This is a story about... well, actually the prologue says quite a bit by itself.
This whole story is actually a prologue for the series that comes after it.
It's setting the setting. Haha, no pun intended. xd Actually, scratch that, pun totally intended. xd
Anyways, here we go:
Quote:
WYLION
- Prologue -
A Quick Note on How Things Work In My World (And Yours As Well, Come To Think of It)
-------
Brace yourself. I'm about to tell you something you probably haven't heard before.
Gods are real.
Yes, yes, I know. You don't believe me. You think you've heard this before? Wrong. Not like I'm about to tell it to you. You think I'm just talking about Greek, Roman, or Egyptian gods? Wrong again. I'm talking about any god that has ever been created and believed in by many humans at once. So that all powerful super-god that Christians talk about? He's real. The Greek King of the gods, Zeus, and Roman counterpart, Jupiter? (Both are separate beings by the way.) They're real too. They're all real.
My name's Stephanie. Stephanie "Stephie" Marks. I'm your normal average girl, with shoulder-length brown hair, one blue eye and one hazel eye, I’m way too skinny, and I’ve got a cynical, sarcastic, and downright black humored streak that's a billion miles long (and more). It takes a hell of a lot of patience to be like me and yet still be willing to save the world/universe/basically-everything-in-existence from all of the weirdo gods out there who regularly go about trying to rule it.
Yeah, good luck with that.
The saving the world part just comes with the job - the "All-Services-of-Any-Type-for-Gods" job. Yeah, I work a job that's very, shall we say, diverse. It would take ages to tell you of all the times I've saved the world; I'm not going to try. But I will tell you about some of my more trying lets-go-save-the-world-on-a-pegasus-with-a-lollipop-fetish-and-hope-we-don't-die exploits. Yes, most pegasi have lollipop fetishes. These are the kinds of things I have to deal with on a regular basis – yay.
Egyptian gods, Norse gods, Celtic gods, Greek, Roman, heck, even Chinese and Japanese gods too, which is really saying something, since Japanese people consider any being more powerful than them-selves to be a god.
And don't even get me started on the heroes.
You see, the gods (of just about everything) don't like humans knowing about them. Conceited, I know (after all, we're the whole reason they're even here), so much so, in fact, that they all made me a non-mortal (not immortal), and so basically, I live longer than most. The difference between this and immor-tality, is that I can still die, I’ll just end up coming back – and I don’t “live forever” – only for as long as I’m needed (by the gods). Suffice to say, I won't be dying anytime soon. Great. Lucky me.
How many gods are there, you ask?
No clue. Go ask the director of this film – can’t find him? Great, neither could I. And I’m the main actor.
Still, back to the question of how many gods there are, I’d have to say, for lack of anything more specific, that the answer is waaaaay over the highest sector of whatever number line you’re using.
Think about it - every god ever thought up in every civilization ever to be in our “oh so wonderful” little universe. (Note the quotation marks, people.)
Yes, universe. No, I am not kidding. I even have to deal with alien gods at times. Luckily, God Almighty, Creator of Heaven and Earth (the existence of the former being debatable) and everything else too - yeah, that dude doesn't bother me much. And when he does, it's usually because he needs me to push some random dude in the right direction so that everything runs straight.
And there are times when just one person holds the possibility of totally messing up the big-universe-of-universes that we all live within, inside our little dimensional potholes.
Oh, yes, did I mention that there are other dimensions? Yeah, and there are gods in those dimensions as well. Funny (not really) how all of this works out - it doesn't happen often (‘cause the reception is really bad), but there are times when I've got to deal with other worldly gods What’s funny is that I’m the only one any of them are allowed to call.
Laughing yet? Good, don’t start.
But wow, I've really gotten off track here. Let’s start at the beginning of how all of this ended up hap-pening in the first place, shall we? (No, I do not mean my birth – even you have better things to do then listen to all the tales of my heroic wailing for a binky to chew on at the age of one – I blessed my parents with that particular complaint so many times, it’s not even worth mentioning.)
How much you wanna bet that you won’t bother finishing this book?
Kudos for those who do finish. Seaweed for the deserters.
And a smack upside the head for anybody who couldn’t be bothered to pick this book up to begin with – make sure it hurts, guys.
--Stephie
[End of Prologue]
- Prologue -
A Quick Note on How Things Work In My World (And Yours As Well, Come To Think of It)
-------
Brace yourself. I'm about to tell you something you probably haven't heard before.
Gods are real.
Yes, yes, I know. You don't believe me. You think you've heard this before? Wrong. Not like I'm about to tell it to you. You think I'm just talking about Greek, Roman, or Egyptian gods? Wrong again. I'm talking about any god that has ever been created and believed in by many humans at once. So that all powerful super-god that Christians talk about? He's real. The Greek King of the gods, Zeus, and Roman counterpart, Jupiter? (Both are separate beings by the way.) They're real too. They're all real.
My name's Stephanie. Stephanie "Stephie" Marks. I'm your normal average girl, with shoulder-length brown hair, one blue eye and one hazel eye, I’m way too skinny, and I’ve got a cynical, sarcastic, and downright black humored streak that's a billion miles long (and more). It takes a hell of a lot of patience to be like me and yet still be willing to save the world/universe/basically-everything-in-existence from all of the weirdo gods out there who regularly go about trying to rule it.
Yeah, good luck with that.
The saving the world part just comes with the job - the "All-Services-of-Any-Type-for-Gods" job. Yeah, I work a job that's very, shall we say, diverse. It would take ages to tell you of all the times I've saved the world; I'm not going to try. But I will tell you about some of my more trying lets-go-save-the-world-on-a-pegasus-with-a-lollipop-fetish-and-hope-we-don't-die exploits. Yes, most pegasi have lollipop fetishes. These are the kinds of things I have to deal with on a regular basis – yay.
Egyptian gods, Norse gods, Celtic gods, Greek, Roman, heck, even Chinese and Japanese gods too, which is really saying something, since Japanese people consider any being more powerful than them-selves to be a god.
And don't even get me started on the heroes.
You see, the gods (of just about everything) don't like humans knowing about them. Conceited, I know (after all, we're the whole reason they're even here), so much so, in fact, that they all made me a non-mortal (not immortal), and so basically, I live longer than most. The difference between this and immor-tality, is that I can still die, I’ll just end up coming back – and I don’t “live forever” – only for as long as I’m needed (by the gods). Suffice to say, I won't be dying anytime soon. Great. Lucky me.
How many gods are there, you ask?
No clue. Go ask the director of this film – can’t find him? Great, neither could I. And I’m the main actor.
Still, back to the question of how many gods there are, I’d have to say, for lack of anything more specific, that the answer is waaaaay over the highest sector of whatever number line you’re using.
Think about it - every god ever thought up in every civilization ever to be in our “oh so wonderful” little universe. (Note the quotation marks, people.)
Yes, universe. No, I am not kidding. I even have to deal with alien gods at times. Luckily, God Almighty, Creator of Heaven and Earth (the existence of the former being debatable) and everything else too - yeah, that dude doesn't bother me much. And when he does, it's usually because he needs me to push some random dude in the right direction so that everything runs straight.
And there are times when just one person holds the possibility of totally messing up the big-universe-of-universes that we all live within, inside our little dimensional potholes.
Oh, yes, did I mention that there are other dimensions? Yeah, and there are gods in those dimensions as well. Funny (not really) how all of this works out - it doesn't happen often (‘cause the reception is really bad), but there are times when I've got to deal with other worldly gods What’s funny is that I’m the only one any of them are allowed to call.
Laughing yet? Good, don’t start.
But wow, I've really gotten off track here. Let’s start at the beginning of how all of this ended up hap-pening in the first place, shall we? (No, I do not mean my birth – even you have better things to do then listen to all the tales of my heroic wailing for a binky to chew on at the age of one – I blessed my parents with that particular complaint so many times, it’s not even worth mentioning.)
How much you wanna bet that you won’t bother finishing this book?
Kudos for those who do finish. Seaweed for the deserters.
And a smack upside the head for anybody who couldn’t be bothered to pick this book up to begin with – make sure it hurts, guys.
--Stephie
[End of Prologue]
Yeah, that's it. Short, isn't it? sweatdrop
Yeah, a lot of my chapters are fairly short. My brain probably can't handle making it much longer. burning_eyes xd
Hoping for some constructive criticism. wink
~Izzy 3nodding
