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 Posted: Thu Dec 21, 2006 7:34 am
Ok. So here's a bit about me, in the form of my beliefs. I've been pagan all my life, so I've had a lot of time to figure out what I believe, and to do research, and make my choices.
Feel free to make a similar post, or to ask me questions, ect.
I see a lot of people who take pieces of Wicca and put them into their ecclectic faith. I don't personally follow the Threefold rule of the Wiccan path. That was, in fact, one of the many things that turned me off about Wicca. Though I won't go into those. I mean, there is Karma. But I don't think it hits quite that hard, personally. In fact, I don't think I have any part of Wicca in my faith, period.
Being of both Discordian and Thelemic underviews, I find revenge acceptable. I just don't use magic to do it. Its much easier, and more effective, for me to do it on my own.
And I generally never need, or really want to get revenge, anyways. I'm a forgiving person, depending on the situation. Most of the time, I simply stop talking to the offender.
I follow the Goddess Eris, and the God Eros. Though, previously my patron, and only God, was Dionysus. I primarily follow the Greek pantheon of Gods.
Dionysus is my Father God, I should say. Hence my surname. He was with me through my whole childhood, in my dreams, under his Roman name, Bacchus. I prefer the Greek name, however.
A friend of mine suggest Eris might be my Mother God... And that perhaps Eros is, so to speak, the husband figure in my life. This was based on how and when they came into my life.
Eris was usually there, but she generally took the backburner, simply observing my life. It wasn't until I called to her, asking her to please keep me from actually being pregnant (I wasn't, and for that I thank her eternally), because there was an accident, and I needed her protection.
The fact that she stopped merely observing at that point suggests that, being there for me in a time of great need, she see's me, perhaps, as her own child. She's around a lot more, now. And I think she's taking care of me.
Eros showed up around two months before my 18th birthday (so just recently), as my strong connection with my Father, Dionysus, was begining to wane. That is, he was letting me go, because I was going to be an adult now. Eros showed up, and I think Dionysus decided that Eros had much to teach me in adult hood. Things Dionysus couldn't show me, or didn't feel he had the right to show me. My friend suggested that this was "stepping back to let his daughter marry".
In fact, I held a dedication ceremony just this past June, a month or so before my 18th birthday occured. It was the 2nd, and I will never forget it.
But, because I wanted to honor my Fahter, I took his name as my surname that night. And ever since, I've refered to myself as Candice Niko Dionysus. My middle name originally being Nicole.
Now, I do work with other Gods in the Greek pantheon. When I need their help, like good friends, they will oblige. But I have also been known to occasionally dabble with the Norse Gods and Goddesses. Not always, but once in a while.
This is because a lot of my beliefs on how the world was created, how it will end, and my mannerisms, and most of how I live my life, is all based on Asatru beliefs and moral structures. Things like Ragnarok, and the Nine Noble Virtues, and honoring your ancestors... And I plan on putting my final request, in my will, as having a Viking Funeral.
A Viking Funeral, incase you aren't familiar with the term, is when you are placed in a small boat, with your most personal of belongings, back then that would include your sword/axe/bow/ect., and then set afire, and sent to drift, burning, at sea. The ultimate of cremations. You body burns, and you are returned to the most primordial of Elements, the Water. This was mainly because the Vikings were a Water-faring people.
The reason I wish for a funeral of this type is spilt into three reasons. The first reason is that the literal translation of the word Hell is "in the ground". Therefore, I don't wish to be burried, as it would mean being put in 'hell'.
The second reason is that I love the water, more than anything on the planet. I love to swim in it, I love to drink it, and I love to watch its waves, gentle or harsh, crash upon the sand or rock.
The third is a more scientific reason. It is because we are made up mostly of water. And so it would be the ultimate return to where we had come from.
And, hopefully I will have lived a nobel and virtuous life... Perhaps a hero's life... And I will go to Valhalla.
I bet you're wondering just how I could have been "Pagan all my life". Its got a lot to do with my dreams as a child. I can never hope to fully explain them, so I will merely go with the basics.
When I was very, very young... Perhaps before I was old enough to talk, I had dreams of the Greek God Dionysus. Of course, when I was old enough to ask his name, he gave me the name Bacchus. But these days, I tend to stick to the Greek names of that specific set of Gods.
In these dreams, we would be in one of the most gorgeous forests, in a small clearing, sitting at a make-shift table that stretched nearly the lenght of the feild, though only, I would say, about four feet wide. It was covered in food, and drink, and toys, and the most beautiful bronze plates and silver forks, and golden, jeweled cups.
And all around were beautiful women ranging any age from 15 to 35, in different outfits, ranging from skimpy and tight, to loose and billowing.
And in these dreams, among the Maenads, I would sit in the lap of the most beautiful young man, with lightly curling, soft brown hair, and the most soft hazel eyes. And he was Bacchus, he was Dionysus. And he would call me petnames, like white daughter, sweet heart, dear heart, and beautiful child of whitefire.
And so it was that in my dreams, I would sit among these gorgeous adults, and drink grape juice, and eat all kinds of meats, and breads, and cheeses, and fruits. Anything my heart desired, my Bacchus had there for me.
And he would talk to me, comfort me, sing to me, or simply hold me as I spoke of the things I had needed to get off my heavy heart. He spoiled me, and he treated me gently, and he loved me.
And really, this God was my father. Not by blood, oh no. But because that was the role he seemed to play for me in these dreams. My own father I saw rarely, because he would work all day, until late at night.
And so, I worshipped this beautiful man who would presume to be my father-figure. I loved, and honored, and worshipped him. And when I was old enough, I began to research his name, and one night, during the dream, I called him Dionysus. And he smiled. It had seemed he had wanted me to figure out his identity on my own.
And more recently I found out why he used the nicknames with the word white in them. You see, my real name, Candice, is an ancient Greek word. It means, roughly translated, white, whiteness, whitefire, or glowing. This was a sign. You see, this mean that I was meant to follow the Greek Pantheon. This Greek God, and this Greek name of my own.
And so, here I am, a Pagan born, a Pagan raised, and a Pagan I shall die. I was not so much drawn to my path, as I was born to it. Destined to it. And now I am immersed in it.
I hope you can understand.
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Posted: Sun Jan 14, 2007 5:59 pm
Wow, that's amazing. How wonderful for you.
Personally, I was raised in a church of Christianity known as Unity, and my family was in the inner core of the church. Now, the thing about Unity is that, besides some core values, each church is a community of it's own, and everyone may have their own personal beliefs. In the inner group oh Unity of Fort Worth (and probably most Unities, but I'm not sure) there was a lot of belief in mystism, etc. That is how I got my introduction of some of my core values.
In the meantime, my Stepmom was having visions. She knew that she would get a group of women together for a retreat once a year, and that now was the time to act. She found Earthsprings, where the Spiritwomen started to meet in the fall. Earthsprings quickly became our church home, and I got my introduction into Native American values. I still often refer to myself as Shamanistic, though recently I realise that that is the basis for many of my beliefs, and my religon as per religon is nonexistant. Rather, my belief system is a spirituality, and I do not follow a god per say, but rather a source of infinite and total energy. This often manifests itself, and everything has some of it inside it, but the only forms I believe we can work with are archetypes, such as totems, familiars, and gods/godesses.
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