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 Posted: Fri Dec 22, 2006 1:42 pm
Am going to start this journal thing, then I won't just keep bumping up my thread in the main forum every time I feel a bit odd. Comments and such are welcome.
I really need to come on Gaia more often, don't I? sweatdrop
In November, I did a whole bout of SI. My best 'friend' had to leave college. Was v. depressed. Refused to talk to people. I still see her quite often though.
Since then though, it's been pretty ok, except now I feel kinda empty. This just came on yesterday, so I'm not too worried about it at the moment. I'm just hoping that it doesn't carry on for much longer. ^^;
God damn you, Amy! I must see you before Christmas! gonk
She could at least phone me or something. She's hardly been on MSN at all this week... crying
I do not feel christmasy. At all. It's kinda odd.
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Posted: Sat Dec 23, 2006 12:17 pm
I've been bored out of my mind today. I've watched TV, played on RO, had a quick lurk around Gaia....Urgh. Nothing to do. I tried phoning Amy again, to see if she'd entertain me. Her phone was on this time, but she didn't answer it. Bah.
I still haven't gone Christmas shopping. sweatdrop
It looks like no one will get any presents from me this year! xd
Tomorrow I'm gonna have to go into town and buy a CD for my sister. Bah. I'm really gonna die out there. I have a terrible fear of crowds - All those people, all those voices.... I'll have to drag someone out there with me. crying
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Posted: Wed Dec 27, 2006 8:06 am
Talked to Amy on the phone on Christmas Day!~~~ w00!
The 25th was pretty boring. Just your usual family stoof + presents.
Boxing day - had the urge to go and slice the hell out of my hip again, but didn't. Yay! ^_^
I feel so proud of myself.
The scar on my wrist has been really bothering me lately. I've switched my wristband from right to left so I don't have to look at it. Usually, it doesn't bother me. I don't know why it's irritating me so.
Bah. xp
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Posted: Thu Dec 28, 2006 1:13 pm
I went into town today for a mooch. I was completely freaked out by the amount of people there. I've been places with many, many more people, but it's never freaked me out this much. I was breathing really fast and stuff. I had my CD player on, so that kept me from going into a full-scale panic. In between tracks, however, I could hear the voices of everyone around me, so clearly. I was just unable to block them out. I turned my CD up, and eventually the feeling wore off. I kept thinking that people were looking at me though... eek
Bah. This never used to happen...
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Posted: Sat Dec 30, 2006 6:20 am
Urgh. I couldn't resist it any more. I've got a new collection of cuts on my hip again. Only a couple though. I'd nearly gone a whole month too! gonk
This time of year really screws me up. It was the same last year too.
I'm mostly ok though. Nothing major ha happened as of yet, like in January. If I go like that again, I'm definately going to get something done about it.
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Posted: Tue Jan 02, 2007 3:25 pm
I swear I keep hearing my name being said...
Well, I did this afternoon anyway... gonk
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Posted: Mon Feb 05, 2007 1:07 pm
Exo wishes that she was someone else right now...
I am depressed. I hate it.
Actually, I'm not depressed. I'm cynical about life. My life. It sucks.
No, I don't want to die.
I want to live.
Just not like this.
Urgh....
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Posted: Thu Feb 22, 2007 10:42 am
I freaking cut my wrist last week. ~_~
The bladey thing had been in my pocket, so it was moderately blunt.
That was a very, very good thing.
It's mostly healed up now. Yay.
I don't know what came over me. I was doing so well too...
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