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| Agree or Disagree? |
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[ 6 ] |
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11% |
[ 3 ] |
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| Total Votes : 27 |
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 Posted: Sun Oct 29, 2006 2:58 pm
In my opinion the healthiest type of family consists of a father, mother, and their children. One main reason for this is because there are things that men can do that women cannot and things that women can do that men cannot. Therefore, there are things that men can teach and/or give to their children that women cannot and things that women can teach and/or give to their children that men cannot. A woman can raise a boy without a husband, but she cannnot completely teach a boy how to be a man, one reason being is that she is not a man and men and women think differently. Also, a man can raise a girl, but he does not know everything about how to teach her how to be a woman, one reason being is that he is not a woman himself and men and women think differently. For both of the children mentioned, there would be something missing in their lives, even if they themselves didnt know what exactly it is that is missing. Even for me, not having a father at home has left a piece of me damaged. God did indeed intend for families to have both a mother and father and God did indeed make men and women differently, and not only as far as physical aspects go. Yes men and women are equal in that man is not better than woman and woman is not better than man, but we are different and have different purposes in families.
Point: God made man and woman different physically and concerning the way we think. Therefore there are things that a man can teach his child that a woman cannot and things that a woman can teach her child that a man cannot. Therefore, this is one reason why i believe that in a family, God intends for there to be a husband, wife, and their children. So...
Discuzzle:
Agree?
Disagree?
Why do you agree/disagree?
Anything relevent to the topic
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Posted: Sun Oct 29, 2006 3:53 pm
I agree with you completely. Alot of people might argue that all you need is two loving people who are committed to raising children, but I honestly think to be stable and healthy, fully, you need more than that.
And I know someone's going to say that if that's true then divorce and single parenting shouldn't be allowed. And to answer that, I will say that I believe divorce and single parenting shouldn't be allowed. Yes, there are great parents out there who have raised children on their own, but you have situations that are good, better, and best. My brother has lacked any kind of good father figure in his life, the only two being drug addicts and abusive. While I agree that no father is better than a father like that, I do believe that having a good father figure is better than having on father figure. Eep ... that's really confusing. But when you think about it, if these parents who are bad parents had had good parents themselves, then there would be no single parenting. It all goes back to the beginning. Somewhere along the line, someone was treated badly, and that just got passed down, causing families to break up because someone or more than one someone was treating others badly.
But ideally, children should be raised by both a mother and father. My mother taught me how to be a woman (albeit, in a sort of unorthidox and backwards sort of way), and my father taught me about the kind of man I want in my life. Had either of those two been missing, where would I be??
This isn't to say that I think it should be original parents, just so long as there is that kind of permanent figure in their life.
Okay ... I have no idea what I'm trying to say now. sweatdrop
BTW, do you mind if I move this into the discussion subforum??
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High-functioning Businesswoman
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Posted: Sun Oct 29, 2006 3:56 pm
Fushigi na Butterfly And to answer that, I will say that I believe divorce and single parenting shouldn't be allowed.
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Posted: Sun Oct 29, 2006 4:06 pm
Okay, okay, I need to clarify. Divorce for reasons such as "oh, we don't get along" or "oh we don't love each other anymore" shouldn't be allowed. Yes, infidelity and abuse should be the only grounds for getting divorced. People who don't get along have so many other options besides divorce. Just because you have a period of disagreement with your friend doesn't mean you stop being their friend; you work on the problem and try to keep the relationship together. Couples who say they don't love each other don't necessarily not love each other anymore, they just don't have the spark they initially felt when they first started falling in love. Usually. I'm sure there are some exceptions, but for the most part, it's the reason I stated before.
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High-functioning Businesswoman
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Posted: Sun Oct 29, 2006 6:01 pm
ORLY? This topic just hit me really hard. I found out an hour ago that my parents are separating and I have to choose someone to live with. This means that your perfect family just got screwed. My parents fight all the time, and my dad is a real... I shouldn't go there. I'm really not sure it's a good idea for them to remain married to each other. I think a loving family composed of a father, mother, and kids is great. However, I have not been afforded that situation. What happens now. Should God penalize me for this? I'm ever so happy for you that you think it's fine to tell people whether or not they have a healthy family life, but those of us not so fortunate as yourself to choose what kind of world we're born into tend not to appreciate those kinds of comments. Fushigi na Butterfly And to answer that, I will say that I believe divorce and single parenting shouldn't be allowed. I can't believe people sometimes. You've just said that this shouldn't be allowed, then go on to blame the son for the sins of his father. That makes zero sense. I'll probably have to come back tomorrow and make my post a little... nicer, but right now, I'm a bit upset with the way things are going and the things that have been said in this topic.
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Posted: Sun Oct 29, 2006 6:18 pm
Okay, I think some clarifications need to be made on my part.
Ideally a nuclear family should consist of a man and woman, and children if they have them, for the sake of the children namely, but it also provides a good social network for everyone to lean back on in hard times, and even in good times.
But, sometimes things outside of our control happen, and it might be best for married couples to get divorced. I think this should be done, however, after everything else has been tried on both parts (the part of the wife and the part of the husband) to try to keep things together. Marriage counseling is definitely an option, and maybe even being separated for a little while (not to be confused with divorced) could help for each person to sort out their differences and come back with a clear head. It should not, however, be a time for each person to plot against the other and figure out how much they're going to get after a divorce is finalized.
The only time Jesus says that divorce is allowed is in cases of adultery, but I think it's reasonable to broaden that to cases of abuse, because that is not good or healthy for anyone.
I don't know your exact situation, but if your dad really is the not nice person you make him out to be, perhaps it would really be best for your parents to split up. And if you'd read my last post, you would have noticed that I amended my opinion about divorce and single parenting.
I'm very sorry that you're having to go through what you're going through. It's never any fun, and it pretty much generally sucks for everyone involved. My parents divorced when I was two, so I don't ever remember them being together, and when I was thirteen, my mom was having problems that forced me to make a decision to live with my dad (which was probably the hardest thing I've ever had to go through). I would highly suggest praying on the situation, and praying for both of your parents, because divorce isn't easy on the husband and wife either.
And I'm sorry that I offended you earlier.
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High-functioning Businesswoman
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Posted: Sun Oct 29, 2006 6:33 pm
I realize no offense was meant, and I apologize as well. My dad, being the way he is, would rather leave us than go to some counseling, so I see divorce as a likely event... which I think I'd almost like to see. Not a biblically permitted divorce, but still... I resent my father to the highest degree. He doesn't care about us, and could write down every word we've said to each other this year on a Post-it note.
Back to the topic: yes, I think God's plan consisted of a man and a woman, and possibly children. That situation is exhibited many times in Scripture. Unfortunately, it doesn't always work out that way...
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Posted: Sun Oct 29, 2006 6:47 pm
Yes, it is unfortunate that it doesn't work out all the time. It seems alot of things don't always work out the way God had planned it from the beginning, but ultimately things do work out the way they are supposed to. Perhaps this is all planned out for you. It could be a test of your faith, and test of whether or not you will be able to forgive your father for whatever he may have done (even if he doesn't seem very deserving of your forgiveness), and maybe even a test of who you turn to for guidance. I will be praying for you as you go through this hard time. Will you keep us posted as things develop? You don't have to, and I certainly understand if you don't want to, but it will make praying for you more effective I think. heart
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High-functioning Businesswoman
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Posted: Sun Oct 29, 2006 7:35 pm
Yes a sensitive topic. But with my two cents here I will say what God intended for the family and how a family works itself out in a fallen world are two different things. I agree God designed a family to consist of a man and a woman with each having a unique input for their children, but we live in a fallen world and sin gets in to distort things. Really distorts things. Now that Jesus has conquered all sin on the cross, He makes a way available in the worst of situations for those who believe in Him. The wonderful part of being a part of the Body of Christ is that when tragedy happens or has happened in a family, God can use the members to help fill in the gaps. A good church will be like a second family and contribute to helping you to grow up into the full stature of Christ. So not only do you end up with many brothers and sisters, but also many father and mother figures that encourage and build you up in the faith.
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Posted: Mon Oct 30, 2006 2:04 pm
Fast Lane Angel ORLY? This topic just hit me really hard. I found out an hour ago that my parents are separating and I have to choose someone to live with. This means that your perfect family just got screwed. My parents fight all the time, and my dad is a real... I shouldn't go there. I'm really not sure it's a good idea for them to remain married to each other. I think a loving family composed of a father, mother, and kids is great. However, I have not been afforded that situation. What happens now. Should God penalize me for this? I'm ever so happy for you that you think it's fine to tell people whether or not they have a healthy family life, but those of us not so fortunate as yourself to choose what kind of world we're born into tend not to appreciate those kinds of comments. Fushigi na Butterfly And to answer that, I will say that I believe divorce and single parenting shouldn't be allowed. I can't believe people sometimes. You've just said that this shouldn't be allowed, then go on to blame the son for the sins of his father. That makes zero sense. I'll probably have to come back tomorrow and make my post a little... nicer, but right now, I'm a bit upset with the way things are going and the things that have been said in this topic.
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Posted: Mon Oct 30, 2006 2:15 pm
i agree but i would go even as far as saying that a man cant raise a boy alone either... because a boy needs to see how to treat a woman... respectfully... and it all depends on why the mom isnt there... because my mom died but not until i was already raised like i should be...
and the same goes for a woman teaching a girl.... because girls need to learn how to react to men. and they need to learn how to read us properly... and that only comes with a family relationship
the family is the strongest bond that should never ba able to be broken by anything even if you have arguments and disagreements you must fight to stick it out...
that is while the bible says not to be unevenly yolked meaning a couple should idealy share the same beliefes so that when problems do arise they know that they should pray that God will help them...
wow i am really sounding like a marrage councelor... i wounder how much they get paid... oh wait you have to take like 6 years of collage to do that.
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Posted: Mon Oct 30, 2006 2:17 pm
knivesl i agree but i would go even as far as saying that a man cant raise a boy alone either... because a boy needs to see how to treat a woman... respectfully... and it all depends on why the mom isnt there... because my mom died but not until i was already raised like i should be... and the same goes for a woman teaching a girl.... because girls need to learn how to react to men. and they need to learn how to read us properly... and that only comes with a family relationship the family is the strongest bond that should never ba able to be broken by anything even if you have arguments and disagreements you must fight to stick it out... that is while the bible says not to be unevenly yolked meaning a couple should idealy share the same beliefes so that when problems do arise they know that they should pray that God will help them... wow i am really sounding like a marrage councelor... i wounder how much they get paid... oh wait you have to take like 6 years of collage to do that.
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Posted: Mon Oct 30, 2006 3:58 pm
A family is a mommie, a daddie, children and maybe some pet(s)
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Posted: Mon Oct 30, 2006 4:13 pm
Fushigi na Butterfly Okay, okay, I need to clarify. Divorce for reasons such as "oh, we don't get along" or "oh we don't love each other anymore" shouldn't be allowed. Yes, infidelity and abuse should be the only grounds for getting divorced. People who don't get along have so many other options besides divorce. Just because you have a period of disagreement with your friend doesn't mean you stop being their friend; you work on the problem and try to keep the relationship together. Couples who say they don't love each other don't necessarily not love each other anymore, they just don't have the spark they initially felt when they first started falling in love. Usually. I'm sure there are some exceptions, but for the most part, it's the reason I stated before. Again, Jesus disagrees. Divorce is always an option. It's remarriage that's the sin.
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