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Wrote this yesterday..... |
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So today was the long awaited day for me. The day that I test for my black belt. To some people this may not seem insignificant, espacially to those whom don't train. But for me, this was something more than just a black belt testing. Today was the beginning of new chapter in my life. It's like all four years of my life in Tae Kwon Do were just the prelude to a great book, and now, after my testing today, I'm starting on the first chapter.
This morning when I woke up, outside was hot, humid, and sort of muggy. Inside during the testing, I was sweating, but it wasn't as hot as it could have been. While testing, I was calm, collected. I wasn't nervous or that anxious about something I did wrong. Well, I did kind of cringe when I didn't get two of the kicks that the newly ranked Master Forsberg had us do. It took me a minute to think about how to do.
I think my most favorite parts during my testing was the knife and gun defense, and having Master Yordan putting my black belt on. Actually, I don't think there was a point during the entire testing that I was thinking "When is this going to stop?" or "This isn't worth it." If I had to do that testing over agian, I would in a heartbeat. I've doubted myself a lot in the last two months. Looking back upon all of my inhibitions about today, I laugh at them. I needn't have had a care in the world. Well, maybe one or two, but seriously, the things that I was worried about didn't even hinder me once. I got up there and I did what I had to do; it was as simple as that.
There were so many times today where I wanted to start crying from all of the emotions that were trying to take over all at once. I especially wanted to cry during the belt ceremony, but I held it in. I would have been so embarassed that I was crying. I feel ashamed when I do, so I didn't.
As Master Yordan and Master Dunlavey, few people get to experience what me and ten others got to go through today. Not many people can say that they've tested for their black belt. Even fewer can say they've tested for their fourth dan, but that's not my story to tell. But what I went through today.... there's just nothing to describe the feeling that I had when I had passed. Absolutley no words to describe it. It was the first of many totally awesome moments that I will have in my life time.
Kenki · Mon Aug 06, 2007 @ 12:49am · 1 Comments |
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