|
|
|
February 12th, 2008 5:14 PM
Keeping it all hidden away
I have noticed a bad habbit forming, or shall I say reforming? I am starting to hide my feelings away, when I am upset. All the people I used to rely on for support through my family issues, and my depression, have gotten tired of listening to me, and have started to push me away. I have started to keep everything inside. I am getting pretty good at it pretty quickly. I started this journal, as a healthy way to get my feelings out.
How are people so blind? I work in retail, and everyday I show up with a smile, and a good attitue, outside. People think I am the poster girl for a good attitude, and being happy. They are sadly mistaken. I stand behind the counter, and I smile at people, but what I am thinking is far different. Yea thats it, go on your phone in the back, and leave me all the work, thats fair, I hope you choke on that candy your munching. "Yep, all taken care of, have a nice day, Next!" Yea its NO problem that you stupidly lost your receipt and now want me to check all of your 15 credit cards while the line buids up.
When I am online talking to my real life friends, I could be crying. "How are you -real name." "Im fine, thankyou, and yourself?"
They even fall for it on the phone sometimes.
I ask myself, how my coworkers can fall for my smile.. I feel it waver, and they still think Im fine. I have had to bite my lip to keep from crying/getting angery and they still don't notice.
Well, that is for the better I guess. I want to keep my job...
 CommonPhenomenon · Tue Feb 12, 2008 @ 10:20pm · 0 Comments |
|
|
|
|
|
