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"Azkaban-- the wizard's prison. Honestly Goyle, if you were any slower, you'd be going backwards."


"Arthur, is that you?"
"Yes," came Mr. Weasley's weary voice. "But I would say that even if I were a Death Eater, dear. Ask the question!"
"Oh, honestly..."
"Molly!"
"All right, all right... What is your dearest ambition?"
"To find out how airplanes stay up."
Mrs. Weasley nodded and turned the doorknob, but apparently Mr. Weasley was holding tight to it on the other side, because the door remained firmly shut.
"Molly! I've got to ask you your question first!"
"Arthur, really, this is just silly..."
"What do you like me to call you when we're alone together?"
Even by the dim light of the lantern Harry could tell that Mrs. Weasley had turned bright red; he himself felt suddenly warm around the ears and neck, and hastily gulped soup, clattering his spoon as loudly as he could against the bowl.
"Mollywobbles," whispered a mortified Mrs. Weasley into the crack at the edge of the door.

Fred and George, however, found all this very funny. They went out of their way to march ahead of Harry down the corridors, shouting, "Make way for the Heir of Slytherin, seriously evil wizard coming through..."

Ron was staring at Pettigrew with the utmost revulsion.
"I let you sleep in my bed!" he said.

"OH NO YOU DON'T, LADDIE!"
Harry spun around. Professor Moody was limping down the marble staircase. His wand was out and it was pointing right at a pure white ferret.
"I want to fix that in my memory forever," said Ron, his closed and an uplifted expression on his face. "Draco Malfoy, the amazing bouncing ferret..."

"It unscrews the other way"

McGonagall rules! Not only is she helping Peeves, makes you wonder about her- how does she know which way the chandelier unscrews?

"I am not aware that it is any of your business what goes on in my house --"
"I expect what you're not aware of would fill several books, Dursley," growled Moody.
-- OotP, pg 869

I love Moody! xd heart


And if you want interesting quotes that aren't necessarily from the books, you should read these fanfictions ... ( they're scene-for-scene satire of the first two movies. whee )

Harry Potter and the Cubic Zirconium of Doom
Harry Potter and the Plumbing of Doom

My one of my favorites from Plumbing of Doom:

Quote:

[[ He opens the book. ]]

HARRY: Oh, hell, there’s nothing in it. Well, might as well put it to good use.

[[ Harry starts writing. ]]

HARRY: Dear diary, today Ron tried to grope me under the table at supper. Am beginning to worry about author’s age-perception abilities. Also, Seamus accused me of being a pervy Slytherin fancier. What’s that supposed to mean?

Suddenly…

TOM RIDDLE: Stop that! This diary’s not blank; I wrote it in moon-letters, you a**.

HARRY: Oh, hello. I’m Harry Potter.

TOM: Hello, Harry Potter. I’m Tom Riddle.

HARRY: Random complete stranger, can you tell me anything about the Chamber of Secrets?

TOM: No. But I can show you.

HARRY: Why not? I trust you completely, unfamiliar man who lives in a mysterious book.

I can't be bothered to dig up the books and look for the exact words. >>; I'll just say that I love the random funny things Fred and George say. They really crack me up. xd I love those two. <33

I love the spiders quote. Prolly the best quote in the movies. Oh and "Yes, Hermione, I think this is going to be exactly like wizard's chess."
Now in the books I'm a total fan of really anything Ginny says shes hilarious and all the times when Fred and George finish each other's sentences like when they're giving Harry the map. But prolly my fave is, "ooooh Potty and Loony. Potty luuuuuurves Loony." Peeves is awesome.

Oh yeah, and in the Chamber of Secrets when Ron and Harry are following the spiders into the Forbidden Forest:
Ron; "Follow the spiders, follow the spiders. Why can't it be follow the butterflies?

Ooh yes I LOVE those ones!!

Spiders! Spiders. They want me to tap dance! I don't wanna tap dance!!