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protect your nuts!
The Set Up
PostPosted by: F---ING WHITE TRASH Sun Feb 05, 2006 @ 01:29am



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shadefox2
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commentCommented on: Wed Feb 08, 2006 @ 03:27am
pretty good, however you went from repeating My world in the first line of every rhyme in the first stanza to it just not being there anymore, it lost its what do you call it, its pattern changed in the first stanza and the second. but the over all rhymes were good and it followed the same story line for the most part.


commentCommented on: Wed Feb 08, 2006 @ 04:12am
yeah, but thats what i was thinking at the time. i was kinda pissed off at the world. i wrote it a few years ago and decided to post it. things werent going my way. not getting what i wanted. my first gf and s**t, just not so great. made me mad and i just came up eith this s**t. it didnt go with what was going on at the time, but it does have anger.



F---ING WHITE TRASH
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