But every now and then, I come across a gem of a film that really affects me pretty profoundly. I recently viewed a film called Lilja 4-Ever, and...well, it hit pretty close to home for me. It's about a Russian girl whose other abandons her when she's 16 to America with her new boyfriend, promising that she'll send Lilja money and eventually a ticket to the States to join her and her boyfriend. But the money and the ticket never come, and even Lilja's best friend betrays her and tells their social circle that she's been prosituting herself. This leaves Lilja with one friend, a boy of maybe 12 or so, whose father frequently "goes crazy" and kicks him out of his home, so he and Lilja spend much of their time together. Eventually out of pure desperation for money when her electricity and heat are turned off and she's run out of food, she does end up going to a nightclub a few times and accepting money in exchange for sex. When she's walking home from one such encounter, a handsome, charming man offers her a ride home, and she reluctantly accepts. This man seduces her, and convinces her to move to Sweden with him, promising her a new job and a new life with him. She ignores the warnings of Volodja, her young friend, that this man was just trying to trick her into bed with him, or worse.
She flies to Sweden alone (her "boyfriend" made up some excuse about having to visit his ill grandmother and promised to join her in a few days), and is met with her "boyfriend's" boss, who drives her to a barren flat and tells her that he'll be by tomorrow morning to pick her up for work, then locks the door from the outside. And thus Lilja is forced into the grim world of human trafficking and forced prostitution. Back in Russia believing he no longer has any reason to live with Lilja gone, Volodja kills himself with a fistful of pills. I won't ruin the ending.
I'm not sure why this particular film affected me to profoundly. I know that this sort of stuff goes on, and I don't want to say that I've been de-sensitised to the plight of these women and boys who are manipulated and forced into being sex workers, but I mean...I've had some up-close-and-personal experience with the sorts of people who exploit the desperation and naiveté of young people. I think it had something to do with the fact that I saw not only myself in the main character, but also several people very close to me. I guess it just hit very close to home for me.
This one bit of dialogue really touched me.
Lilja 4-Ever
Lilija: Now I'm jumping...I'm flying.
Vlodja: No, you can't...
L: Why not? It's up to me. I've had it with this life. It's complete s**t.
V: No, it's not.
L: Course it is. It's s**t.
V: No, it's not.
L: Course it is.
V: But it's the only one you've got. This life is the only one you've got.
L: I don't want this life. I'm not interested.
V: Look at me. I killed myself and went to heaven, and yeah, it's really good in heaven. But I regret it, 'cause I wanted to live on earth a little longer. You remain dead for all eternity, but you're only alive for a brief moment. I wasn't ready yet.
L: Not ready?
V: Remember that time when we sat on the bench, and you wrote "Lilja 4-ever"? And those assholes that spat at us? I said that we should leave, but you said that you weren't ready. You wanted to finish writing first. Do you remember? That's how it is now. Everyone's spitting at you, but you're not ready. Jump if you want. It's not dangerous. I'll catch you. But then you lose. And the assholes that spit at you win. You see?
Vlodja: No, you can't...
L: Why not? It's up to me. I've had it with this life. It's complete s**t.
V: No, it's not.
L: Course it is. It's s**t.
V: No, it's not.
L: Course it is.
V: But it's the only one you've got. This life is the only one you've got.
L: I don't want this life. I'm not interested.
V: Look at me. I killed myself and went to heaven, and yeah, it's really good in heaven. But I regret it, 'cause I wanted to live on earth a little longer. You remain dead for all eternity, but you're only alive for a brief moment. I wasn't ready yet.
L: Not ready?
V: Remember that time when we sat on the bench, and you wrote "Lilja 4-ever"? And those assholes that spat at us? I said that we should leave, but you said that you weren't ready. You wanted to finish writing first. Do you remember? That's how it is now. Everyone's spitting at you, but you're not ready. Jump if you want. It's not dangerous. I'll catch you. But then you lose. And the assholes that spit at you win. You see?
Anyway, have you ever had an experience like this? Have you seen any films that really got under your skin and had a profound emotional effect on you, or do you just see films as cheap entertainment and a way to kill a few hours? Any recommendations?
