lucas is back in my life. somehow he manipulated me into talking to him again but nothing bad is coming from me and him talking. it's his friend Zack. i dont know what to do... he is confusing and just started talking to me. Sean told me today that i might still be his babygirl. no answers came after that. he was gone. he wasnt bothering me for the longest time. i thought that he would never bother me in this way again. God removed him from my list of burdens and now its back. he was the first guy i ever loved as a boyfriend. then everything just came and it is bad. he doesnt get what he is doing to me. i dont want to deal with him. i dont want to be hurt again. i loved him so much. i was over him. why did he have to tell me i might still be his babygirl. Andrew has been here for me forever and i am so thankful for that. It is so annoying not getting the answers i need. ugh....why why why. school starts in 13 days. im not ready to go back. i want to but i dont. no sean doesnt go to my school but everyone else pretty much has a relationship. oh and the guy i like, joey is dating my best friend amy on top of it all. mike is cool and so is james. out of state relationships is something i will never get into even tho i want to. i am happy for amy, believe it or not. Mike is 18. that cant happen. matt well, no i wont hurt tyler by doing that. carson, no that cant happen either. Andrew is in florida and i am only a sister to him. sean already hurt me and i dont want it any more. gosh i wish this wasnt so difficult.
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