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It's midnight, so I'm posting cause it's monday.

Already gotta bump one of the random ones I picked out of this lulz book, which would have been hilarrrrriooousss... but it invoked Venus - which is against the rules.

BACK TO RANDOM DRAW:

DAMNIT AGAIN!

Another lulz spell which invokes another goddess Isis. Ok... give me a minute.

Ok, so after spending the last 30 minutes finding a few serious spells that actually are somewhat worthwhile, I finally found one that was just lulz enough to show what I've been viewing for a while now. I figured I deserved to give ya'll one that was at least somewhat hilarious because of the hype.

Author: Sister Moon
Title of Source: The Wiccan Book of Rites and Rituals
Spell Name: U B Fun at the BBQ [yes.... that is the title]

I am writing this spell as written. I am however modifying the spacing to make it more readable.

Magickal Intention: To be the life of the party. This spells works very well for the shy and inhibited.

Time: Full Moon in July, Mercury hour (she explains these hours in the front of the book)

Tools:

2 Large Yellow Candles
2 Large Orange Candles
Merry Meet oil
Friendship incense
A lemon
A punch bowl
crackers and cheese
A Cup of Cooked Mushrooms
Jar of pimentos
Cherry 7-Up
Hawaiian Punch

Instructions:

Anoint all four candles with Merry Meet oil. Light the candles and the incense.

Rub the inside of the punch bowl with the half of lemon and recite the incantation twice.

Slice the cheese and put it on the crackers. Recite the incantation over the mushrooms and pimentos and add them to the cheese and crackers. Pass the punch bowl and the snake you've make through the incense smoke. Recite the incantation one last time.

Pour the Cherry 7-UP and the Hawaiian Punch into punch bowl. Slice the remaining lemon half and hang the slices on the outsides of the bowl.

Leave the candles lit throughout the party.

Incantation:

I cast a spell for my pleasure,
Sipping brew with guests of measure.
Laughter gathers wherever I stand,
For I am on stage and you're my fans.
Applause I see and I shall receive,
All the attention that I need.
Parties of parties, for I am the light,
All of your smiles are my delight.
So Mote It Be.

Note:

This author does not actually include ANY instructions in ANY of her books about ANY of the oils that are involved in ANY of the spells that she creates. After googling for the "Merry Meet Oil" (because let's face it I was curious) I found that the exact phrase is only found in her other books on spell casting.

One of her reviewers even said as much.

Author: Leanna Greenaway

Title of Source: Practical Spell Craft: A first course in magic

Spell Name: To improve concentration (page 162)

Day: Begin on a Wednesday
Moon Phase: Waning
Candle Color: Yellow or White as an alternative
Spell must be performed each day for nine day

Spell:

Bless and inscribe your candle with "To Improve concentration"

Add Your name

Anoint the candle in the usual way

Place the candle in the center of your pentagram

Say your protection prayer for Wednesday

Recite the following chant nine times:


On the ninth repetition add "So mote it be"

Let the candle burn down and out

Wait what?

The first book I wanted to use wont really work as every spell involved citing the names of angels or "goddess of X". Which was a bit of a disappointment as I thought that just maybe there would be something I could use in that book.

YES, Yes you did.