❛X X◢▬▬♛｡ LAST FRIDAY NIGHT ↓⋮ yeah we danced on table top*◞s
AND WE TOOK TOO MANY SHOTS XXXX THINK WE KISSED BUT I FORGOT XXXX LAST FRIDAY NIGHT
▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀
YEAH, WE MAXED OUR CREDIT CARDS XXXX AND GOT KICKED OUT OF THE BAR XXXX SO WE HIT THE BOULEVARD
YEAH, WE MAXED OUR CREDIT CARDS XXXX AND GOT KICKED OUT OF THE BAR XXXX SO WE HIT THE BOULEVARD
YEAH, WE MAXED OUR CREDIT CARDS XXXX AND GOT KICKED OUT OF THE BAR XXXX SO WE HIT THE BOULEVARD
❛ —THIS ▋:FRIDAY⇣ NIGHT!⌋
◣*DO IT 》ALL AGAIN )₀₁
borrowed this from you, taters.▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀CALENDAR / WEATHERJanuary l February l March l April l May l June l July l August l September l October l November l December
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 l 21 l 22 l 23 l 24 l 25 l 26 l 27 l 28 l 29 l 30 l 31
Monday | Tuesday | Wednesday | Thursday | Friday | Saturday | Sunday
Sunny | Windy | Cloudy | Rain | Storm | Snow | Humid | Cold
AUGUST 22-29: WELCOME BITCHESSSS. So, as you all know yesterday (Friday, duh) was move-in day. You whiny little freshman pricks got to experience the dorm life. Hope you didn't mind your roommate's weird noises too much. ANYWAY.
ITS RUSH WEEK. For those of you that don't know, Rush week is where you pick the Frat you wanna pledge to and
make that s**t work. Keep in mind, pledgies, that rush week is designed to tour the Frat's. So, even though you've pledged
Alpha doesn't mean you get to stay an Alpha. You've pledged to them, now it's their turn to decide whether they want to pledge to
you.
AUGUST 22: Kicking off Rush Week is the annual Alpha party. These guys are going to show you just why it is the ladies (and men) cream themselves when they hear Alpha. This party is guaranteed to be off the chain, and you just might lose your virginity tonight so make sure your underwear is clean, pledgies.
AUGUST 23: It's the Beta's turn to wow you. Their party is right after the Alpha's and while it won't be
as fun, you'll still have a killer ******** time. Chances of you getting laid are even slimmer now, but hey, there's always the good ol' skin mag and that bottle of lube you keep hidden under your bed.
AUGUST 24: The Delta's party, WHAZZAP. I... honestly wouldn't sit
anywhere, touch
anything or make
any sudden movements. But hey, if you feel like getting wild you can always crank up that music and pray these guys don't have 'nam flashbacks and go all mental on your a**. Delta parties
always end in at least a few casualties. And by this I mean the campus police showing up and at least four ambulances. Someone always goes overboard.
AUGUST 25: DON'T EAT THE BROWNIES. Last, but certainly not least, the Omega's simmer things down with their chill a** vibes and contemplation of the universe and whether that dinosaur in the kitchen is legit or not. These guys... their parties tend to be epic but in a weird sort of, "dude lets just chill and watch netflix" way. You will
not be getting laid, but you will experience the safest most epic high of your life. And if you end up gaining the freshman 15 in one night, well... at least you'll be doing so happily, ja feel?
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