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Day 1979 of being an Evil Proctologist, Somewhere off the Coast of Nebraska...

Recap: Proctologist Nefarious runs an evil organization with his henchmen, Scout, Hench2, Adrian Glorp, and Geeky a** Scientist who is called Todd. At this very moment in time, Nefarious has found Scout, after days of searching, and only hours left before the lair falls apart from lack of duct tape. Can Nefarious convince Scout to come back before the Nefarious Lair falls into ruin?

Geeky a** Scientist: I don't know, isn't that sort of the point of you reading this? So you can find out?
Nefarious: We were getting to that.
Geeky a** Scientist: Who's We?

Recap: ANYWAY! Wait, since when was I a character? That will be explained soon I hope. I have to read these episodes as they come. I'm sort of stuck in the past here, so I don't know any more than anyone else. So back to the latest journal entry of Proctologist Nefarious...

____________________________________________________________________

I could feel a hand scrape across mine like a hand scraping across my hand. Don't ask me about my ability to come up with good metaphors. I'm drowning for hell's sake! With tremendous force, (more than I thought possible for him...) Scout lifted me out of the water, dripping, cold, and wet. (That's usually what water does to people.)
Nefarious: Scout! *Cough* You saved my life! You have to come back now! Don't you see? I need you!
Scout: Actually, watching you 'flip' yourself off that diving board, into an unconscious state made me realize that without me, your whole world domination schemes would fall apart like a Jenga game. So, it seems I have no choice. I'll come back with you Nefarious.
Nefarious: Excellent! I'm happy you chose that option. Because already I need your help Scout.
Scout: With what?
Nefarious: Well... I used up all the jetpack fuel so there's no way to get back.
Scout: Used up the- Doing what?

-Earlier

Nefarious: Hey America, This is Evil Jackass! And I'm Proctologist Knoxville! Today, I'm gonna throw myself off a volcano, with an untested jetpack! Okay, let's gooooooooo!

-Now

Nefarious: So, I need help thinking of a way to get back...

Scout, smacking his head in agonizing pity for me, sighed a long hard sigh.

Scout: Nefarious. Why are you considered an evil genius?
Nefarious: Because you're not evil, I am. You just make sure that all my plans work.
Scout: *starts to speak* Nevermind... Let's just go to a Waka Liki Jet rental.
(Because it's easy to make up phony Hawaiian sounding things!)
Nefarious: Where's the nearest one?
Scout: About a 32 hour hike.
Nefarious: How big is this ******** island???
Scout: Why?
Nefarious: It's going to be cutting it close. But we have to try. All right! Let's go!









Scout: Is that it?
Nefarious: Yeah, I think that's the end of the episode.
Scout: Kind of short don't you think?
Nefarious: No, this is about standard length.
Scout: Maybe with this cute little thing at the end here, but it seems like your slacking a bit Nefarious.
Nefarious: Give it time, this was more of a plot advancer, not a huge comedic adventure. That's next time.
Scout: How long is it going to take to write that one?
Nefarious: Um-

END....?