i will now list the things i learnt while visiting some friends on a neighboring cow farm unsupervised.
1. cows are not horses.
2. cows do not enjoy being ridden upon.
3. never turn ur back on a cow if u have hair the color of hay
4. make sure the cow is asleep before u attempt to tip it
5. never try running headlong into the broad side of a cow in an attempt to tip it
6. make sure u can tell the difference between a domesticated cow and a bull
7. if u cannot tell the difference between a domesticated cow and a bull, do not attempt cow tipping
8. if u decide to try cow tipping anyway, make sure u have an easy exit
9. brown cows do not give chocolate milk
10. if u dicide to visit friends on a neighboring cow farm that holds over 200 animals, do not forget to close the gate
dramallama
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KitN_007
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its time to talk of other things..of shoes and ships and ceiling wax and cabbages and kings..
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deathsquirrel Community Member |
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1. You CAN'T drink the milk directly from the cow.
2. Do NOT wear your good shoes out to the cow field.
3. If you are going out to the farm be sure that you can take a shower right after; you might want it.
4. Do NOT urinate in front of the calves; penises look oddly like the tips of an udder.
5. Do NOT offer to shovel the cow dung, for god's sake don't do it.
6. If 2 cats are screaming in the corner and rolling around odds are they're not wrestling
7. Cow dung is very messy when wet
8. Cow dung is very slippery when wet
9. Smelling like cow does NOT make you seem sexy to the opposite sex.