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well the title said it all . ther seems to be allot of things going to me lately . wore rather people around me . my sis broke it off withe her bf . mom and me never see eyes to eye .. usually ends up in one of us gritting hurt . Christmas is coming . and the #1 on my list id my predicament at the moment. OK lets start at the top of the list. well sister broke it off withe bf .. i hat to say i saw that coming. he was a nice guy treated her well to a point seem to be going grate i was happy for her that she found some one . i know this will shock people but it is true . it was just the smile on her face never left it . now the one day it all wint to pot will not say why but neediness to say i see him a gen bed over in insert foot if you understand me hehe razz i know im bad . now on for #2

me and mum ... allwase the problem it seems. now off the bat i love my mother she has taught me some good things. but ok .. my mum has he problems as every one dose. so i am supportive and help the best i can . but one thing i have realized. we can not live in the same house together . will drive each other insane . put it this way i have my dads frame of mind to a point and well mum has her own as ever one dose . well ok so now i have gotten better withe talking to my mum and she withe me on sertin things . we had a descuon the other day . on a tapick we should have stayed away from we both disagree and dont budge. lol .. so that's ware i get it from lol just kidding .Anny ho .. we had said desction and my mother said i was very negative .. i do agree i do get negative especially that topic.. but it hurt it all wase dose whe she tells me that . i do not deny i have been very negative in the past cousing me harm * shuter* of my own accord. but needles to say ive got a huge kick in the but so to say and got a healthy dose of realty and i have changed. i wanted to prove my self right to day so i asked a co worker of mine if she thought i was very negative and she said i do have my moments along withe every one ... i agree lately i have been bad but im not all the time. yes you will see i rambel alot but i rather git it off my chest .

ok next ahh yes Christmas. well ok let see. it is usaly a happy time of the year. usualy is for my famoly depending . lol . every one gets to get opens presents and wate all day .. ( not relaly but still ) for a part of my famoly and then opens presents and eat and go home ... but for witch ever reson i fell the drama lingering in the distance . jsut this 6 sence of mine lol .


ok shall we move on lol. ok well my predicament that's making me sleepless . well ok me and the bf . we have hit a ruff patch i think im not shrue .. well ok i started dating my ex agen and we did not tell his parents course of reasons . fine save his hide and mine. my mistake told my mom .. she keeps nagging me a bout it and ya not difference we have i give people second chance .. just me i gues . well ok so things go soothe well to me .. he has pointed out some problems i have to work on and i am not very well but im trying . i have given more space then i did last time 8 blushed 8 was really really bad for that .. im more understanding of things he has to do and take car of at home ... im really good at it at the moment lol ... well i think i am razz .. so i love him very much but im not so sure he love me back .. im not even sure if he knows him self . i would like it to work but i have a felling its not going to .. one of my hunches .. if we cant then fine we gave it another shot and that the cue to say friends then date witch is fine for me .. i just don't want it to end i toddle under stand if it has to . it fells like hes got allot on his pate and i understand that to .. i just wish i dint fell pushed off to the side at the moment .. yet gen i contradict my self .. i really do under stand i just we could talk things threw withe out me sounding whiny witch i probably do now ... lol oh well . i just wish i could help more but i know he kneads his space to sort things out for him self so ill give it to him and try not to cause more problems for him . ive bin on edge sinse the first time we have talked to day watched for the yes or no but it hasten happened yet so i will wate and if he wants me im hear if not then ... then ya .. ill still have a friend well i hope