be that way. I've not done anything to the poem below because I don't know if this was what the author intended. There are, however, grammatical errors in this poem concerning spelling and capitilization. I did not write this poem.

Kenocka



lifeless and cold.

lifeless and cold you lie on the floor.
eyes stare cold and dark at the sky.
are you going to heaven?
are you going to hell?
currently you are stuck in your cold lifeless shell.
trying to escape but finding no relief,
attempting to fight off this current worlds deciet.
what went wrong?
was your death in vane?
why is it when your dead,
you still fell all of the pain?
and now your tethered,
your bound to this woeful world.
left to watch as what could've been be not.
the only thing that belonges to you.
you cold lifeless body that has been left to rot.
as time passes by,
your soul becomes restless,
forgetting the very cause of your demise.
now you wonder aimlessly searching for answers,
haunting the reason that you so despise.
a new world now old,
your body lifeless and cold.
spread on the floor forgotten and bare.
anger and hatred fuel your restless soul,
death only comes to those most unaware.
you cling to life so?
why have hate for the living?
let your self go,
be willing and giving.
give me your sorrow your hate and your pain,
and then to you true bliss shall thou gain.
leave this world behind and your body so cold.
leave behind what was new that has now become so old.
as you lie one the floor.
lifeless and cold, you notice that to the devil you have sold your soul.
but a "man" of his word.
and his word he has kept.
once a restless soul, for eternity you have slept.
only to return to life.
and now instead of you lieying dead on the floor,
you watch as your friend lie there lacking of life.
PostPosted: Fri Feb 10, 2006 1:59 pm


ooooh nice blaugh 3nodding
something from english class... -.- and i didnt feel like listenin to her. xp

In a time where heaven shined
The gruelling evil lingered but tended to die
A sound of guardian wings, that slice through the air
Resounding talons unsheath in silence, showing no care
A clash of adversarys, the explosion of hate
Feathers fly through the breeze still carrying grace
The falling of an angel sighs with the wind
Releasing a bind that was in a subconscious mind

Krimson Shadows
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PostPosted: Fri Feb 10, 2006 2:02 pm


Krimson_Shadows
ooooh nice blaugh 3nodding
something from english class... -.- and i didnt feel like listenin to her. xp

In a time where heaven shined
The gruelling evil lingered but tended to die
A sound of guardian wings, that slice through the air
Resounding talons unsheath in silence, showing no care
A clash of adversarys, the explosion of hate
Feathers fly through the breeze still carrying grace
The falling of an angel sighs with the wind
Releasing a bind that was in a subconscious mind

nice...although I'm really not much of a writer...the only good one I have (which still isn't really good...) is one I wrote at my bro.'s appartment (you should remember it jeremy, cuz you were there that night)...-.-
PostPosted: Fri Feb 10, 2006 2:15 pm


ooooh i would like to reads that 3nodding hmmm meh * ish semi bored*

There are times when i feel somber,and everything is only too pointless
When I sleep I feel it tearing at my soul
Memories drif before my eyes, then dissapear before ever seen
Blind to the visons that stand before me
Only to experience this life day by day
Never to know what will ever happen
But always stumbling over what i have done
_________________________________________
Will i ever get my condolence for the life i have been given
Or will i be derided for all this uncureable eternty
The corrosive effect of time can take its hold, hollowing me out, making me cold
So many reprisals that i have made, the lives that i dearly crave
only to stultify my mind that lingers in no land of mine
I am no longer the ingenous child that you once knew
but an apathy, obsolete to the world today that was once due
my animosity of the recaltrant people of this earth consumes me to the soul
now it has taken its toll
__________________________________________

aaaannd... eh makes it easier => http://www.gaiaonline.com/journal/index.php?mode=view&p=2914947 sweatdrop

Krimson Shadows
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jario maon
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PostPosted: Sat Feb 11, 2006 5:36 am


very nice krimson! me likes alot!

and david you should post taht one! you would be suprised at how many people would really lke it.
I was surprised taht people actually liked some of my stuff in the gaian haven guild but htey did and they also posted some really good poems, songs (although there where not very many rhymes...)
so hopefully we have more luck with this guild posting some rhymes.
PostPosted: Sat Feb 11, 2006 12:57 pm


merci boucoup biggrin

Krimson Shadows
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PostPosted: Sat Feb 11, 2006 1:03 pm


....yeah I suppose
PostPosted: Sat Feb 11, 2006 1:08 pm


pwease posts it ..with a bloody cherry ontop

Krimson Shadows
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PostPosted: Sat Feb 11, 2006 1:16 pm


Mmmm bloody cherries...Okies then, when I have more time (tomorrow) I will...but only cuz you's meh kitty ^.^
PostPosted: Sun Feb 12, 2006 12:21 pm


yay blaugh *huggles*

Krimson Shadows
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 13, 2006 7:52 pm


...hehe
PostPosted: Wed Feb 15, 2006 8:16 am


???

my mind paces as my body stays still.
constantly wanting, anticipating the next thrill.
adrenalin! it screams, Give it to me now.
slowly I rise, than fall to the ground *POW*
on the floor lifeless and soaked in my own blood,
was this the thrill? is this good enough?
no, say's my mind, No I need more.
that is still not the rush that I am looking for!

your pain is my pleasure,
your sorrow is my joy,
now go into the wolrd of pain,
hurt youself my toy!

as I slowly rise from the floor where I lay,
the crowd that surrounded quickly rushes away.
afraid, shocked, and fairly unnerved,
but I just walk on, completly undisturbed,
walking through life with a mind cracked in twain,
always looking, always searching for new pain.

"why can't I die?
why must I live?
"you will never die,
untill permision to you I give"

A gun? no
A knife? No!
a random blunt object to deliver a devistating blow?

i wish I could die but my mind will not let me,
it continues to watch me writh in pain, with glee.
it tourtures me so, it wont let me rest.
in my mind it is laughing, putting me through a test.

"NO MORE!!!" I say
"NO MORE OF THIS s**t!!!"
"I HAVE PUT UP WITH THIS FOR TOO LONG!!"
"I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF IT!!!"

I go to grabb a blade but it continues to push away,
I go to pound my head on the ground but it feels as soft as air.
"WHY DO YOU TAUNT ME?!
DO YOU FIND THIS FUNNY?!!
I'LL FIND A WAY TO END THIS!
SOMEHOW, SOMEWHERE!!!"

an eternity has slipped by and I continue to live,
"i give up, i dont care"
i tried every thing but it all is the same,
this is all just a part of my minds perverted game.
"sleep, sleep, go and sleep,
and hopefully while I slumber, death will come creep"

I rest in my bed and suddely wake,
suddenly I rellized my "non-fatal" mistake.
and as I thought, I began to cry,
I pick up my pen and write,
"this life is a lie"

(END)

jario maon
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Krimson Shadows
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 15, 2006 1:56 pm


... lovely 3nodding
PostPosted: Wed Feb 15, 2006 4:19 pm


yeah, nice..

vampiric kitsune malechi
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jario maon
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PostPosted: Sun Feb 19, 2006 3:01 pm


DAMNIT DAVID POST YOURS!!!!!!!!!!
NOT ONLY AM I WAITING FOR IT BUT YOUR KITTY IS TOO!!!

sweatdrop eh heh... kinda let that slip... oops.
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