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 Posted: Sun Apr 22, 2007 3:59 pm
Okay, so my best friend has just started dating this guy and she is letting it go to her head. I mean I'm happy for her and all, cause she deserves a guy who cares about her. But, all of a sudden her friendship with me has moved from 1st priority to 2nd. I don't like it one bit. It's not that we don't get to hang out anymore, cause we do. It's just this: she has a more open relationship with him than me and her do. If she feels that she has a problem with me, she runs to her boyfriend and talks about it to him instead of coming to me with it. I mean, the problem is about me afterall. Like this past week, she felt like I was too flirty with some of the guys at our school. I admit it, yeah I am. But she thinks that Im going to get "too involved" with a guy and then things are going to end up for the worst. So, she went and told her boyfriend and then he started making rumors like the big jerk he is. And then when I ask her about it, she completely denies it. She says that he made it up on his own. Eventually, I found out it started with her. I was pissed. It's like where is the trust with her? What happened to that?
Now my question is, am I overreacting? Should I just let her enjoy the ride with this guy and shut my big mouth? Should I just be happy for her and deal with the new change?
ADVICE, PLEASE!
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Posted: Wed May 30, 2007 11:05 am
I know exactly what you are going through. I've had two friends who had done that to me. One was in high school. We'll name her L. Whenever L had a boyfriend, she would ditch all of her friends for that one guy. Although, we still hung out.
Then, it happened again when I come to college. This girl, T, and I became close friends. My friend K had introduced us. At the end of our sophomore year, T, got a boyfriend. Then, it was like we never saw T. Then it became that T couldn't go anywhere without her boyfriend. T would go tell her boyfriend all the problems that she was having with me and K, but she never came to us about them. They were a bunch of lies too. She stopped hanging out with us. She was with her boyfriend 24-7 when not in class. She's stuck up his a**. She completely ditched all friends that she had. The only person she has now is her boyfriend.
You're not overreacting. I know how you feel. As you can see, I've been in your position multiple times. You need to tell her straight up how you feel. Tell her that you don't appreciate being second best to her boyfriend. Why can't both of you be in 1st place to her?
I talked to T about all of that. T chose her boyfriend. T didn't want me and K to be in the same place as her boyfriend. So, we're not friends anymore and never will be.
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Posted: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:52 pm
you should watch last season of The Hills. . .sounds just like it
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Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 9:23 pm
if your friend is truly happy with how things are, you should probably try to adjust to it. No matter how much it may hurt you.
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Posted: Wed Jan 12, 2011 2:46 pm
It doesnt sound like a sincere friendship if she's not being honest with you. Her spending time with a boyfriend is natural, but to change how she talks to and about you is shady.
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