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irony of the third degree
why is it i cant be bothered to put an entry in here without it being about something that doesnt matter to anyone? like now ive been pushed away from the people id attached myself to, as has happened repeatedly. ill find someone who needs me, ill become their closest friend, or more, and then theyll find someone else, or just decide they dont need me anymore and start pushing me away, and when im to far away to be gotten back, they decide they were wrong and try to get me back. is this what im destined for? crying that would be an extremely sucky way to spend my life. gonk especially considering that all i really want is to be wanted, to be cared about, to matter, even if i am strong enough to go on after a blow. i suppose thats why my empathy is always growing stronger with each time i have to leave. boy thats sad. pity me. or something... i dunno, im just kind of overwhelmed with this sense of aimless unhappiness which aggrivates the hell out of me because i feel fine now, even if its still sore, like a bruise that takes ******** forever to heal, y'know? but to those who would be worried, dont be. just be kind and make sure i dont do anything stupid, alright? wink
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