|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Sat Sep 02, 2006 7:59 am
Random idea... What do you think about the basic plot?
There's a girl who's the daughter of a high-ranking police officer in some made-up city in the year 2016. She's a bit of a tech geek, and loves to write, but that's beside the point. The officer gets into a situation with a robbery, and accidentally shoots a little boy. The scandal becomes covered up by the police pretty well, but it really bothers the girl.
One day, they get the news that her father was shot. The girl doesn't know what to think, and vows revenge for her now-wreaked life. She uses her skill to track down the suspected killer, and corners him. Blah blah blah, it turns out to be the little boy's brother.
Long story short, through a weird turn of events, they fall in love, but it's harder than it sounds. Word gets out that he's the killer, and he's being tracked by the police, etc. etc., he was on the verge of insanity from watching his little brother die, and then from killing someone...
I'm going to describe the future world a bit, making it a little different from today, but hopefully interesting, and throw some other things in, but what do you think? Is it a good idea, or totally trash? sweatdrop Thanks smile
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Sep 02, 2006 9:08 am
YAY MILD SCI-FI!
The killer being a brother is a bit predictable, but after that I like it. Maybe make him still a little insane? The character who is messed up almost to the pont where they cannot function is an excelent challenge for a writer. ( I love doing it but it's SO HARD!) Anyway, it's a good idea. I cant wait to see how you'll handle the little boys death and how you'll describe your future world. No cliche's right?
Post it soon!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Sep 02, 2006 9:37 am
Yeah, I know. But It kinda has to be his brother; they're orphans, and they were stealing to basically live. And then his little brother gets shot before his eyes, so it's very hard for him.
But thank-you ^^ I'm looking forward to writing it!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Sep 02, 2006 10:51 am
...I know if you ever write that, then I'll imagine the two brothers looking like Ed and Al, and the main character like Winry.
But that's beside the point.
Seems like a pretty good idea to me. Make the future interesting, and give the characters some depth, and I think you'll be well on your way top a good story.
My one complaint is the fact the girl loves to write. Its pretty overdone from my point of view. I wouldn't suggest using that type of hobby unless something the character's writing is a part of the plot. So my suggestion would be to toss out the hobby or integrate that fact into the plot somehow.
And... that's all I'll say for now.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Sep 02, 2006 3:52 pm
While I was reading the plot, right when I was at the part where it says "... it turns out to be the little boy's", I thought you were going to say Mother. I seriously did, and that would have been hilarious, like mind reading power... or mind thinking power. XD
I like it, it sounds cool. I really have nothing else to say to it, other then I like it, (XD) because my brain is not functioning right, but yea.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Sep 03, 2006 11:00 am
OK, thanks, everyone smile
And I'm going to have to think about what I want to do with the hobby.. Like I said, I haven't gotten too far with this yet xd
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Sep 05, 2006 8:20 am
Well, the girl's writing skills could be used for confusing the police.
Overall, the idea is awsome, but is there any particular reason for it being in the future, or do you just want to start with a simi-blank world?
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Sep 05, 2006 3:15 pm
Oooo... I just learned of an interesting concept in Human Geography. It might be something you could incorporate into your story. Apparently some people think that the cities along the eastern seaboard will eventually combine to make a megacity. It could be the kind of thing you could use as a setting or something.
Just a suggestion, of course. 3nodding
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Sep 06, 2006 12:50 pm
I guess I just wanted something a little different than the average, and also have some room to create smile
And I like that idea, Stripe 3nodding And that would be cool if it did happen. Mega Boston/New York thing xd
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Sep 08, 2006 12:14 pm
Yes, there is and up side to that, but there is down side too. More than likely, most of the natural wild life would be torn down or cultivated. And as the number of backpackers are incresing by nearly four percent every year, that would confine them into a smaller place for them to tear up. Heh, heh. Yea, real bad....
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jul 02, 2007 1:43 pm
Oh! Oh! I just had an idea for her hobby of writing. Instead of the police finding out her dad got shot, he could get shot when the two of them are out getting ice cream or something. She would go off on her own, like, to the bathroom, and hear the shot and come running out. She'd see her dad dead, a shadowy figure running, and a piece of paper on the ground. The paper would be, like, code or something that he did it for his brother, and she'd find out who he was using that. Then when she knows who he is, she can use the same code to get him to trust her or want to meet her. The cops get ahold of the original note and try to decypher it, so the girl has to make different notes that point to a completely different person to save the real guy because she fell in love with him.
Just an idea. Oh, and I love the idea. Very original. whee
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
