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When I got here to Mississippi I had started hating it cause of certain things goin on. My mother and I went to the shop to see her employees and then took me to the house. We drove up and she told me to stay in the car and she would go in and get my daughters but before she got out of the car she said no mind games. I got out of the car as fast as I could grabbed hold of my daughters and hugged them and told them I have missed them so dearly. We all went up stairs and they were both so full of energy and just seeing them it gave me loads of energy. They both wanted to show me stuff and things. I saw all three bedrooms and noticed how the house looked kinda amazed. I knew in a few days it would be my oldest's birthday and Shalena deffinitly had a faubulous birthday. My mothers dogs Boss and Dane there rotrilers. They were even at the party and that was a mess and a half. Well next day we all got up and I went to work with my mother and loathed every minute of it...I will stop now so I dont bore anyone.... stressed

All I can say is going to work with my mother was one of the worst things I could've ever done. I ran the cash register some stocked some things. I didnt really mind stocking the shelves much. Yes I got a long with everyone that worked there too. My mother told me also that I could'nt take a trip any where with my step father. My oldest daughter Shalena turning 5 that year was giddy and estatic wanted everything in the world. Yes I even got something for her sister and my mother hated me for that. I told my mother she needed to get over it cause they are my baby's. Dont get me wrong I love my mother but she can get really irritating at times. I did move out a few times cause I could'nt deal with my mother's rules and stuff. Some times my mother got selective memory when she didnt want to deal with somethings. God I miss my baby's dearly with all my heart and soul, I cant stand everyone telling me to be happy cause my baby's are my haqppiness.....big huge bear hugs for my baby's whee

Missing my baby's terribly I feel that Im losing my mind most of the time. I know that life has to get better some how just not sure how though. Me seeing my baby's grow up some before they left, those I can say where precious moments for me. The way I see it in my heart I have 3 little angels, my daughter up in heaven and my daughters here. My mule account is LilSue84 Im not sure if that makes me weird, stupid, or foolish. For some reason since I made that account I kinda feel nearer to her. Everyone here thinks its bad for me to have made the account like that. Wishing that I could be holding my daughters in my arms, all 3 of them...hugs. sad smile

Jeanne I do so much appreciate you saying that......hugs

Sorry about all this my mind gets scrambled so easy at times. I hope I dont scramble everyone's mind doin it this way. It all started when I was 18 and about to graduate from high school. I had an asthma attack my mother took me to the hospital and thats also how I found out I was pregnant. When my mother found out she told me she wasnt hearing of this. She told me she wasnt ready to be a grandma and was embarrassed cause my grandma was coming to my graduation and my mother took me to a planned parenthood place where the lady's were very nice to me. One lady took me to the side and talked with me and asked if I wanted to abord my baby and I said no of course but I was afraid of what my mother would do to me. My mother and I went home and talked and she told me I was a baby my self and didnt know anything about taking care of baby's. We had went back to that place and the lady's said to me and my mother that we had to do it soon cause they wouldnt be able to do it in a few days. I wanted to keep my baby but just the look on my mothers face scared me to death. One of the lady's took me into a room told me to put on this gown they put me on the table and told me to relax and it might hurt. When I heard the vaccum come on I was already in tears and told my self that I hated my mother for this. The next day I went to school and saw my friend that got pregnant at the same time as me and I asked her what is goin on, my mother wouldnt let me keep my pregnancy but she had told me her mother had told her that she was gonna lose her freedom of fun. When we graduated a little while later she had her baby and he was beautiful. I hated my mother so much that after I asked her to take me shopping and stuff, I waited one day when she left to go to work I packed some stuff of mine up and started walking and got picked up by a very nice couple....sorry need to stop for now *hugs*

Moma, I am so very very sorry. (((((HUGS)))))

My mother wanted me to do the same, I got pregnant with my first at 18 also. But I wasn't living at home.

I am sorry, I didn't mean to say anything upsetting. Night Moma. heart

Moma, your past has touched me. I am realy sorry for all that you have had to endure. It makes me realy sad for you. I never stop to think about what could have been wrong whenever you felt down when I would answere your posts. I am so Sorry cry *hugs*