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 Posted: Fri Jun 10, 2005 4:34 pm
Hi.
This here is my portfolio.
I will be posting a handful of my works on here for those who wish to read them and tell me what they think of them.
Constructive critisim is encouraged.
Hope you enjoy my writing.
mrgreen
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Posted: Fri Jun 10, 2005 4:38 pm
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Posted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 4:00 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 25, 2005 1:36 pm
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Posted: Mon Aug 01, 2005 1:35 pm
I really liked your two poems. I didn't get to read the whole story, but it looks good. In your first poem, you show an emotion like sadness and sympathy. Its very good. Although it seems like sometiimes there's a rhyme scheme, and sometimes there isnt. And I really really like the second poem. Its very strong, and...motivational. heh...that seems like a strange word to describe it with, but thats the way it feels. Your pushing someone to show their inner self. I likey ^-^
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Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 7:42 am
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Posted: Wed Sep 07, 2005 3:32 pm
Oh the Sheer dissapointment.
No one will comment my works.
gonk
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Posted: Mon Sep 19, 2005 11:41 pm
Dark_wild, I liked your poems, they remind me alot of myself, really. They were really great, but in the first poem you've misspelled because...and that's all i really noticed.
As for the story, I must admit it was a little hard to read...ok i had a hard time reading it because it was in red. The poems worked in red but the story, its a lot of reading and red does not prove easy on the eyes. Sorry about that but the red...it burns us...it burns us!
~keep writing, you're good at it.
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Posted: Mon Sep 19, 2005 11:44 pm
dark_wild Oh the Sheer dissapointment. No one will comment my works. gonk I feel your pain, I can't get a comment on my stories to save my life...and if I get one I'm doing good... cry *hugs Dark_wild comforting her* Don't worry, just believe that they will come.
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Posted: Tue Sep 20, 2005 12:05 am
Oterys Dark_wild, I liked your poems, they remind me alot of myself, really. They were really great, but in the first poem you've misspelled because...and that's all i really noticed. As for the story, I must admit it was a little hard to read...ok i had a hard time reading it because it was in red. The poems worked in red but the story, its a lot of reading and red does not prove easy on the eyes. Sorry about that but the red...it burns us...it burns us!~keep writing, you're good at it.
Later during the argument with her mother, you might want to add a coma: You can?t keep me locked up like this all the time," Valerie shouted, pain in her voice.
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Posted: Tue Sep 20, 2005 12:20 am
Oterys Dark_wild, I liked your poems, they remind me alot of myself, really. They were really great, but in the first poem you've misspelled because...and that's all i really noticed. As for the story, I must admit it was a little hard to read...ok i had a hard time reading it because it was in red. The poems worked in red but the story, its a lot of reading and red does not prove easy on the eyes. Sorry about that but the red...it burns us...it burns us!~keep writing, you're good at it. One thing I noticed when reading your poems and this is just my opinion...but where it says she's she and she's different...I thought it might flow better and make for less assumption that it was a type-o if you said she is she, and she is different.
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Posted: Fri Sep 23, 2005 12:25 pm
Thank goodness.
SOMEONE HAS SOMETHING TO SAY TO ME.
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