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 Posted: Fri Jan 13, 2012 1:18 pm
Morning Glory's cheeks and nose were a little flush as she floated over another glass of champagne to herself and sipped. Noel's baby shower was going so well and everyone was having a good time. Despite the rocky relationship she and the Pegusus had, she was really very happy for Noel having little ones and getting hitched to Negative. Glory sighed wistfully. She'd like to get married some day or have some foals of her own. The unicorn consumed more light gold beverage.
A yelp made her jeweled eyes swing over to a group of phonies. TACO was trying to interject himself into a group of chatting mares, who were busily and politely trying to shoo him away. Glory's nose crinkled and she tromped over to TACO and the mares. Her glass of champagne floated after her.
"Why don't you go raise the kids you GOT before you try and make more!" She slurred this a little as she said this. The other mares exchanged awkward glances with each other before using the chance to slink away.
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Posted: Fri Jan 13, 2012 1:35 pm
"Ladies, ladies, come back! Don't listen to her; TACO can get down without without introducing any new products to the Phony brand!" he called after the mares. It wasn't working. They were a bunch of cruel harpies to leave him like that. TACO turned around and faced Glory. She just scared off his party for the night. What a buzzkill.
"Listen, lady, just because you're unlucky in the love department doesn't mean you need to ruin my chances. Unless, you're willing to take their place. But how you're going to clone yourself a bunch of times to make up for all of them, I'm not sure." TACO thought about it more, "Would that be incest if you made sexytimes with your clone? If I cloned myself, and we made out, would that make me gay? I'm too pretty to do anything other than love the ladies...it's my purpose in life..."
TACO rambled and talked to himself, and forgot that Glory was even there as he considered the true moral ramifications of cloning.
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Posted: Fri Jan 13, 2012 2:07 pm
Glory's jaw dropped a little and her cheeks reddened even more in anger. How DARE he say that she was unlucky in the love department! She just hadn't found the right stallion is all and if they were anything like TACO she'd rather be single anyway!! But was really galling her that he was just rambling on and on and totally ignoring her.
"DO YOU EVER LISTEN TO YOURSELF!" she nearly shrieked, her volume control weakened by her intoxication. "No wonder you can't get any mares! I bet...I bet you haven't even BEEN with a mare! I..I bet NEGATIVE has had more tail then you!!" Glory took a large mouthful of her drink.
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Posted: Fri Jan 13, 2012 2:27 pm
All TACO heard was the screeching of a large, angry, predatory bird. And a very insulting bird at that!
"WHAT?!" was his witty comeback. He grabbed the drink from Glory's mouth and dumped it on the ground. "You are cut off. You've partied way too hard to think that TACO hasn't been with a lady. I've been with lots of ladies. More ladies than you can count! Unless you can count to over a million-billion! But I bet you can't, smarty-pants!"
Not only were her comments insulting to him, but there were also insulting to his bro, Nega. TACO was sure that Nega was a real stallion and had been with tons of women before Noel. That's what makes men men and not little girls.
He calmed down some, and then continued, "Clearly, you must have been talking to someone else, because I'm too pretty for you to not want to throw yourself at me. You have an odd way of showing it though.... In the land your family comes from, is shouting how they initiate the mating rituals? Because I accept, baby."
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Posted: Fri Jan 13, 2012 2:53 pm
Glory's mouth dropped and she made a sort of strangled noise trying to come up with words to launch at this..this...sorry excuse for a phony in front of her.
"Smarty Pants HA! You would have to get IN my pants to know how smart they are! This from a phony who can't even READ! And I say PHONY because I have yet to see any proof you are any kind of stallion at all! You wear more make up and take better care of your hair then any mare I know!!" She looks down mournfully at the drink he dumped out on the grass, then glares up at him.
"Mating ppfftt..I doubt you know what goes where!! I've yet to meet a phony who admits to touching you! You had to have your DNA extracted to even HAVE kids!"
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Posted: Sat Jan 14, 2012 8:06 am
The last comment was a bit of a sore spot with TACO. Sure, he liked having babbies; they were great for picking up chicks. He just wished they had come about the "natural way". IE: He wanted to bang Scent Puff, and she wanted nothing to do with him. It was a little bit of a strike to TACO's ego, but he was working on her. She'd come around.... eventually.... maybe....
"Let me break it down for you. I. Am. A. Rock. God. I am the most beautiful stallion, and, yes, more well groomed than any mare. Mere mortals can only hope to look this good once in their lives, but TACO looks this good every day.
I don't need to read words, because I only speak the language of love. Your lips are telling me "no", but your body is screaming, "yes, yes, yes". And if you would stop being so difficult, I can make your mouth change it's mind, baby.
And when it's all done, we can sit by the fireplace and watch Hugh Grant movies while only slurred words of pleasure hangover are spoken."
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Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2012 2:42 pm
Glory stared and stared stared and stared at TACO in silent awe. He was serious! He actually believed all of his own babble! He actually believed he'd was such stud. The ends of her mouth turned up and laughter started bubbling up. The unicorn started to laugh. Wow, such a moron!
"Ah..hahahahahahahahahahahaa! Oh..wow..you just...you're so..."
The liquor coursing her system was making her more giggly when normally she would have never let these kind thoughts make her laugh out loud in the first place. Her eyes were glittering with drunken amusement.
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Posted: Sat Feb 18, 2012 7:27 am
TACO used this as his moment to strike. He rushed at Glory, and wrapped his front legs around her neck. Slowly then, he rested his lips against her skin and whispered in a far, far too intimate voice, "I'm just so.... what? Amazing? Awesome? Charming? Dashing? Sexy?" Between each word, TACO landed a soft kiss on her neck.
He withdrew and stared at her. "Like I said, I speak the language of love. My body is like a Rosetta Stone. Inspect it to decipher what I mean."
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