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Old lyrics written for a fictional band named Dameisele Papillon that one of my characters, Rez, is in....


Dameisele Papillon
'Sin for the Willow'
"Welcome"
By: Rez
Vocals: Rez Kushami-Ekajata


Curiosity killed the cat
But he was unaware
He kept living out his life
Ignoring all the stares

Curiosity killed the cat
And on the day he died
He was told he was okay
But the person asked had lied

The cat
The cat
The cat died today
The cat
The cat
The cat went out to play

Welcome to wonderland

Once upon a time there lived
A girl who dreamed enough
She waited out her whole long life
But never found true love

Once upon a time there lived
A princess with regrets
Unhappy with plain happiness
The girl the tale forgets

A girl
A girl
A girl lost in her mind
A girl
A girl
A girl no one will find

Welcome to wonderland

Who seeks the answers?
Who writes the lines?
Old questions put to newer words
Documented by the blind

[we're in wonderland]

To each his own the saying goes
When everyone is poor
There's ones above the others
Closing all the doors

To each his own the saying goes
But it never seems enough
Drowning in the mess we breed
Murdered by our lust

To all
To all
To all we give you hate
To all
To all
To all those falsely great

Welcome to wonderland

When you're older you will see
What is wrong with you
All the problems made by me
That you're crawling through

When you're older you will see
That life is full of tears
Running onwards endlessly
Does not escape your fears

For you
For you
For you there's ample time
For you
For you
For you we'll draw the line

Welcome to wonderland

Who seeks the answers?
Who writes the lines?
Old questions put to newer words
Documented by the blind

The cat didn't know
The girl couldn't show
Everyone is lost
And you will pay the cost

Welcome to wonderland
[we're all in wonderland]

Old lyrics written for a fictional band named Dameisele Papillon that one of my characters, Rez, is in....


Dameisele Papillon
'Holy Betrayal'
"You Remind Me Of My Mother"
By: Rez
Vocals: Rez Kushami-Ekajata


You remind me of my mother
You're a b***h just like her
You remind me of my mother
You don't know what the ******** is wrong

You remind me of my mother
You can be sweet just like her
You remind me of my mother
You don't know where the ******** you are

And I can see it in your eyes
That I'm hurting you
You know I didn't mean to

But you remind me of my mother

You remind me of my mother
You never let me explain
You remind me of my mother
You don't know how the ******** I feel

You remind me of my mother
You always smile when you're down
You remind me of my mother
You don't know who the ******** you are

And I can see it in your eyes
That I'm hurting you
You know I didn't mean to

But you remind me of my mother
You're just like her
And you remind me of my mother
I don't know when the ******** it's gonna change

Because you remind me of my mother

Old lyrics written for a fictional band named Dameisele Papillon that one of my characters, Rez, is in....


Dameisele Papillon
'Holy Betrayal'
"Stronger Than You Think"
By: Rez
Vocals: Rez Kushami-Ekajata
Backup Vocals: Ame Megami


The pain you put inside
Is laced with gentle fears
All the cries that you make
That no one ever hears

The feeling gives me pleasure
The sensation drives me wild
I love it when you tease me
And beat me like a child

And you know that you can trust me
To do what you want
So believe that you can't break me
And give me all you've got

I refuse to cry
Whenever you hurt me
I'll never cry
When you push me down
I'm gonna live
Through whatever you give me
I'll only cry
When no one is around

It confuses you to feel me
It angers you to bleed
The punishment you give me
May be what I need

You're shallow and I'm broken
You're bruised and I'm torn
You hate whatever I'm doing to you
But I enjoy the scorn

And you know that you can trust me
To do what you want
So believe that you can't break me
And give me all you've got

I refuse to cry
Whenever you hurt me
I'll never cry
When you push me down
I'm gonna live
Through whatever you give me
I'll only cry
When no one is around

You hurt me with your body
I hurt you with my mind
I'll wriggle into your subconscious
Into a place you'll never find

The more you dominate me
The more that I dig in
I don't care if you degrade me
So long as I still win

And you know that you can trust me
To do what you want
So believe that you can't break me
And give me all you've got

I refuse to cry
Whenever you hurt me
I'll never cry
When you push me down
I'm gonna live
Through whatever you give me
I'll only cry
When no one is around

I'm stronger than you think
I'll never let you win
You'll never see how much it hurts me
I won't give in

And you know that you can trust me
To do what you want
So believe that you can't break me
And give me all you've got

I refuse to cry
Whenever you hurt me
I'll never cry
When you push me down
I'm gonna live
Through whatever you give me
I'll only cry
When no one is around

I refuse to cry
I'll never cry
I'm gonna live

I'm gonna cry

Old lyrics written for a fictional band named Dameisele Papillon that one of my characters, Rez, is in....


Dameisele Papillon
'Gender Masochism'
"Why Bother"
By: Rez
Vocals: Rez Kushami-Ekajata
Backup Vocals: Akuji Peacecraft, Jiro Kumiyugo


What does it matter to you?
[why do you bother?]
What does it matter for me?
[why should I bother?]
What does it matter at all?
[why bother?]

You talk of how you'd hurt me
But you don't want me to leave
You're saying you can't love me
But I find that hard to believe

I'm sick of all these games you have
It's blowing out my mind
You never seem to understand ******** it, nevermind

If emptiness is all there is
Well, I can live with that
But there has to be some compensation
To keep me where I'm at

I don't mind it if you hurt me
It doesn't scare me if I bleed
Sometimes I might deserve it
Sometimes it's what I need

If you hate me
I can fear you
You degrade me
But I need you

What does it matter to you?
[why do you bother?]
What does it matter for me?
[why should I bother?]
What does it matter at all?
[why bother?]

You are the one I run to
To keep me safe from myself
Sometimes I think I'll fall apart
And you're the only thing that helps

The pain can get unbearable
But you're that common ground
I'll do fine, and I'll survive
So long as you're around

Sometimes I fear the things I do
Sometimes I don't even understand
But it's a welcome comfort
To feel your skin under my hands

I'd tell you that I love you
But that doesn't count as much
You are my only self-defense
You revive me with your touch

If you love me
I could hurt you
You don't need me
But I want you

What does it matter to you?
[why do you bother?]
What does it matter for me?
[why should I bother?]
What does it matter at all?
[why bother?]

None of you can have me
None of you can have me
None of you can have me
I'll do what I want

None of you will hurt me
None of you will hurt me
None of you will hurt me
I'm gonna feel how I want

No one even hears me
No one even hears me
No one even hears me
What does it matter what I want?

Why bother?

Old lyrics written for a fictional band named Dameisele Papillon that one of my characters, Rez, is in....


Dameisele Papillon
'Savior Serenade'
"What It's For"
By: Rez
Vocals: Ame Megami
Spoken: Rez Kushami-Ekajata
Backup Vocals: Rez Kushami-Ekajata


When I was younger
I used to believe
That things would get easier as I got older
I'd grow up
Fall in love
Get married
Have a family
Grow old
And watch my children going through all the same things
Making the same mistakes
Having the same achievements
But just a little different
Everything was ordered
It was schedualed
It all had a place
And it would all happen eventually and peacefully

I never imagined
That things would've turned out the way they did
With you
With me
With everything
It's all completely different from what I imagined
There's no white picket fence
No house on the lake
Never a walk at sunset
Hardly any emotion at all
None of that is here

I guess I might've expected too much
Or maybe made too many mistakes
But what can be done about it now?
Nothing really
Everything is just ******** up
But I guess
Over time
As you get older
Things'll get easier

Everything is easy
Everything is easy
It's all fine
Except for the pain
Everyone is happy
Everyone is happy
It all goes alright
If you just ignore the pain

I lay awake at night
Thinking of things
Everything that's happened up till now
Trying to find a reason
I'll think about the past
The present
The future
None of it really makes sense
It's like looking through a puddle
To see what's one the other side of smoked glass
It baffles me sometimes
How did things get this way?
When did they change from what they were?
Were they different?
Or am I just dreaming all of this s**t up?

I begin to realize
That I've never really been happy
I can remember smiling about things
But nothing worthwhile
And it was always just momentary
I didn't really have a bad childhood
Just
Well
An uneventful one
Things happened
Of course
But it was nothing worth mentioning to you

In the middle of my thoughts
I remember that you're there
In the room
Beside me
But not with me
You're strange like that
Always distant
Trying to act like you don't care
But I know that's not how it is
Not entirely
Not really
Otherwise you wouldn't be here at all
Would you?

Everything is easy
Everything is easy
It's all fine
Except for the pain
Everyone is happy
Everyone is happy
It all goes alright
If you just ignore the pain

I'm beginning to understand you
Or at least
I think I do
I can't quite figure out what made you this way
But you don't like things to be
Well
How should I put this?
You want to be in control
Not just of me
Of yourself too
It scares you to be around me sometimes
Because I start to wear down all your resistance
I leave you out in the open
Away from your shell
Where things like emotions can hurt you

I apologize for that
I don't really mean to
But
I guess that's part of the reason you're here
You want this
You're afraid of it
But you want it
You want me to win
You want me to make you feel things
You're trapped
And somewhere
In your subconscious mind
You think that I might hold the key
To setting you free from it all

I'm scared too
Not of you
But
Of what I might be doing to you
My company is affecting you
But
Do I want you to change?
If whatever I'm doing
Is making you different
What will happen in the end?
Will you still be you?
Or
Will you be someone different?
What if whatever I do
Causes bad instead of good?

Everything is easy
Everything is easy
It's all fine
Except for the pain
Everyone is happy
Everyone is happy
It all goes alright
If you just ignore the pain

I'm not doing it on purpose
I'm not trying to change your mind
I'm fine with you how you are
And that's with all your insecurities
Problems
Anger issues
Violent tendencies
And the neglect
I'm fine with it
I really couldn't give a damn
About how many marks you put on my skin
About how many tears I deny crying
Or any of the other s**t you put me though

I usually enjoy it
Usually
I can't say I've never dreamed
Of us having more
But I know that's not you
So I won't push it
Things aren't the best they could be
But I can live with it
I'm not trying to twist you to my ideals
I don't want to
That's one of the most moronic things
I've ever heard

If you wanna beat me
Beat me
If you wanna kiss me
Fine
If you wanna ******** all for it
But I'll never tell you to love me
I don't really care
Love is an uncomfortable thing
It hurts
It ******** with your mind
And screws up your judgment
It makes you do things you normally wouldn't do
I don't wanna do that to you

Everything is easy
Everything is easy
It's all fine
Except for the pain
Everyone is happy
Everyone is happy
It all goes alright
If you just ignore the pain

It sounds like I'm pushing you away
I'm not really
I'm just
Scared
See?
You're doing the same things to me
As I'm doing to you
It really sucks
I'd love to love you
And have you love me
But
When things like that happen
You have to give up a bit of yourself too
And I
I really don't know if I wanna do that
I'm being selfish
I know
But
Would it even really be us?
Or
More to my point
Would I be me?
If all this changes us
Then are we really the people we wanted to love?
I don't know
Maybe I just think too much
Whatever

Everything is easy
Everything is easy
It's all fine
Except for the pain
Everyone is happy
Everyone is happy
It all goes alright
If you just ignore the pain

Everything is easy
Everything is easy
It's all fine
Except for the pain
Everyone is happy
Everyone is happy
It all goes alright
If you just ignore the pain

But what is it for?

Old lyrics written for a fictional band named Dameisele Papillon that one of my characters, Rez, is in....


Dameisele Papillon
'Sado for the Masses'
"Just Confused"
By: Rez
Vocals: Rez Kushami-Ekajata


I'm so ******** confused
I'm so ******** confused
I'm so ******** confused
I'm so ******** confused

This all confuses me
More than you'd believe
I'm having all these thoughts
But none make sense to ******** confusion
It's digging into me
There's nothing there but nothingness
But that's not what I see

Should I do this?
Should I hate you?
Should I give in?
Can I love you?

I'm just ******** confused

You don't know what you're doing
But it really throws me off
It's hurting me from inside out
But I don't want you to stop
I know I don't belong here
But I'm never gonna leave
I'd survive without you
But I don't know where I'd be

Should I do this?
Should I hate you?
Should I give in?
Can I love you?

I'm just ******** confused

Lost in my own problems
Wading blind through yours
I'll never know just what I want
But what I need is more
You give me plenty of your time
To come to my own terms
But that only makes it worse for me
'Cause I can't put it into words

Should I do this?
Should I hate you?
Should I give in?
Can I love you?

I'm just ******** confused

I can't help but wonder
If this is really what I want
I might be wrong in doing this
But it's all that I've got
Confusion is a b***h to me
It keeps me nice and blind
Turning me in circles
With no concept of place or time

Should I do this?
Should I hate you?
Should I give in?
Can I love you?

I'm so ******** confused
I'm so ******** confused
I'm so ******** confused
I'm so ******** confused

Can I do this?
Could I hate you?
Did I give in?
Do I love you?

I'm just ******** confused

Old lyrics written for a fictional band named Dameisele Papillon that one of my characters, Rez, is in....


Dameisele Papillon
'Scratch and Burn'
"These Paranoias"
By: Rez
Vocals: Rez Kushami-Ekajata


Am I hurting you
While you're hurting me?
Are there things in you
That I've yet to see?
Fear turns to comfort
And then it fades away
Things start feeling hollow
From freshness to decay

I'm making up inside my mind
All these paranoias
Reality bends, I lose my sight
Through all these paranoias
I can't remember if this is right
With all these paranoias

You look at me
And I feel pain
I don't know why
Or what I've gained
I try not to notice
The hurt that's in your eyes
But in the end I realize
That I'm not surprised

Where did all this come from?
I don't even remember my way here

I try to ignore
The fact that I'm confused
Why am I the victem
If it's you who's being used?
Are you happy here
Or is that too a dream?
Lately I can't tell
If things are what they seem

I'm making up inside my mind
All these paranoias
Reality bends, I lose my sight
Through all these paranoias
I can't remember if this is right
With all these paranoias

Where did all this come from?
I don't even remember my way here

Am I worried over nothing?
Is everything fine?
Or is it selfish of me to think
That everything is mine?
I don't want to let you down
And I'll never let you go
But things are feeling different
Even if it's slow

I'm making up inside my mind
All these paranoias
Reality bends, I lose my sight
Through all these paranoias
I can't remember if this is right
With all these paranoias

I just want to get away
From all these paranoias
I can't tell if it's the same
Too many paranoias
Am I the only one in pain
From all these paranoias

Where did all this come from?
I don't even remember my way here
Too many paranoias