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 Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2007 1:31 pm
Weyekin sat at the edge of a small cliff, the view a calming sight to her soul. There was still a bit of snow on the ground from the night before, but it was clear that spring was just around the corner. The air had a tinge of greeness to it...of buds just about to burst through the thawing ground as the earth was reborn as it is every spring. Oh how she looked forward to this time every year! For once, she looked totally relaxed, her ears perked as she took in every sound she could.
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Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2007 2:11 pm
Matsi breathed in the crisp, cool air. It was refreshing compared to the biting frost air there'd been in the cold months. He sniffed the air, taking in every little speck of scent. There were prey animals to his right, but he was not hungry, and a fox slept like a rock to his left (he could hear the large, sighing sleep breaths). But One scent stood out the most. Another member of Sawtooth was near. He sniffed again, this time lower to the ground. "Weyekin." He whispered.
He moved forward, allowing some noise so she would know he was there, but not be startled. She seemed relaxed when he first saw her. It was odd to see her this way, he was used to her being alert and tense.
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Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2007 2:40 pm
Weyekin had smelled other wolves in the wind and air, but ignored those scents altogether until she heard a bit of noise behind her. Alert to danger, she immediatly turned to see what it was, a bit surprised to see Matsi approaching. Lowering her ears and head in a gesture of submittance, she wondered if she was in trouble for something, though his actions didn't seem to suggest it by first glance. Getting up, she kept low to the ground, as if just waiting for the signal to either bolt, or roll over and accept whatever "punishment" she might be in for.
Being the Omega, she rarely interacted much with the others of her pack, keeping mainly to herself and always the loner on the edge. It was a position she'd been forced into and finally accepted as a puppy, as her displays of dominance had led her siblings to ganging up on her in a bunch until she rolled over and submitted to all of their whims. It was easier than fighting a losing battle and being killed, after all, since being dead would do one no good. The temptation, however, always existed to just leave and start over and find herself a mate, but the option wasn't open for debate. Life and curcumstances had seen to that fate.
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Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2007 2:53 pm
When she tensed and got low into a submissive form Matsi felt like slapping himself. He did not like to see any wolf have to constantly be on their gaurd and be ready to run. It was just not his way.
He nodded, signalling that she could get up. "I'm not here to punish you, Weyekin." He stated in a kind voice. "I just smelled you on the wind and wondered what you were up to." He moved and sat beside her calmly. "Beautiful day out."
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Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2007 3:02 pm
Weyekin didn't move for a moment, her tail tucked between her legs, despite his reassurances that she wasn't in trouble, or someone's scapegoat. To be honest...she was very afraid, and unsure what to do next. This sort of kindness wasn't something she was particularly used to from any wolf, outside of Lakota who was the only one who really understood the kind of position she was in, though she still only rarely talked to him either. Lowering herself a little closer to the ground, she appeared to relax slightly, though she still had the look of a terrified rabbit about to bolt at the slightest threat. "Yes, it is," was all she could manage to say, her voice warm, friendly and soft but with a guarded edge to it. Why would one such as he be curious about her? She was of no consequence to him....
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Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2007 3:28 pm
Matsi watched her again. How could a creature as majestic as they be brought down to sucha pitiful level? It didn't seem right. He nudged her shoulder quickly with his nose. "On my honor, I promise I will not hurt you." He said calmly.
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Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2007 3:41 pm
Weyekin visibly flinched and took a step back, actually expecting to be nipped or something..but nudged? It just didn't seem right. Deciding to be bold, and risk being punished for her actions, she asked quietly, "Then why did you seek me out if not to punish me? I'm of no consequence to you or the others." It was true that if something went wrong, she was the one they sought out to "punish" and relieve some of their frustrations for having made a mistake of some sort...an action not quite common to the Beta or Alphas, but more to the lower ranks who might feel it their right to show their dominance over her. "I am not usually sought out for company's sake."
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Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2007 3:52 pm
Matsi thought over her question. "You think that because of you're rank, you are not worthy of someone's company, correct? These silly thoughts should be cast away at once if you ever wish you releive yourself of this horrible position. Yes, some will seek you out to 'punish' you, as you say, but you must learn to take that with pride. If some of us were put into your position, it would be hard for us to adapt. You, though, strive in a way." He shrugged. "I do not beleive rank should tear a pack apart. Strong packs will hold together and defend eachother, no matter what rank. Does this answer your question?"
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Posted: Thu Mar 15, 2007 10:04 am
Weyekin settled herself on the ground, slowly relaxing, but still not letting down her mental guard. Her voice was still soft with a hint of sadness to it, "Aah...I take it Lakota's talk to you about what I told him, that I was unhappy, yes?" She chuckled a little more to herself than to anyone. "I should of known he'd tell you, as you two are pretty close. Forgive my boldness, but let me clear this up for you. I strive because life has given me no other choice outside of death, and I'm not stupid enough to consider death a choice. I would of left years ago, perhaps to find a mate of my own, but life has also taken that choice away and so I remain. I take pride in the fact that I'm alive, that I've survived everything life has thrown at me so far. I take pride in the pack, and would die for it if the need arose....however, my rank is the lowest, so how does one take pride in that?
"I'm the last to eat, if there is anything left. I usually have to find my own meals and hide so that whatever I get someone else doesn't take away just because they're higher ranking in the pack. Someone gets punished, I'm usually next in line to be used as a punching bag, unless they are fast talkers and figure out a way to blame it on me. I'm the pack's scapegoat, and to talk to me means risking your own rank. Anything more and you risk your life in defending my honor. There is much that I wish I could have, but I accept things as they are, for there is no other choice given to me."
She wanted him to understand that she understood what he was risking even talking to her, however grateful she may be for the company despite how she acted towards him. She fully accepted her role as an Omega, but she took no honor or pride in what she was forced to do outside of surviving day by day. The only role she longed to have, since becoming Beta femme was out of the question (who would actually want to listen to someone who's been their punching bag for years, after all) was to become a pup sitter...guardian of the young, and also their teacher, but in order to attain that role, she would have to rise in the ranks. However, that meant she'd need an ally to stand by her side...effectively, her mate as the battles would be never-ending for quite sometime and to rise that far meant he'd have to be in serious love with her to risk everything. She looked up at Matsi, a bit of hope springing inside despite how hard she tried to fight it back down. It'd take a miracle for him to risk his rank, not to mention his life, to help her....but he'd also be her best hope at her dream. To risk one's position or life is not something she would ask of anyone, however, so she turned her attention back to the view before them, relaxing a bit more as she let the wind wash her thoughts away and empty her mind.
"Matsi...I want you to understand this. I'm not fatalistic, I'm realistic. I understand my place in the pack and accept it, even if it's not always fair or right, I accept it with as much dignity as possible. Like I said, I'm willing to die for the pack, but there's not a soul who would die defending me. If there's one thing I learned, it's that the only one you can depend on is yourself. It's the law of the Wild after all, though I doubt you came here to hear my views on such." All that had to be the most she'd ever said to any wolf ever...she wondered how surprised about that he'd be.
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Posted: Thu Mar 15, 2007 11:53 am
Matsi had to admitt that he was glad to here her speaking more then a simple short answer. He felt things were the way they were to naturally be, now. One should not be on gaurd when sitting next to their own pack brothren. He listened to her words, and let them sink in.
"Lakota has told me nothing of your emotions. You are as much of a mystery to me as the stars in the sky. To find something to have pride for when in such a low position shows strength.
"I realize what I risk in speaking with you. I know all these 'natural laws', but this is not the way mother nature intended wolves to live. We live together to help one another. No one should be left out from this. It is not my place to say that the Alphas do not know what they are doing, but if I were alpha, things would change. Again I tell you, I know exactly what I am risking here." He emphasized his last sentance, showing know sign of worry nor fear.
"I understand what you are telling me though, do not get me wrong."
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Posted: Fri Mar 16, 2007 3:30 pm
Weyekin laughed, now completely relaxed as she lay on the ground her ears no longer plastered to her head in submittance, "I just wish the others understood as well as you seem to. It may not be how it should be, but that's often exactly how things are, if you get my point. There is one who will always be appointed the leader, then there is my position. The two of us should be treated with the same respect as we both have the same purpose, which is the protection and the future of the pack, but that's not often how it is...maybe the reason for that is that it's easy to find someone to put in my place, whereas leaders like you and Kamots are rare finds therefor things to be treasured. Whereas I'm replaceable in a heartbeat and who cares if anything were to really happen to me? My death, unlike yours, wouldn't be cause for much grief, I assure you."
She decided to lay it all on the line for a moment, just to kinda feel things out with him. He seemed to accept her brute honesty, and she liked that about him...she was beginging to understand why he and Lakota were friends, something that had previously been a mystery to her. Keeping her gaze away from him, though watching for a reaction through her periferal vision, she said, "To be honest, I wish I could have a higher rank. The main reason I accept where I am at is because I don't know a wolf who would want to listen to someone who had been their punching bag for so long give out orders." She laughed, assuming he might of been thinking she was referring to being the Beta Female. "No, it's not the Beta rank, though I assure you I wouldn't complain, but...it's to be the guardian of the pups. To watch them grow up, teach them compassion and the right ways of nature...the way things should be. To guard them from harm and see them grow and mature. That is what I wish for most. The thing about puppies versus adults is that they woudn't see me as the Omega...but as their teacher and playmate. To them, I am an equal, something I wish all wolves felt for their packmates, and a lesson I would like to teach them...to accept everyone no matter their rank."
((The fact that her name means Spirit Guardian has been on my mind alot, and all I can think about is how good she'd be with puppies, guarding their spirits/lives and teaching them how things should be, but not always are....leading them down the good path of life...))
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Posted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 9:37 am
"No one is completely replacable. Everyone has a special trait that is hard to come by, and everyone has a trait that others will not like." Matsi stared off to the horizon with a peaceful smile.
Gaurdian of the pups. He thought of the possibility. She would have the protective nature, and know all about what is right and wrong, from her experiences as Omega. She would certainly do well working with Amani as well, he knew his brother would be kind to the female. Maybe it wasn't as far out as she thought... "I could see what I can do for you... I know that it may be hard to convince anyone to allow you to move up in rank, and it will take time and effort... But I think we can do it together." He looked at her with friendly and understanding eyes. In them was a promise, for he thought she deserved to be respected for all she had gone through.
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Posted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 10:05 am
Weyekin looked in his eyes for a long moment, searching them, and accepting what she saw there. If things didn't work out as she dreamed, she would accept it and move on with life as she did every day, though she would owe Matsi everything no matter what. "Thank you," she whispered, reaching up to nuzzle him softly on the cheek with her nose. For the first time she felt like she had a friend, and confidant outside of Lakota. Her emotions started welling up, and though she did her best to supress them a she usually did, she couldn't stop a single tear from falling down her cheek. "Thank you."
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Posted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 10:14 am
Matsi was surprised at the nuzzle at first, not expecting such from such a protective female, but nuzzled her back gently. He whiped the tear away with his paw. "Do not thank me. You deserve much better than what you are recieving, and I feel bad that I did not try and stop this treatment earlier. Forgive me."
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Posted: Mon Apr 02, 2007 10:35 am
She laughed a lightly, partially uncomfortable for even showing that much emotion to another. She wasn't used to this kind of attention, the loving touch of another wolf, and had to admit she was enjoying it. "If I blamed you for anything that has happened to me in the past, you'd of known by now. I've accepted this lot as my role in life for the others, and it is my choice to continue on as I have done so. I may not be able to leave this place physically, but you certainly know there are others choices I could have made to guarantee I wouldn't be here today if I'd so wanted to." She most certainly could of guaranteed her death by now if that was something she'd wanted, but life held too many wonders for her eyes to behold to want to leave it before her time. Today was a gift, one she would cherish in her heart, during all the hard times she knew was to come. "I do forgive you though."
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