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 Posted: Sun Jun 17, 2007 12:40 pm
OH MY JESUS I'M BORED!
where is everyone!?!?!
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Posted: Sun Jun 17, 2007 12:42 pm
Chuck Norris's girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and ripped out her throat. Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, "Don't ******** with Chuck!" Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast went deaf.
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Posted: Sun Jun 17, 2007 6:50 pm
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Posted: Sat Jul 14, 2007 3:04 pm
Chuck Norris doesn't write messages on paper. He simply writes the message backwards on his boot, then roundhouse kicks you in the chest, printing it nicely upon your shirt.
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Posted: Sat Jul 14, 2007 3:09 pm
y da hell does every 1 talk bout him so much?
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Posted: Sat Jul 14, 2007 3:12 pm
Archaeologists in India uncovered a new dinosaur. Actually, it was several dinosaurs with one dinosaur in the middle. It seems that the the surrounding dinosaurs died from a single roundhouse kick to the face. The Archaeologists wanted to name the middle dinosaur "Chuchnorisaurus", but the Indian government renamed it to the "Himotosaurus", because they knew that Mr. Norris simply can't die.
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Posted: Sat Jul 14, 2007 3:13 pm
Why don't people talk about him as much!? He's the master, the awesome dude, the Beatles of the 21st century....just for saying something like that, Chuck Norris is so fast, he JUST roundhouse kicked you!
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Posted: Sat Jul 14, 2007 3:17 pm
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Posted: Sat Jul 14, 2007 3:24 pm
OK, I'm posting a crap load of facts....NOW!
- When Chuck Norris wants popcorn, he breathes on Nebraska.
- Einstein's original Theory of Relativity was; if Chuck Norris kicks you, your relatives will feel it.
- Chuck Norris is allowed to talk about Fight Club.
- Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
- When taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris" for every answer. You will score over 8000.
- Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
-The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris. There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the footage.
- It takes Chuck Norris 20 seconds to watch an episode of 60 Minutes.
- Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
- It takes 14 puppeteers to make Chuck Norris smile, but only 2 to make him destroy an orphanage.
- Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
- It is believed dinosaurs are extinct due to a giant meteor. That's true if you want to call Chuck Norris a giant meteor.
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Posted: Sat Jul 14, 2007 3:38 pm
did u write dis on ur own?
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Posted: Sat Jul 14, 2007 5:25 pm
X Dark Slayer X did u write dis on ur own?
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Posted: Sat Jul 14, 2007 5:52 pm
Chuck norris has alot of b-rated movies, but don't anyone tell him that. xd
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Posted: Sat Jul 14, 2007 7:28 pm
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Posted: Sun Jul 15, 2007 10:05 am
On the first day Chuck Norris made God... then rested for 6 days
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Posted: Sun Jul 15, 2007 10:38 am
OH MAH JELLEH!!!!!
Those are awesome!!!!
chuck norris is god.
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