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'Ello! Rolen Londone here with ROAM 76.8, you get the picture- now- I was not avaliable to give my broadcast on Thursday due to massive amounts of booze and gambling personal conflicts. But, I would not allow my listeners to have to go on without my voice on New Years, what kind of a cruel radio host would I be if I did? So, let's get down to business with the news, first.
Balls: Turns out, there are a lot of balls coming with this New Years. Yes. Balls. You got balls. Innuendo aside, the Zurg Hive (I still don't believe in aliens, so don't start!) is hosting a ball. Me? Not interested, so that's why I am cutting off here. Another thing about Zurg? Their Santa beat our Santa. Balogna is the first word that comes to mind to me.
Gawing Pawstal!: I was always appreciative of artists, and so are the politico heads over at Gaia Town Hall. They will show us the letters they get! Wooh! You get to look at pictures of... things... various things. So, don't be shy- meet a guy- pull up a chair, and look at art.
Hehe... balls.
Now, news aside, I have a speacial guest with me tonight, his name is Lewud Akket. He has written many books, none of which have a title... or content. He is the only person in all of Gaia- that I know of- who has vowed to have absolutely no alcohol. For any New Year's party. I have strong opinions on alcohol consumption, so that is why I was this close to tearing off his finger nails when he told me his resolution. May I welcome, LEWUD AKKET!
Err... Lewud? Why do you keep nodding your head at me? Arn't you going to say 'Hello'?
"Hello, Rolen."
Good, good. I thought you were slightly insane for a second there. Heh... heh... ehh...
"That's what a few people say."
Eh. Sure. Now, you have vowed to consume no booze, hooch, alcohol, Jesus-Juice, or even Hair of the Dog?
"Living off nature is alright, but not off dog. To continue thoroughly- no."
That's all I wanted to know. Now... you do realize your name is-
"Yes."
Good. Good. Now, I hope you gave your parents hell for naming you 'Lewd'.
"It is Lewud."
Lewud.
"The answer is no. I love my parents."
Eh, alright, that's... good enough, I guess. Now, tell me more about your vow.
"I won't drink."
Ever?
"Only for New Years."
Oh, so you can spike up on New Years eve and let that ride you through?
"No."
Oh. So, more about your name, how'd your parents come to be so cruel? Lewud? Lewud? Oh, comeon, where are you going?
Lewud, don't be like that. I am not supposed to leave the microphone. Lewud? Please, come back!
Where are you going? You can't drive away, come on! At least give me the forty gold I paid you to come. Please! No! NO! DON'T!
I will not stop following you! Your bicycle is no match for Rolen Londone's track record!
Hah! You can't bike too far without your shoes!
Aww... screw it.
Rolen Londone · Mon Jan 01, 2007 @ 04:49am · 0 Comments |
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