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Ugh... My head...

Green eyes fluttered and winced at the seemingly bright lights above them. They squeezed shut.

I feel like I've been hit with a brick..

A low groan was emitted from the figure on the floor and one hand reached up to rub the eyes.

"What the hell," came a mutter. Finally, everything came into focus. And Adelaide's head turned. That's right, the cafeteria.. "What the heck? Did I faint?" No way in hell!

But then again.. looking around, Adelaide noticed there were a lot of kids on the ground, and a few face first into their mashed potatoes. Ew.

But wait! Adelaide startled, then gawked. They.. the, the guys! They were wearing the girls' uniforms! And god love them, but some of them needed to shave. And-and the girls! They were... hey.

Adelaide blinked. "Bruin?" Is that... "Is that.. " That guy.. that had been sitting near where Adelaide had been before she got up to get another roll... He looked just like..

"Bruin? Holy-!-wait.." Adelaide looked down suddenly.

"Holy crap! What-what.. I-! Where did they GO?"

He patted himself down to be sure--yup. They were gone, alright. And with no forwarding address, thank-you-very-much!

"What.. the hell did I eat?"

Out in a girl's bathroom near the dorms, a shrill, frantic scream shot down the halls in either direction.

The doors shot open, and out burst a still very effeminate and upset young boy with long strawberry blonde hair, wearing a rather unfitting schoolgirl uniform and skewed diamond-shaped glasses. The boy shot down the hallway.

"AAAAAAAAAAUUUGH!!" Charlie screamed again, wide eyed with fear and disgust at what "he'd" just seen.

After Bruin and the others had stopped staring, gawking, and groping themselves to be sure, they, including Adelaide, walked around helping people get up. Man, what a bummer to have to break it to someone that their favorite asset(s) is/are now MIA. One or two had seemed near to tears. A few others (girls, mostly) had just been relieved that their hair was still intact.

Shaking his head, Adelaide waved to Bruin. "I'm gonna go outside. See if I can trade clothes with someone, you know?"

"Okay, good idea! I'll probably do that too. Bye!"

Heading out, he let his eyes wander over the grounds of stricken, surprised, and (some, apparently) celebratory gasps. Adelaide raised an eyebrow as Dorian's group ran by. "At least someone's having fun," he commented to himself.

Man, though, he really needs a boy's uniform! "This skirt seriously doesn't cut it," he muttered. Aside from the skirt trying to slip down too far, and the shirt being baggy, he just looked bad! Oh well. At least he remembered to shave his legs this morning. (Some of the girls hadn't and, well, boys usually do have more hair on their legs than girls. It wasn't pretty.)

He walked up to the main offices, hoping to get temporary permission to wear a boy's uniform. Because this looked ridiculous and who knew how long it would last!

Dorian quickly slammed the door behind him and locked it. Roxanne screamed from inside the bathroom. "Roxanne?" Dorian called, "Go away!" was the answer. "Open the door! It happened to me too!" The bathroom door slowly creaked open, Roxanne with his eyes red and tearful, stood in the doorway cautiously observing Dorian as he started to change clothes.

"I can't get my arms out of this retarded blouse. Help me out." Roxanne warily walked over to Dorian and held the shoulder sleeve of his uniform as he struggled out of it. Dorian reached under his shirt and unclasped the bra, taking it off and tossing it to the floor. Honestly, there was no point in wearing that thing at this point. The tank he was wearing underneath looked like a poorly fit wifebeater, so he tore out of it too and began searching through the closet for a t-shirt. Dorian caught a glimpse of himself shirtless in the mirror...this... was so ******** up. "Mm... D-Dorian..?"

"What?" He asked, irritably, pulling out a dark gray t-shirt and pulling it over. It stretched across his chest and shoulders. It was still too tight, but at least it wasn't riding up his midriff. "Uhnn... n-nothing..."

"Can you turn around? I'm changing out of this." Dorian tossed a pair of black pants onto the bed, and then rummaged through the dresser for a pair of boxers he knew he owned... somewhere! Underwear and socks came flying out of the drawer as Dorian violently tore through it. With his new...well... parts... none of this stuff would fit comfortably anymore. He found them, rumpled up at the bottom of the drawer... they had probably previously belonged to Hoffman. "Seriously Roxanne, turn around!" Was an order as he gestured violently, boxers in hand flailing around. Roxanne turned and covered his eyes with the palms of his hand. Dorian cautiously began changing out of the skirt, mortified at the discoveries. He even closed his eyes really tight a couple of times and then re-opened them in hopes it would disappear... but nope! Once his pants were on (also uncomfortably snug) he looked himself over in the mirror. "I look like a flaming f**!!!" Dorian screamed, pulling at his hair. The attempt to cope with the change failed miserably.

"At least your name is a boy's name." Seemed to be Roxanne's main concern. "It is not!" Dorian spat defensively, "Yes it is." His roommate insisted. "More commonly a boy's name than it is a girl's!" A fist came in Roxanne's direction, but he caught it, and the two started grappling each other. But as knees flew, both of them were painfully aware of their new no-zones.

For the next few minutes, both Roxanne and Dorian lay in fetal position, cursing at each other.

The drug addict was dazed, staring up at Charlie with a distant expression. Reinier reached down and pulled Charlie up off Dedrick. Though female, Reinier didn't lose an ounce her strength.

"If ...you were still a lesbian... we could be having like... lesbian sex right now." Dedrick murmured while blinking at Charlie cluelessly.

"Oooh!" Manni flicked her wrist in Charlotte's direction. "The freaky switch happened to you, too. Am I the only one who's ecstatic!? I'm so glad I wore my bra today!" Manni drifted off to her own world, fondling her breasts again.

"What won't come off...?" Dedrick asked slowly, her red sunken eyes looking over Charlie as she pulled out her switchblade from her jacket pocket. "You could just... cut it?" She suggested, still unsure what Charlie was talking about.

"Oh my gosh, you and Dorian should have a**l!" Manni chimmed in abruptly, then started laughing loudly to herself.

Dumbly, Dedrick slowly passed the knife to Charlie who snatched it out of her hands. As the crazy teenager fiddled with it, the trio of girls watched intently to see if Charlie was going to do it. "Are you going to kill yourself?" Manni asked, mildly amused.

Charlie looked up at him slowly, his wide-eyed expression set and grim. "Of course not! What do you take me for!? I'm gonna CUT IT OFF." He took a shaky breath and flicked the knife open.

Their knees pulled in, eyes squinted. Reinier quickly grabbed Charlie's hand and shook her head, wincing. Dedrick quickly took the switchblade back, "Not in front of us you won't! I don't want your wiener on my blade!" She bit her lower lip, the thought of it was just too much to handle! Manni shook her head and pat Charlie on the shoulder "I know Charlotte it's the world's greatest tragedy. Think of how I felt all these years!" She sighed dramatically, pressing her hand to her forehead. "But there's a sea of butch women out there now, who are just dying for some of that." He pointed between Charlie's legs.

Manni left Charlie's side and motioned for the others to follow her. "As for me? I have lots of pretty, slender men to select from! Come on girls, why are we wasting time?! This really is a dream come true. Toodles, Charlotte!"

"Hey, Roxanne..." Dorian rolled over onto his back, finally recovering from the injury. He glanced casually at his roommate, then quirked his eyebrow. "Do you wanna fool around?" Roxanne struggled, but got up off the floor and limped over to his side of the room. "No!"

"So then you are gay!" Dorian sat up on his elbows, grinning smugly. "No, Dorian, just because I'm not going to have sex with you, no matter what gender, doesn't mean I'm gay!" Roxanne threw his pillow at his roommate. It hit Dorian, but he wasn't fazed. "We don't have to do anything crazy! You can just do what you'd usually do to a guy as a girl."

Roxanne was disgusted at this proposition.

"I'll do it back to you, if you wanna know what it feels like."

Now Roxanne was ready to vomit. "Dorian, get out of the dormitory." Dorian started laughing "Why?" "Get out!" "Make me." "I'll punch you in the nuts." "I'll punch you in the nuts!"

Moments later Dorian lay in the hallway, slumped over in agony and Roxanne was in his bed, clutching the family jewels.

But Dorian was determined to enjoy himself in this new predicament. He wasn't going to let it own him, he was going to own it! He remembered late night phone conversations with Manni, and this sort of subject often coming up so... might as well use it!

And so the quest begins!

Dorian headed over to the "boys" dormitory, which was now (no doubt), the girls. He decided he'd probably do a better job picking up girls than the guys ever could.