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 Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 8:56 am
Umm... this is the prologue for a book I'm getting published, and I just want someone to tell me what they thought. This will be the only chapter written in third person. Anyway, here it goes.
7:33 p.m.
A storm front menacingly crept over a brightly illuminated city. The plasma neon billboards and signs pierce the night giving the environment a sinister yet bright, whimsical, lively feel. Semi-futuristic cars, Eigezz whizzed around the populated street corners, some reaching speeds that rendered them as seemingly intangible blurs. Pedestrians crossed the roads as the traffic lights allowed. The vehicles hovered approximately two-feet off of the ground utilizing their sleek aerodynamic bodies for smooth, comfortable rides. The engine’s low hums permeated the vicinity seeming to generate a delicate harmony with the city’s melodic, nostalgic sounds.
Suddenly a downpour occurred; in turn the citizens drew umbrellas, lifted hoods, and ran to the shelters of awnings. The seemingly paradisiacal metropolis was now enveloped in dimness and despair.
A stature materialized evanescently before the largest high-rise in the city, the king’s palace. His face could not be seen due to the imperiling helmet that rested on his unseen skull. He was fully clad in somber yet majestic body armor. Underneath the breastplate was what could be seen of a flowing black leather coat, which flapped about his armored ankles.
As he ascended the skyscraper’s staircase his coat loomed behind him as though it were a shadow protruding from his obviously potent body. He eloquently climbed further displaying his power as frankly as possible, each step dispersing fright in to the atmosphere. Once at the peak of the flight of stairs he was placed before two guards. The guards stood still at attention defending the entry way at all cost as the armored man fleeted past them unnoticed through the automatic glass doors. It was almost as if he were imperceptible to their senses.
He made his way through the lobby that was imaginatively decorated with exotic floral arrangements and ancient stone statues having yet to be seen or heard, which was surprising due to his…direct approach. He then stopped, armor churning in response; his hand clutched into a fist, knuckles cracking accordingly. He looked around for only a second or two strategically planning out his next move.
With that done the umbrage of a light fixture cleaved to his shadow spawning around his inscrutable form. He was then engulfed by the dusk subsequently fazing through the floor dropping into a large room overflowing with large pipes and mechanical equipment. He strolled clandestinely to the center of the room, his armor clanking with every step. He then knelt touching a large reactor with his whole right hand, palming the apparatus absorbedly.
Standing leisurely he unleashed a fuchsia veil which pixilated into an orb around his well-built body. With the snap of a finger the covering ruptured then shattering complimented appropriately with the sound of breaking glass.
“Hey!” he has been discovered.
The now unconcealed man turned, his jacket placidly whipped around him little by little, bit by bit. The guard that discovered him stood staring in awe at the enigmatic body, realizing then that he was now his prey. The guard backed away frightfully, his body shaking, eyes uneased.
The man stepped closer to guard, the sound of armor shifting echoed throughout the room. The guard dropped to the ground frantically crawling backwards only to meet a wall. The armored clad man took one final step watching a chill of dread consumed him, “I…I don’t want to die!”
Death is a privilege…
The mysterious words lingered through the air shoving fear further down the guard’s emotional throat. A blanket of shadows frenzied around the terror infringed human. He attempted to scream only to have his mouth immediately covered by the layer of shade, releasing a frail whimper instead.
The evanescent man stood there gazing at the cold, damp floor the scene of his murder. His lust for blood seemed to have rapidly spiked driving him mad, producing thoughts of more destruction and chaos by his hands.
Are you ready?…
Let the reckoning begin…
His reign shall be restored…
After a few moments of contemplation, he looked up from the murder scene ready to progress. He tranquilly raised his left hand and pointed it towards the nearest doorway. With a short breath, he began to sigh, engulfing the wondering carbon dioxide in a veil of dusk. The obscurity that was his design hastily pierced the door. Drilling, tearing it to shreds allowing others to know that he was there. He confidently walked out the room with assurance no longer caring if he was seen.
“We got a break in!” a guard in a patrol room signaled into an earpiece after witnessing the man’s exertion on camera. Militants flooded into the hall, in which the knight resided, as they aimed their rifles. The officer signaled his hand, unleashing a massive salvo of gunfire.
The man sneered, maneuvering around the ammunition as though they were standing still. He then halted extending his arm materializing an enormous zanbato He swung it, wiping out the entire platoon in a matter of seconds. He nonchalantly walked into a stairwell, finding more soldiers pointing their feeble weapons at him. The man speedily lunged his blade through five of the guards, aiming his right-hand instantaneously combusting them in a flare of necroforce, causing blood to discharge in all directions. Continuing down the stairs, the armored man spun hacking into another assemblage of guards.
Overhearing the call of a surviving guard, the man forced his sword through the man’s skull, pivoting it to the left making sure the nescience didn’t come back.
He pointed his left-hand towards the fire exit and began to psychically heave the surviving guards back into the stairwell.
At that moment the man clutched his hands into a fist, causing their own silhouettes to rush into his victim’s bodies; their eyes rolled into the backs of their heads, their skin crawled, bones popping. Unexpectedly, the guards imploded expelling shockwaves from the remains of their now limp and unrecognizable bodies.
Walking up to the door leading to the main floor the man flung it open effortlessly. Once inside, he met more guards organized to try and defeat him. Annoyed by this new interruption he simply ran into the middle of the horde and began to hack away mercilessly, slicing them to pieces one by one, their vile screams of torture and pain were like a sweet tunes to his psychotic ears. The murderer then plunged his sword into the ground, igniting a detonation created from the glooming shadows of his sufferers ominously desolating that region of the building.
While admiring his work, he opened the door before him letting go of the sword as it faded away into nothingness. The lingering flames from his catastrophic assault flamboyantly danced around his feet as he entered the lobby.
The armored man passed through the door, stumbling upon a lone body, fully clad in a tight armored bodysuit standing amongst a cluster of scattered fallen soldiers. The man stood eyeing the figure scanning him deciding whether or not he would be a threat.
The person began to scale the mountain that was the stairs, his crimson cape gaudily flapping in the placid wind, locking his eyes with the ghostly knight; reaching behind him grasping the hilt of his blade.
The bleak knight merely positioned his right hand before him collecting the shade cast by the florescent media board above, producing his commanding zanbato.
The glow from the screen above left a vexed reflection on the combatant’s helmet as he stared at the mystifying feet being performed before him. The bodysuit contracted around his chest and abs in reaction to his sudden tensing.
The lone warrior lowered his head then drawing a nodachi blade comparable in size to the knight’s. The two of them ran towards each other finally uniting a few steps below the top. The knight swung his blade with his left hand slicing into his opponent’s shoulder guard. The fighter slid backwards down the stairs latching onto the railing on the side, pivoting himself on top of it and then into the air. The man stood in unrecognizable awe as the fighter attempted a kick to his neck. The knight leaned forward grabbing his ankle with his free hand volleying him to the peak of the stairs. The fighter gracefully landed on the balls of his feet, lifting his sword in front of him to fend off an attack by the knight. The potent knight dropped to the bottom of the staircase sliding backwards, slipping due to the increased amount of rain. They quickly examined each other before taking a swift step forward flinging themselves at each other. They quickly exchanged an innumerable amount blows. The ghastly knight launched his weapon in a sweeping motion knocking the combatant into the murky heavens. The fighter dropped from the sky slamming his razor-edge blade into the crest of the stairs destroying the face of the bastion sending debris in all directions. The fighter slid into a battle stance placing his nodachi onto his shoulder inspecting the province for his adversary as the smolder cleared.
The warrior straighten up allowing his sword to drape loosely from his hand, then with a sigh he leapt backwards nearly being struck by a fallen column. The fighter looked up to uncover the armored man suspended in the night sky virtually enclosed in the perpetual darkness.
With a coy smirk hidden inside his helmet the warrior vaulted into the air contracting his clutch on the hilt. The two met in the sky above the well-illuminated conurbation balanced on a nonexistent surface. Suddenly, the knight shifted into motion propelling himself towards the fighter. The adverse fighter twisted slightly rolling over the back of the knight planting his feet briefly on the side of the citadel projecting forward.
They met once again floating above the city life this time clashing, swords in hand in a full out melee display. The knight flung his right hand to the side then swiping it forward telekinetically lifting Eigezzes by their shadows. The fighter grabbed the edge of the vehicle’s windshields turning over it shooting unswervingly through another’s transom. He leapt onto a third car adjusting his footing as it slowly began to fall. The warrior jumped using the knight’s zanbato for leverage for another jump. He landed of the roof of an Eigezz leaning forward stirring it closer the knight. The knight cloth lined the fighter as he lunged his sword forward. From there the fighter clutched another Eigezzes’ hood spinning into the air, grasping the window ceil of a skyscraper, dangling from one hand. He looked beneath him to see his adversary evaporate into the darkness. The fighter pulled himself onto the ledge darting up the side of the building. The knight reappeared behind him lunging his cutting edge. The combatant froze suddenly bursting into action again, using his feet to push himself over his challenger. The knight twisted placing a foot on the ceil shoving himself in the direction of the fighter. The warrior turned taking the advantage, catching his opponent off guard by casting himself upside down projecting towards the heavily inhabited streets. As the warrior plummeted the knight pointed his cleaver at his challenger pulling a hidden trigger in its handle. The sword began to split into two separate blades on the hilt allowing an automatic rifle to thrust forward placing it in between the massive blades. Under the gun a broadsword shot out and rounded the hilt latching onto the adverse end. The knight pulled the trigger again diffusing an onslaught of rounds. The warrior spun his weapon deflecting the bullets, and then flexibly arched his back allowing him to grab the head of a gargoyle statue, volleying himself around it. The knight then disbanded into a blur of anonymity.
The warrior continued to descend turning his body to look for the knight who at that moment appeared behind him forcing the broadsword end of the blade through the fighter’s stomach. The fighter squealed as the dark knight threw him onto the stairs watching him roll to the cement foundation at the foot of the stairs. Struggling to rise the warrior winced as the knight crept closer. The austere knight sited the rifle at the combatant who was struck by panic.
Eclipse reap sins for my feeding, a new era has begun…
Project Metro Apocalypse
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Posted: Wed Aug 01, 2007 10:40 pm
I'm assuming no one liked it.
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Posted: Mon Aug 06, 2007 11:12 am
Dragonix-Blader I'm assuming no one liked it. You assumed wrong! I love how descriptive it is, you can see what you're writing about! The story draws you in. I can't wait to see the first person, I think that will be neat since the character has a mysteriousness about him.
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Posted: Mon Aug 20, 2007 5:21 pm
Thanks for your review. I wonder if anyone else is going to read it?
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Posted: Tue Aug 21, 2007 6:28 am
Dragonix-Blader Thanks for your review. I wonder if anyone else is going to read it?
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