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I was at a camping trip
With my family and my friends
Setting up camp, getting dinner ready
Near where the trail ends

The night was fun, the food was great
The stories were scary, but very entertaining
We were all having fun, and then I turned my head,
And Grandpa strapped on a timer bomb that said, “180 seconds remaining”

We all stood there for a while
Kinda letting the image flow through our mind
Then Grandpa said,
“There is a fox chewing on my behind”

He turned around and we all looked
It was there, sure as a rut
A pretty red fox with a fluffy tail
Biting down on Grandpa’s b***

And Grandma said, “Well, don’t just stand there,
There’s a fox on your behind. Do something!”
Grandpa thought for a moment
Then he ran straight out of the clearing

We all stood there, not knowing what to do
Our minds were too loaded
Then, just a half-mile away
The forest just kinda exploded

We all stood there for a little while more,
Grandma holding her coffee cup
Then little baby cousin James said,
“Grandpa blew up!”

We all stood there wondering,
Then there was a rustling near the trail
The Grandpa came out and said, “Hey, look what I found!”
And held up a burnt, red, fluffy tail

[it sucks. I know. It's one of my first ones]