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Tesla Charlatan

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2007 5:52 am
I wasn't quite sure where to post this, so I just posted it in the RP forum. No one's rping anyways, so I might as well post something...
Quote:
Chapter One: Link’s Awakening

I don’t remember the war between the Sheikah and the Gerudo because I was barely six weeks old. According to the Deku Tree, my mother entered the Kokiri’s Forest with me covered in blood, both hers and others’. Begging him to care for her son, my mother died in front of the Deku Tree before he could decide. Legends say that he sensed that I would save Hyrule and decided to take me in; I don’t know if that is true; all I know is that he allowed me to be raised a Kokiri.

The Kokiri were kind and accepting, but there was always that weird feeling of misplacement, like going to a close, tight-knit family reunion when you didn’t grow up with them. Mido, chief of the Kokiri, was the worst about it because he had the biggest crush on Saria who preferred playing with me over him. Every Kokiri received a guardian fairy when they were old enough to join the village, which was at about age 7. If a Kokiri did not receive a fairy by age 13, he/she would become a skull kid. Before they join the village, Kokiri live inside the Deku Tree, where they are instructed by one of the Deku Tree’s two main fairies. When I grew to age seven, I waited for my fairy in the Forest Temple, but she never came. After waiting a year, the Deku Tree gave me a home in the Kokiri Village without a fairy. However, this only made me more of an outcast. Whenever we met, Mido would never call me Link but “Mr. No-Fairy.” Eventually, the name stuck and every single Kokiri would call me that when I tried talking to them. That was probably why I never liked talking.

Only Saria made me feel like a Kokiri, but then again, she always dealt with the non-Kokiri visiting the Forest Temple. When everyone else got their fairies and I had none, I remember Saria took me to the Sacred Forest Meadow and gave me a tour of the Forest Temple, something she never did for anyone else, even Mido. I remember that she wouldn’t let me move into the Lost Woods when I was ten. Refusing to listen, I went and camped out with one of the Skull Kids as my buddy. Eventually, Saria’s closest friend, Nita, came to me and said, “Link, quit being an idiot. Saria is serious when she says that you’ll get your fairy someday. She’s managed to convince her friends never to refer to you as Mr. No-Fairy to your face and everyone else to call you Link whenever she’s around. Now, go visit Saria and apologize for your stupidity.” After that, everyone remained polite around me, except Mido, who continued to be a jerk.
 
PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2007 6:05 am
((Oh, bad Fiora! You shouldn't double post!))
Quote:
Chapter Two: The Beginning of the Adventure

When I turned twelve, I began having nightmares. According to legend, my nightmares were about Ganondorf taking over Hyrule. In actuality, I dreamt that I became a Skull Kid and attacked the King of Hyrule in his customary pilgrimage to the Forest Temple. After waking up from that one and falling asleep again, I would dream that I actually got a fairy, but I had to serve Mido for the rest of my life. Then, I would dream that I wasn’t actually a Kokiri, but a Hylian and I had to leave Kokiri Forest. Those were my customary nightmares. The day before I turned thirteen, Navi woke me up and told me she was my guardian fairy and that the Deku Tree wanted to talk to me.

Navi was probably the most sarcastic fairy I had ever met. I swear that her favorite hobby was hitting me on the head. Our first meeting went something like this:
Navi: Wake up, lazy!
Me: (waking up) Who are you?
Navi: I’m Navi, your guardian fairy. Now, get moving! The Deku Tree wants to see you.
Me: Aren’t you supposed to, you know, give me a history of your life as a Kokiri?
Navi: Okay, you know that all female Kokiri become fairies when they die. I was a female Kokiri; I lived a very good life and was always obedient to the Deku Tree, blah, blah, blah. You know the drill you’ve seen enough Kokiri go through it. Now, get moving!
Me: What about the male Kokiri?
Navi: All of the male Kokiri except for Mido will either become Skull Kids or become part of the Kokiri mother inside the Deku Tree.
Me: What will Mido become?
Navi: Mido will become the only male fairy and serve the Deku Tree as his personal fairy until the next Kokiri to be Chief dies; then, he’ll become the Guardian Fairy of the Chief after that. Okay, you’ve heard everything; now, move it! You shouldn’t keep the Deku Tree waiting.

We finally approached the Deku Tree. What most people don’t realize is that the Deku Tree doesn’t actually speak directly to any Kokiri except the Forest Sage and the Chief of the Kokiri. If he wishes to speak to any other Kokiri, they get the message from their fairies. So, when I approached the Deku Tree and he began speaking in Hylian, the scene went like this:
Deku Tree: Link, King Ganondorf of the Gerudo has cursed me. He has turned the mother of the Kokiri into a destructive arachnid.
Me: (remaining silent)
Navi: The Deku Tree says that this really evil dude with orange hair and a great tan has turned the mother of the Kokiri into a scorpion, spider thingy.
Deku Tree: Link, thou hast shown more skill in the arts of Mars than even Mido. I wish thee to break this curse of mine.
Me: (remaining silent)
Navi: You are better at fighting and stuff like that than Mido is, so the Deku Tree wants you to break his curse.
Deku Tree: Farore has blessed thee with courage indeterminable; wilt thou do as I request?
Me: So, I have to run around inside you, again, and kill this scorpion, spider thing in order to break this curse?
Navi: (hits me on the head) If you understood the Deku Tree, why didn’t you reply?
Me: Because I don’t like talking. That’s why I’m so good at martial arts. I just kill the creatures and ask questions later.

I entered the Deku Tree and saw immediately that there was more to this curse than meets the eye. The doorway to where all the Kokiri over age three lived was no longer a door with a stairway but a hole with some web over it. Navi hit me on the head again and said, “Hey, Link, I forgot to tell you. That really evil dude with the orange hair and the great tan, well, he’s King Ganondorf of the Gerudo.”

Planning out where I needed to go next, I asked, “What does that have to do with my issue of breaking the curse placed upon the Deku Tree?”

If I could’ve seen her eyes, Navi would’ve rolled them. “Didn’t you pay attention in school at the Forest Temple? Gerudo magic, while extremely powerful, always contains within its effects the key to destroying the spell.”

“And, your point is?”

“Link, you stupid ingrate, that means that Ganondorf has placed within here the very things we need in order to break his curse!”

This time I rolled my eyes. “Yes, I did pay attention in school and I knew that. Navi, if you want to be useful, give me a map of this place and locations of all the things I need to break the curse.”

Navi hit me on the head again. “Link, if you knew that, then why are you spending so much time standing still?”

“Stop hitting me on the head! You’ll probably give me a concussion before I can break the curse on the Deku Tree! For your information, I was planning out how I was going to break the curse.”

“Well, then, could you spend less time planning and more time doing. If we hurry, we might be able to save the Deku Tree!”

So, I climbed the wall and found the map. Continuing on to the doorway to the schoolroom, I found a Deku Scrub spitting nuts at me. Shielding myself from his blasts, I hit him with one of his own nuts and captured his home base. When he realized that I had defeated him, he told me something I already knew and ran off. Deku Scrubs are so useful after they’ve been defeated. Continuing to what was the teacher’s office, I managed to find a fairy slingshot. Navi about squealed my ears off. “Oh my dear Farore, Link received his first special weapon. It’s the fairy slingshot! You remember when I accidentally killed all those skulltalas and I got into a lot of trouble with Keri.” Then she went on to explain how to use the fairy slingshot. I simply listened to what she had to say and stuck it within easy reach.

Walking out of the classroom, I looked up the wall and saw the skulltalas preventing me from climbing further up, where the teacher’s lounge was supposed to be. I pulled out my slingshot and killed each one of them with one pellet. Then, I climbed up the wall and saw these huge skulltalas. I walked past them into a room that was supposed to be the principle’s office where I found a piece of paper indicating where all the treasure was located.
((To be edited later when I remember how to get through the rest of the dungeon. But, for now, that will do.))  

Tesla Charlatan


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 03, 2007 1:04 pm
That's really good, and funny.  
PostPosted: Sun Jun 03, 2007 3:32 pm
That's actually what I was heading for. I can't keep my stories serious, so I might as well make them funny. mrgreen *searches for files for chs 3 and 4*  

Tesla Charlatan


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 05, 2007 6:08 pm
I'll be waiting! 3nodding  
PostPosted: Sat Apr 17, 2010 7:02 am
Wow! You've posted in 2007!  

NintendoBandic00t

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