This summer, I dated Paul. Paul, a ******** douchebag, and I dated for two months, and I thought we were in love. I had known him since I was six, and I had liked him for ten years before we dated. I know that sounds ******** pathetic, but get over it. It's what I felt, and this is the truth.
Anyway, Paul broke up with me on July 1, 2007. I immediately became depressed, and unwilling to focus on anything. I ate my weight in chocolate, and I was determined to think that he still had feelings for me. Finally, one day in October, I saw his new girlfriend and her child. For some reason, things clicked. I wasn't putting out! :O That was the day I got over my ex boyfriend, the one who insisted I paid for all our dates, including his lunch on the day he broke up with me.
Through Paul, however, I knew his best friend, Timothy. Timothy was a quiet kid, very artistic. I had known him for a while, through out the past year or so, anyway, and I never saw him in a way that was more than friendly. He was a goof, and I enjoyed being close to him. One day, though, I saw something in him, and I can't really see what it is. We started talking more, and more, and more, until finally he asked me to "hang out" which wasn't techincally a date because he just wanted to hang out outside of Paul and church.
So, Timothy and I went to the cornmaze. We held hands throught the whole night, and my friend Sarah, who also went, had never flirted with any boy at the time. She asked me in private to help her while at the maze, and so I did. I flirted with her, but I didn't mean any of it. Timothy was jealous, and he grabed my hand and started to pull me away. I felt like he would be a protective boyfriend, and on the outside I acted like it bothered me, while it actually made me feel good on the inside.
So, that one "non-date" led to another "non-date", which turned out to be at a giant garden on a local college campus. We walked through the gardens, talked, took pictures of each other and of people we didn't know, you know the drill. After that, we went to the mall, and that's when we started to be a couple, boyfriend-girlfriend. That was on November 5, 2007. It made me feel wanted again, which I hadn't felt since around the middle of my relationship with Paul. Paul made me feel empty in my relationship with him, while Timothy made me feel giddy, and I actually liked that. Around him, I could be ME, not who he wanted me to be.
Timothy and I have been dating for two months on 1/05/07, which is mind-boggling to me. It feels like it's been so much longer, in a good way, and I am happy about that. He's adorable, and I'm glad to have him in my life. I actually thank God for him.
For all of this, I thank Paul. If he hadn't ever stomped all over my heart, I wouldn't have ever been able to move on and see Timothy for the amazing person that he is. I love Timothy, although I haven't told him that yet. We had our first kiss on 12/20/07, and it was amazing. Thank you, Paul Mark Cunningham. You're a man whore, who constantly has to have a girlfriend, and I thank you for that. Adios.
G y p s i e 2 2 3 · Tue Jan 01, 2008 @ 06:09pm · 1 Comments |