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 Posted: Tue Jul 09, 2013 2:58 pm
 Things had been quiet lately, but the again the beach was always quiet. It was the reason why when Aquitaine decided to move away from her parents home that she choice to simply move further down the beach. Why enter the more chaotic part of the world when all she needed and wanted was right here? And yet recently Aquitaine had been restless, not even the beach and it's lapping waves could sooth her. She hadn't been sleeping much, mostly because she had too much to think about, too much she wanted to do to truly be able to rest. It had been hard keeping it all tucked inside and sooner or later Agave would question her odd behavior. Her mate knew her well enough to know that something was bothering her and while he hadn't said anything yet she knew it would only be a matter of time before he did.
It would be best if she just went and told him what was on his mind. She should have done so sooner, but uncertainty nagged at her. Aquitaine had done so little in her life so far that making a decision such as this was huge and it scared her. She stepped into the water, letting the low waves wash up over her knees seeking their calming affect. But it didn't help much.
Aquitaine lowers her head, not low enough that the waves would touch her nose, and closed her eyes. Taking in a deep breath the scent of salt water filled her nostrils. This solidified her resolve. The beach may be her home yet something else was calling out to her, something stronger than the sand and the waves and her family. She had to do this. Letting out the breath she had been holding Aquitaine slowly turned and began to head up the beach. No more delays, it was time to talk to Agave and tell him finally what was on her mind and what had been plaguing her thoughts and causing her to act not like herself lately.
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Posted: Fri Jul 12, 2013 1:33 pm
 Agave had not wandered very far down the beach - it was rare these days that he did. Excepting for the times when the worry of his mothers anger crept into his mind and sent him on quick scouting missions the green stallion found that the shoreline was all the land he required. The beach had food and water and Aquitaine...and beyond those things the stallion needed nothing in order to be happy.
Happy.
It was such a strange an unusual thing, an emotion he was still getting used to..along with Peace..and quiet..and warmth. So many things that were not quite new and yet the stallion reveled in them as though he had just discovered them the day before. He was grateful for this second chance and determined not to mess it up. Agave was no longer the stallion he had been..oh he still took care of himself, still ensured that the beach was safe from danger and that he could..if needed..if he absolutely had to..fight something off. But he had adopted a new outlook on life, a peaceful outlook and was determined to stay as far away from violence and the viciousness of his old life as he could. His mother would be so very unsettled by his new pacifist like outlook but Agave no longer cared what she thought and aside from the small pricks of fear he still experienced when he recalled her she was not a factor in his life. He spent a great deal of time praying that she never would be again.
Breathing in a deep breath the stallion let his eyes drift close, not to sleep..but merely to bask, almost meditating in the warmth of the sunlight to the soothing sound of the waves.
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Posted: Fri Jul 12, 2013 1:46 pm
She hadn't walked more than a little bit away from the waves when she noticed Agave's green form laying in the sand in the disance. He stood out like a beacon among the tan background of sand. Aqutiaine stopped and stood there for a moment, Aquitaine felt a smile cross her lips as she looked towards her mate, who looked so peaceful and relaxed laying there. To think that when he had first arrived he would never had done anything like this, he had been too set in his ways back then and it had taken both of them a lot of time and effort to chance his way of thinking. The old Agave was gone, parts of him might still be buried deep inside, but this new Agave was what she had seen that second time they met, though it had, at the time, been hidden by his old self. She had seen that potential and never turned her back on it.
The longer she stood there the more she wondered what his reaction would be. Her words would surely shatter the peace he was feeling right now. Or would it? Aquitaine gave her head a shake, he would support this decision of hers because he loved her just as much as she loved him. Confident that the outcome out go exactly how she would want it to go Aquitaine crossed the beach while mentally rehearsing her speech about how this was important to her, how she had to do it and how it was the right thing to do.
By the time she finally reached him she had everything she had wanted to say in the right order and was ready to deliver her speech. But he looked so comfortable there, even though she could tell he wasn't asleep, Aquitaine didn't really want to disturb him. He will understand, she told herself and opened her mouth. "Agave." That one word, that single little word, came out so much more quiet and hesitant that she had planned and in that moment Aquitaine nearly lost all her resolve, so she ended up just standing there and waiting for him to reply.
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Posted: Fri Jul 12, 2013 2:02 pm
Aquitaine was not noisy in her approach and the sand dulled the small sounds she did make..still Agave knew when she came close, sensed her presence as though recognizing the return something within himself that had been missing while she was not there. And perhaps she had been...since the moment they had met as foals Agave had never been able to stop thinking of her, had never felt right from that moment until he had opened his eyes and near death, saw her again.
His ears twitched in her direction even as the wind from the water continued to bring her scent to him. Lifting his head when she spoke he opened his eyes and got to his feet, turning to regard her for a few moments before stepping slower. "Something is troubling you..." He remarked, running his muzzle along her neck almost comfortingly and how strange it was to comfort someone..such an alien act before and yet so natural when he was with her.
Truthfully, when he thought about it he had known something had been troubling her for a while, she had been more restless then normal but had not offered up any excuses..as he had found no danger, seen nothing that might cause it and felt quite certain that it was not something he had caused in some manner he had let it go. Waiting patiently until she came to him... or worked it out for herself and he had a feeling that was what she was doing now.
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Posted: Fri Jul 12, 2013 2:16 pm
Aquitaine found self releasing the breath she had been holding as he ran his nose down her neck. She stepped close and let his presence calm her nerves. He knew something was bothering her, of course he did, this was Agave, not much got past him and she was honestly comforted by this fact and the fact that, while he had likely know for a while, he hadn't pressured her into telling him what it was. Had it been something else she likely would have gone to him right away, especially if it involved their safety, but it was not the case with this, she had wanted to think it through fully before approaching him about it.
And now was that time.
"It's not necessarily troubling me." She told him as she pressed her nose into his shoulder and then took a step back so that she could look at him. The changes that had happened in him were obvious now, unlike in the beginning when he had been stuck in his ways and nearly refused to change. Just think of what I could do with others if given the time and chance, she thought as her eyes rolled over her mate. "But there is something I want to talk to you about, something that has been on my mind for a while." Much as she would have liked to simply dive into her speech Aquitaine decided the best course of action would be to give it to him in chunks, not because Agave would have a hard time understanding it, not far from it, but this was such a big decision she wanted to make sure he had time to hear it out fully and give his input along the way if needed. "Oh Agave, you've grown so much since I first saw you, especially after that time near the mountain when you saved me by forcing me to run. While I never had my doubts that I could help you when you showed up on my beach that day close to death you didn't make it easy for me either. But I learned a lot from these last few months." And those things she learned could help others as well, she just needed to get away from the beach and go out to where those others were, she could no longer stand around waiting for the slim chance that they would wander by and find her, she had to go out and find them.
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Posted: Fri Jul 12, 2013 2:31 pm
Agave listened carefully as Aquitaine began to speak, for some reason this seemed to be hard or her and at the same time he sensed an excitement..or perhaps it was more like determination and for some reason that sparked just a tinge of fear in him. Oh..he was sure Aquitaine would never think or decide something that would hurt him, not consciously but it was obvious that she had come up with something big.
Agave did not necessarily like big decisions, he had already had enough change in his life to be comfortable with the idea of more and he had a feeling that whatever Aquitaine was going to tell him involved some sort of change. Why else would be be thinking back on all the things they had been through together..well unless she had come to a more practical decision and wanted a family...an idea which was equally as scary and intimidating for a stallion raised as his mothers puppet.
"Growth is something foals do." Agave told her gently "You merely helped me to see who I was truly meant to be, what I might have been had I not been raised by her.We have both learned a great deal." He had been a rather terrible patient when he thought back on it, so stubborn, so stuck in the mindset that had been ingrained in him from the moment of his birth. The wrong mindset..but when all one knows is wrong..it can seem right until a glimpse of true right came to you, as Aquitaine had come to him.
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Posted: Fri Jul 12, 2013 2:51 pm
"No." She said with a slight laugh. "Growth is not just something that foals do. We all grow throughout our lives, not just physically but mentally and spiritually as well." Aquitaine wasn't quite sure if she believed in spirits, but her experiences had taught her that there are plenty of things out there that may actually exist even if one does not believe in them. There were, she knew, plenty of Soquili that believed with all their hearts that spirits not only existed but those spirits could control things, manipulate them, who could be contacted in some way to affect others. "I have grown plenty recently as well, and some of that growth is because of you. It doesn't matter whether we call it growth or something else, it does happen to foals, to adults, to elders, to everyone, what matters is that it does happen and it's that growth that chances us, helps us become better or in some cases worse than what we were."
"And had you not been raised by her you may very well not be standing before me now." She told him, his past was not perfect but it was what had led them to be together, to become mates and grow together.
"But Agave, there are others like you were, perhaps not raised like you were or exactly like you were, but others who need someone to help them as well. I have met some Soquili in the past, ones like me who were affected by the tunnel and made differently, and many of them need someone who can help them out, tell them that it's okay to be different, to show them that they are not alone and that others will accept them." Now she was getting to the true reason she had wanted to talk to him, breaking the ice by talking about how he had changed over the past few months would help him see things for what they were. "And it's not just those Soquili, but what about the ones who look at us and think us freaks and outcasts, those that judge us by what we look like and don't want to give us the chance to show them that we aren't so different than they are." She paused for a moment to look up at him. "There are others that need help, that need to learn, to teach, to grow."
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Posted: Fri Jul 12, 2013 4:13 pm
Agave was not sure that he agreed with Aquitaine's viewpoint on growth, he believed something a touch different but it was an interesting viewpoint and he filed it away for later thought and contemplation. There was something else happening here to which he needed to place his attention. Agave was almost starting to dread the path this conversation was taking.
Something had been troubling her..but now it was starting to worry him. "No." He told her firmly as he spoke of their coming together. "It was fate that we be together..I would have found you somehow, someday." Agave could believe no other thing, could not imagine that there could have ever been a reality, a life in which he was not with Aquitaine. But it was not this thought that he found worrisome..no it was the way she was going on about other's in the world..others like them, those who were different or feared them for being different. Agave stilled slightly. "They must make their own path, as I have..as you did. That is how lessons are learned." He told her his eyes turning from her to the ocean, as though keeping his eyes firmly away from her would prevent her from stating what he was starting to think she was going to say.
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Posted: Fri Jul 12, 2013 4:32 pm
Aquitaine frowned slightly, she didn't want to argue over the finer points of how and why they ended up together. Perhaps it was fate and even had they not found each other as a foal they might have still ended up together, but would it have turned out the same? Would he have taken her to the mountain and been some sort of slave mate bringing more soldiers into his mothers army? She practically shuddered at the thought. But these thoughts didn't matter at this moment.
"You wouldn't have even gone down this path had it not been for me! Before you met me you never even knew there was anything outside of your mothers ways!" Aquitaine practically yelled at him, she hated to be harsh but it was the truth. Agave started down this road long ago, thanks to her happening upon him and putting the seed of freedom and a different life in his mind. She had opened his eyes to the world and how different it was to what he knew just as much as he had done the same to her. Perhaps it wasn't right for her to take full credit of Agave's transition from what he had been to what he was now, but Aquitaine truly doubted he would be here, be who he was right now if she hadn't been there to help him. "Even I had help at one point, help accepting who I was. Everyone needs help Agave, but not everyone is willing to help others like us. There are too many individuals out there that see an outcast and have no desire to bring such a horror into society."
Aquitaine gave her head a shake. "I just can't let that happen." She said this slowly but with force behind each word. This wasn't something she was doing on a whim, it was something she had been thinking about for a long time, especially since her first encounter with a fellow tunnel offspring who was struggling with their own identity. "I've seen others, I've talked to them, I've even helped a few, not as much as I helped you but every little bit helps." She took a deep breath before saying what she really didn't want to. "Saying they must find their own way and learn their own lessons is terrible Agave. It's things like that that the old you would have said. Don't let your mothers teachings come back to you now." It saddened her deeply the way he said it, to think that he thought and felt that way. "They need help, someone who has been through what they have and who can help them. I'm that someone Agave. I have to do this, need to do this, not for me, not for you, but for them."
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Posted: Mon Jul 15, 2013 8:13 am
This was not going at all how Agave had wanted..but he was sure it was not going how Aquitaine had wanted either and he had the grace to duck his head slightly as she chastised him for his comments. They had been harsh and perhaps cruel..and probably he didn't really mean them, Agave didn't think he could turn away someone who needed help anymore..not after receiving so much help himself along the way.
But..that didn't mean he would go out looking for people in danger either and despite Aquitaine's lofty and good intentioned goals Agave was well aware that some of those so called monsters she wanted to help were indeed monsters and not all of them could be saved. This was his fault the stallion decided, if he had not come to her..had not given her himself as an example of this change, given her this victory over evil... then maybe she wouldn't want to do this. Maybe she wouldn't want to leave the beach and march into the hell that Agave was convinced the rest of the world was enveloped in. She would be hurt..she would be putting herself in danger and she would have to make choices that agave didn't want her to make.
She was Aquitaine..she was brave and kind and driven..but she was also his Aquitaine..pure and sweet and woefully (in his mind) naive about the true horrors of the world, or at least that what he told himself as a tremor wracked his body, a shudder of fear that even he with all his previous training and his new attempts of mental control could not entirely hide. Agave knew in the deepest part of his heart that the real reason he didn't want her to do this was fear. She was capable, more then capable if he was being truthful...but he was afraid to loose her somehow, afraid to be without her and yet afraid to leave the beach and wander back into the hell world with her.
What was he going to do?
The stallion was stumped by this mental struggle and wildly trying to come up with an answer that would convince to just stay her, on the beach..where it was safe and they were secure and together and life was peaceful. Why couldn't she just be happy with this peaceful life? She had already saved him, apparently helped others..wasn't that enough? Did she really have to change try and change the world too ? Uncomfortable with being afraid and showing fear Agave let anger replace it, Anger he knew and it wrapped around him like a blanket, a harsh and uncomfortable blanket..nothing like the soothing peace he had been enjoying earlier..but a familiar one and certainly better then fear.
Eyes narrowed he stomped his hoof in the sand. "Some of them are monsters, I have seen them..and not all of them can be saved, many of them revel in the pain and suffering they cause..not because they know no different but because they enjoy it. They are cruel and vicious..most of the world is cruel and vicious..you should leave them alone" He told her firmly, his tone making it sound as though he truly believe the words her spoke, only a shadow in his eyes hinting at the poison he truly knew it was. It was wrong..but if it kept her on the beach...
But it wouldn't. Agave knew that almost as soon as he spoke them and although he tried to keep his anger, hold onto it so that he could use it to fuel more attempts it slipped from him, allowing a plea that Agave found almost shameful to escape in its stead. "Please...please don't leave, it is safe here, I am here. Please..."
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Posted: Mon Jul 15, 2013 8:40 am
She had been expecting an argument from him, a full blown, voices raised argument that would show how she was wrong and he was right, how it was still a foolish idea and most of all how he truly hadn't turned his back on his mothers teachings. It wasn't fair to think such a thing, but in that moment it was what crossed Aquitaine's mind. She stood firm waiting for an onslaught of angry words...but they didn't come flying back at her as soon as she finished talking. In fact, she was surprised when he ducked his head and remained silent for a while. It pained her to know that harsh words had been needed to prove her point but at least it had subdued Agave.
She stood there and waited for him to say something, anything. And with time she was rewarded. Aquitaine listened carefully to his words, hearing the anger laced within them and felt a pang of guilt for bringing that anger to the surface. But she was mad as well, mad at his lack of understanding and caring when she had told him her plan for helping others. When he was done she stood silent for a moment, replaying his words over and over, he was right, she knew that, in fact she had taken that exact thought into consideration well before approaching him about this idea. "I know some of them are truly monsters Agave. I know that there will be those out there that I will not be able to help no matter how much I try. I know it will be dangerous at times. I'm not looking to save everyone, because I know deep in my heart that I nor anyone else can save them all. But there are many out there that do need help, that truly want to change but have yet to be given the chance or opportunity or push needed to help them down that path." She closed her eyes for a moment before continuing. "They need help from someone who understands them, and I like to think that I do understand them. I had dealt with the stares, the unpleasant names, the attempts to rid the world of my kid. I can help them...I know I can."
His plea hit her hard. It made her want to cry, and she nearly did. But Aquitaine managed to fight back the tears, only barely, and looked at him. "I will not be leaving forever, this is my home, you are my love and my life, I would never ever turn my back on you in order to help others." She stepped into him and pressed her nose against his neck. "I may leave, I may be gone for days or maybe even weeks but I will always come back here to you. I know you don't want me to go, that you think it's best to stay here where it's safe, but I cannot live here peacefully knowing that I have a purpose out there."
Taking a step back Aquitaine looked into his multiple eyes. "I need to do this, and you need to let me. For them, for us, and for the family I one day want to have with you." She paused for another moment. "One day we will have a family Agave and I want them to be accepted in this world, not feared and hated, and if I don't do this, if I don't help others, then our children will suffer, as will their children, and their children. The world needs help Agave, I may not be able to change or help everyone but every little bit will help." Aquitaine lifted her head high, looking at him firmly. "I am going to do this, no matter what. But knowing you support me in this will make my work all the more special."
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Posted: Mon Jul 15, 2013 9:13 am
Agave was aware that Aquitaine was trying to comfort him when she stepped close, trying to reassure him that she would always come back, that she would never truly leave him..but she forgot that Agave knew how easy it was to break such promises. Oh he knew that she would never do it on purpose, he truly believed with all of his heart that she would never leave him forever if she had a choice..but Agave had seen how easily such promises could be wiped away with one foul strike of a hoof. He had wiped away some of them himself as his old and much hated guise.
No matter how much she assured him, how much she tried to comfort..Agave knew the risks and the dangers and the horrors that she wanted to step into and it would change her, such things always did. Agave could only hope that in the end..when and if she were ever satisfied with her efforts she would still be herself and would indeed come back to him. There was no stopping her, Agave could see that now, could hear the conviction in her voice..if nothing he had said so far had swayed her even a minuscule amount then nothing would. That didn't mean he had to like it, Agave was not at all convinced that Aquitaine's goal was worth the trouble it would cause her...or perhaps he was simply not as compassionate as she was. Perhaps he was to scarred and inwardly broken to feel for the needs of some unknown entity, some stranger that he would likely never meet. Agave looked away as she looked at him, turning his head to keep her from figuring out what he was thinking.
Let her...let her, in his old world he could have simply forbid her to do such a thing, demanded that she stay and been secure in the knowledge that she had no choice in the matter. But that was hardly an option now, Agave was not the stallion he had been and choice, he had learned, was a very important thing to have.No he could not stop her, not with a plea and not with an order. Being good was ,sometimes, a great deal harder and more painful then being bad. His mother had things backwards..it was not her angry, inconsequential path that required strength of will..but this gently curving path of good, peppered with hard choices and heartbreak that demanded such things. Agave was not sure he could function without Aquitaine but he would have to learn to do so if she was going to do what she was going to do.
Swinging his head back towards her he closed his eyes, ears limp at a dejected angle as he pressed his head to her chest. "Go then and know that I will be waiting. Perhaps..when..if..I can some times I might go with you." He told her, well aware that he was not always the best choice on some trips but perhaps onc in a while he could manage to make them. His spiders whom had been busily digging in the sand, hunting for insects and playing in a manner that Agave never recalled his mother's doing seemed to sense his distress as they ceased their activities and came to him, crawling upon him with soft clicks and gentle taps that seemed intended to sooth and comfort.
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Posted: Mon Jul 15, 2013 9:28 am
This was probably the hardest part, waiting for his blessing to go. She would go even if he didn't give it, but she had to wait, had to see if he would truly support her in this. Her heart pounded in her chest, partially from fear, mostly from the knowledge that she was finally going to go out there and do something, that she would no longer be standing idle waiting for others to come to her. She knew this was going to be hard on Agave, but that just showed how much he had changed and how much he did love her.
Her heart both broke and soared when he stepped forward, ears limp, head lowered and pressed it into her chest. His words she almost missed, perhaps he didn't realize that he was whispering them. "Thank you for understanding." She said laying her head down to rest against the side of his neck and rubbed her nose on his warm skin. "Of course Agave, I will bring you with me some times." And she intended to do just that, having him along would not only show the others that there are more like them that can be changed but it would also allow her to share her work with him and so that he could see how important it was for them all. "I will return as soon as I can." She took a step back and pressed her nose against his. "I love you Agave with all my heart." As she lifted her head her gaze fell upon the spiders as they tapped their legs on him. "Take care of him for me." She said softly to the spiders and then with a final nuzzle to Agave she turned and walked away.
She walked slowly ay first, listening to his breathing, the waves of the ocean, taking in the scent of the sand and salt, of the seagulls flying overhead. When she reached the edge of the beach where sand gave way to grass and trees Aquitaine stopped and turned to look back at Agave and her home. "I will be back soon, I promise." She whispered and then turned and trotted off. She had work to do, mutants to find and help and prejudiced Soquili to speak to and change their way of thinking, and of course in the back of her mind was the thought of Agave, their home and her family, something she would always, always return to.
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Posted: Mon Jul 15, 2013 10:10 am
Agave remained silent as Aquitaine spoke her good-byes, he did not feel there was a need for him to say anything more and even if he did the stallion doubted that he could have spoken them with any sort of coherence as his emotions were riding him far to hard for such things.
He returned her final nuzzle, stretching to prolong her touch for as long as he could as she stepped away and then turned to leave. Agave felt like his soul was being torn apart as he watched her walk off and when she looked back at him he almost..almost ran to her, to beg her to change her mind..anything to keep her from leaving..but the green stallion held his ground and kept his head up so that she wouldn't leave seeing him sad and forlorn. He didn't like this, not at all..but she needed this and he had no choice but to let her go and see this idea through.
But please by the gods..if there truly were gods..let her be okay out in that hard and vicious world. Agave stood there on the beach for a long time, long after Aquitaine had gone from sight, staring at the place where she had disappeared until the tide waters began to lap at his hooves and he was forced by nature itself to move. It was going to be a long night here on the beach alone.
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